When someone wants to fly in just to meet you. (dating, man)
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Okay, so I have a cousin who is doing the online dating thing. She works quite a bit and is looking for someone local who's interested in something less involved. She doesn't have a lot of time to nurture something full time and is really not interested in a full time thing anyway.
A man from another state contacts her. He doesn't visit where she lives at all, doesn't have any business ties there. She told him that travel is not an option for her. He says he is willing to fly there to meet her.
The first concern for her is that if she doesn't like him, she doesn't want to have to spend more than dinner with him (and that is if he's tolerable for that long). He is talking about dinner and a movie, or dancing. If they don't like each other, it will have been a wasted trip. I told her that's really up to him to decide whether it is worth the time and money to fly in and she doesn't have to do anything she doesn't want to do. She should express this to him. She did. He said he was okay with that.
The second concern is that if they do hit it off, he will want her to spend more time with him than she is willing to, like entire weekends. She doesn't see how he would be okay with flying all that way just to spend a few hours with her. If he had family or business here, it would be different. She expressed this to him as well, he said it was fine as long as she made it worth his while. Of course, that could mean many things, but let's say it's just about sex. It seems silly to spend hours going to the airport, going through security, renting a car and a hotel just for sex.
There is something desperate and/or off about this. Why wouldn't he just find someone local?
Okay, so I have a cousin who is doing the online dating thing. She works quite a bit and is looking for someone local who's interested in something less involved. She doesn't have a lot of time to nurture something full time and is really not interested in a full time thing anyway.
A man from another state contacts her. He doesn't visit where she lives at all, doesn't have any business ties there. She told him that travel is not an option for her. He says he is willing to fly there to meet her.
The first concern for her is that if she doesn't like him, she doesn't want to have to spend more than dinner with him (and that is if he's tolerable for that long). He is talking about dinner and a movie, or dancing. If they don't like each other, it will have been a wasted trip. I told her that's really up to him to decide whether it is worth the time and money to fly in and she doesn't have to do anything she doesn't want to do. She should express this to him. She did. He said he was okay with that.
The second concern is that if they do hit it off, he will want her to spend more time with him than she is willing to, like entire weekends. She doesn't see how he would be okay with flying all that way just to spend a few hours with her. If he had family or business here, it would be different. She expressed this to him as well, he said it was fine as long as she made it worth his while. Of course, that could mean many things, but let's say it's just about sex. It seems silly to spend hours going to the airport, going through security, renting a car and a hotel just for sex.
There is something desperate and/or off about this. Why wouldn't he just find someone local?
Even if he did want sex, he shouldn't have said it. And the furthest I had a guy come from was Pittsburgh to meet me. We spent a day together...no sex though.
Okay, so I have a cousin who is doing the online dating thing. She works quite a bit and is looking for someone local who's interested in something less involved. She doesn't have a lot of time to nurture something full time and is really not interested in a full time thing anyway.
A man from another state contacts her. He doesn't visit where she lives at all, doesn't have any business ties there. She told him that travel is not an option for her. He says he is willing to fly there to meet her.
The first concern for her is that if she doesn't like him, she doesn't want to have to spend more than dinner with him (and that is if he's tolerable for that long). He is talking about dinner and a movie, or dancing. If they don't like each other, it will have been a wasted trip. I told her that's really up to him to decide whether it is worth the time and money to fly in and she doesn't have to do anything she doesn't want to do. She should express this to him. She did. He said he was okay with that.
The second concern is that if they do hit it off, he will want her to spend more time with him than she is willing to, like entire weekends. She doesn't see how he would be okay with flying all that way just to spend a few hours with her. If he had family or business here, it would be different. She expressed this to him as well, he said it was fine as long as she made it worth his while. Of course, that could mean many things, but let's say it's just about sex. It seems silly to spend hours going to the airport, going through security, renting a car and a hotel just for sex.
There is something desperate and/or off about this. Why wouldn't he just find someone local?
I've the feeling I'm in some parallel universe last few days on this forum. How do you suppose people meet if neither one goes to meet the other? What if somebody just likes a particular person and he/she is not local? Or are you generally against every long-distance encounter? Or do you think there HAS to be something wrong with everybody willing to put some effort into something?
There is something desperate and/or off about this. Why wouldn't he just find someone local?
I dunno, Choc. For some people, flying and traveling is really no big deal -- they do it all the time and have the finances that make it possible. If I were single, I would think nothing of spending a few hundred bucks and hopping on an airplane to meet a promising gal. I have a schedule that gives me plenty of time away from the office and the wherewithal to hop a flight if I choose. I love to travel -- just give me an excuse to go someplace new and I'm there.
I've the feeling I'm in some parallel universe last few days on this forum. How do you suppose people meet if neither one goes to meet the other? What if somebody just likes a particular person and he/she is not local? Or are you generally against every long-distance encounter? Or do you think there HAS to be something wrong with everybody willing to put some effort into something?
Well he did say she'd have to make it "worth his while". One could only assume this guy is expecting some ass.
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