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Scenario: Two single people meet sometime in their 30's. Both work. Decide they want to marry--but retain their jobs. I would assume they live in the same household, but that may not be the case.
At this point, they're really nothing more than room mates that split the cost of rent and other expenses that happen to have sex with the legal recognition of the state. In other words, if two people get married, the lower wage earner should quit their job and take care of THEIR home. Male, female, whichever it happens to be.
I don't agree that it can't be done with ONE income. The kids may not have an Xbox or Wii...and might have to play with tin cans (actually, they're steel) and sticks, but it can be done.
Why do you feel this is necessary? What's the downside to both partners finding gainful employment outside the home?
Or are you just saying this is your definition of marriage? If you've never been a stay-at-home spouse, perhaps you can't imagine what it might really be like. Do you honestly think it would suit you, personally, if your spouse made enough money to support the family?
Why do you feel this is necessary? What's the downside to both partners finding gainful employment outside the home?
Or are you just saying this is your definition of marriage? If you've never been a stay-at-home spouse, perhaps you can't imagine what it might really be like. Do you honestly think it would suit you, personally, if your spouse made enough money to support the family?
The home suffers. I'm a product of divorced parents, and it was just impossible for her to both take care of her work obligations and her family and home obligations.
As far as would I be willing to do so? I seriously doubt it. I believe in traditional roles, on a personal level. But this isn't about me. But hypothetically, if I wasn't so tied into being the sole financial provider, then yes, I guess I would be the one staying home, doing the shopping and cooking. I'd just hope she's got a cast iron stomach, like I do. Because much of the food I cook isn't really fit for human consumption (and I've been told that).
Then they are obviously living beyond their means. That's a big problem for some people.
I agree with that. They should have never purchased their home. I feel it's a big mistake to own a mortgage that is dependent on two earners. OTOH, unless a person is earning a significant salary, it's not a good idea for only one to be working long term and living month to month.
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I don't agree that it can't be done with ONE income. The kids may not have an Xbox or Wii...and might have to play with tin cans (actually, they're steel) and sticks, but it can be done.
I agree with that. They should have never purchased their home. I feel it's a big mistake to own a mortgage that is dependent on two earners. OTOH, unless a person is earning a significant salary, it's not a good idea for only one to be working long term and living month to month.
Do you factor in savings and retirement?
Why retire? And yes, it was probably unwise to intentionally take on debt in the form of a mortgage, which is a loan of sorts. Neither a borrower or lender be.
Providing you live a healthy lifestyle, you might just live past the days where you're capable of lifting heavy boxes (or doing whatever it is you do). My grandma, for example, is capable of living (has her home, cooks, etc), but she's not able to work at 92. It happens.
Then there's always the possibility that something happens that renders you unable to work. Not everyone can live on the public dole when crisis arises. Some people have to plan ahead.
Providing you live a healthy lifestyle, you might just live past the days where you're capable of lifting heavy boxes (or doing whatever it is you do). My grandma, for example, is capable of living (has her home, cooks, etc), but she's not able to work at 92. It happens.
Then there's always the possibility that something happens that renders you unable to work. Not everyone can live on the public dole when crisis arises. Some people have to plan ahead.
And when I can no longer work, it will be time to do the honorable thing. Retirement by Smith and Wesson.
Yes, I did make assumptions from what you had posted. I think I am right based on your response. I stand by my post on pity for your husband. And if you do not like be categorized in that fashion than do not be a materialistic/ me first person. Heck, buy your husband the Porsche (If he really wants one) when you are doing great financially. What is the purpose of being married if you do not want to make the other happy?
Thank deity I do not have to put up with the likes of you miyu or skeet09. You give women a bad name.
I am no way materialistic but I definitely think of myself before anyone else. We as women always think of others that we neglect to take care of ourselves. How can we take care of others when we're so ragged running around trying to make others happy? I like to make my husband happy just as much as any other wife but that doesn't mean I'm going to buy him his dream $30k Nissan Murano just because he wants it. Can we afford it? Sure but we'll be eating ramen for a few years. Is eating ramen healthy? Not really.
LOL I just read this conversation to my husband and he said (again) "don't talk to these people on the internet! now you're gonna have yourself a g*d damn suicide on your hands". He's not versed with internet hyperbole.
I'd be surprised if most people are interested in suicide. Planning for the future is probably a more reasonable approach.
I would actually be interested in suicide if my future was in shambles and I could no longer work nor pay for my own existence. But then again I'm not most people.
It is actually quite noble. Better than wasting other people's tax money for a futile existence.
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Is eating ramen healthy? Not really.
