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Living together in an "un-marriage" would also detect incompatibilities.
Well, it would eliminate all the legal fees and complications involved in divorce when the incompatibilities are discovered (provided there are no children as a result of the "un-marriage.")
Wouldn't it better to figure out if there's going to be issues before marriage then after being married
Of course! That's what education and communication are for.
As a side note: there will be issues. That's a given. There are always "issues" when you put more than one human in the same house for an extended period of time.
Of course! That's what education and communication are for.
As a side note: there will be issues. That's a given. There are always "issues" when you put more than one human in the same house for an extended period of time.
I had originally wanted to wait until marriage as I thought that was what Jesus would want the most. But at 16 I had been sexually assaulted and suffered a lot of anxiety and stress from that.
Then right or wrong when I got a serious boyfriend at 18 I would get anxiety a lot from the past assault when we would be close and kissing and touching and I thought maybe I could control that anxiety by having a loving experience all the way and it might bury or control the anxiety.... I also have a bit low self-esteem at times and see him as older, better, smarter, more educated, etc...and so I didn't want to lose him....and for those two reasons I started to engage in premarital relations.
I don't know overall to be honest if that was wise or not....part of me feels like a failure, but I can't change it either as it led to two beautiful boys and marriage and we are happy so I guess it worked out.
The libido thing is...I don't know, because my husband has been more 'different' in bed...at least a little bit... over time than when we first were together if that makes sense. So....I am not sure that would have helped on strict libido grounds.
Last edited by QuakerBaker; 02-17-2023 at 05:55 AM..
Well this is an interesting topic to have on the Religion and Spirituality forum.
6 pages in by day 2. Haha.
Don't bother with any of those silly 'say something spiritual' threads where it's just tumbleweed blowing by.
Let's talk about sex LOL.
IMO sex before marriage is vital. You're going to spend the rest of your life with this person. That's a huge commitment. Or at least it should be. I'm a believer in commitment. So you should know where things lie in the bedroom. No pun intended.
Who gets married these days before having sex with the person?
Very few in westernized culture. It's a really outdated concept.
Why do you feel that it's important to know this information?
Also; if it is important to one or more partners in the prospective marriage, one would presume that they would have talked about it before marriage.
"Sexual compatibility" is a joke. If one party has a male sex organ and the other party has a female sex organ, then they are compatible.
Just practically speaking, marriage is about dying to self for the sake of the spouse. The partner with the high sex drive should be always willing to refrain from sex for the sake of the other, and the partner with the low sex drive should be always willing to engage in sex for the sake of the other.
Oh how wrong you are Mike.
Let me tell you from a woman's perspective, you are very, very wrong.
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