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Another point worth making is that alot of times anxiety is something caused by chemical imbalances in the brain, which people are born with. Anxiety can manifest itself in many different clinically diagnosable disorders and these situations aren't affected by someones physical appearance or bankroll.
I like confidence (duh), but please have something to be confident about. Otherwise, it just feels like you're blowing air and comes off as fake. And yes, I am able to tell when a guy is faking confidence. Puffing of the chest is usually involved.
There must be something said for the power of genuineness. It leaves a stronger impression.
In terms of myself and confidence, I'm with PassTheChocolate. I've reached the point where I can act like whoever/whatever I want to be. Naturally, this is easier when I'm not wearing sweats and could stand to take a shower. Therefore, I've made it a habit to almost always take care of my appearance. It just makes everything so much simpler.
Why do you care if a woman who's not interested in you feels the need to create excuses for why she's not interested in you?
Not one person came close to addressing my point. Is there any factual basis for these hunches women have and act on or is this just typical prejudice masquerading as women's intuition and self serving behavior?
Over the years, I've seen the results of this many times. Good men screwed over and a$$holes given a free pass. Then, when the chickens come home to roost, the good men again are evaluated against a standards set by the a$$holes and more free passes are given out.
This is hardly my problem because I really don't give a damn anymore. I'm just fed up with this obvious double standard and most men with any life experience, agree with me.
I think women can sense when a man might have a hidden chip on his shoulder and this becomes a turn-off in itself...Some men in the "nice guys always finish last club" are carrying around a lot of hostility and negative expectations that women can pick up....I know I did when I was single. This is unfortunate for everyone.
It's funny how whenever the confidence thing comes up, there are always some obscure explanations trying to justify this belief. I remember a thread not long ago where people would try to argue that a woman dying her hair red had no effect because of her new look, but "she might be more confident and men pick up on it".
Come on people, if we start to think in things that could have been, there could be hundreds. How are we supposed to make conclusions or learn anything if we are constantly making up esoteric explanations?
I think women can sense when a man might have a hidden chip on his shoulder and this becomes a turn-off in itself...Some men in the "nice guys always finish last club" are carrying around a lot of hostility and negative expectations that women can pick up....I know I did when I was single. This is unfortunate for everyone.
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Originally Posted by NotARedneck
Not one person came close to addressing my point. Is there any factual basis for these hunches women have and act on or is this just typical prejudice masquerading as women's intuition and self serving behavior?
Over the years, I've seen the results of this many times. Good men screwed over and a$$holes given a free pass. Then, when the chickens come home to roost, the good men again are evaluated against a standards set by the a$$holes and more free passes are given out. This is hardly my problem because I really don't give a damn anymore. I'm just fed up with this obvious double standard and most men with any life experience, agree with me.
Of course there is no factual basis for being attracted to someone. Attraction is not a logical process, which is why when people try to explain being attracted to one person an not another it usually makes no sense. The underlined and bolded portions of your post are a bit confusing for me. How is it prejudice to not be attracted to someone? And what is self serving in this situation? And what double standard? Folks are under no obligation to be attracted to any specific person or have a relationship with someone they don't want to be with. I'm not attacking your stance/opinion. I just don't understand it
Not one person came close to addressing my point. Is there any factual basis for these hunches women have and act on or is this just typical prejudice masquerading as women's intuition and self serving behavior?
Yes, and if I know the guy I can usually see it as well. These guys have glaring personality defects such as hatred of women and self-loathing. All of the guys who I know personally and think are genuinely 'nice guys' have NO problem getting girls. But they themselves go for nice girls, not train wrecks waiting to happen.
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Over the years, I've seen the results of this many times. Good men screwed over and a$$holes given a free pass. Then, when the chickens come home to roost, the good men again are evaluated against a standards set by the a$$holes and more free passes are given out.
It's simple. There are 2 kinds of women who like jerks:
1. Emotionally immature. These women easily fall for false charm. They don't realize the guy is a jerk until later.
2. Misguided. These are women who think they can 'fix' broken men. They know a guy has major personality flaws and that's why they choose him. These women are an emotional mess themselves and best avoided altogether.
Admittedly there are lots of women in those 2 groups. But there are at least as many women who are mature and nice themselves, and those are the ones who like nice guys.
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This minefield you speak of...it's entirely IN YOUR MIND!
Attraction is not a logical process, which is why when people try to explain being attracted to one person an not another it usually makes no sense. The underlined and bolded portions of your post are a bit confusing for me. How is it prejudice to not be attracted to someone? And what is self serving in this situation? And what double standard? Folks are under no obligation to be attracted to any specific person or have a relationship with someone they don't want to be with. I'm not attacking your stance/opinion. I just don't understand it 
