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Like I mentioned before, birth control can and DOES fail. While the probability of becoming pregant has been greatly reduced, it's not eliminated.
And that's just too much of a chance that some want to take.
And once again, that’s totally fine. But I would hazard a guess that extremely few people abstain from all forms premarital sex solely because they fear pregnancy or STIs. Those kinds of fears usually come with a subjective moral component disfavoring premarital sex more broadly.
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Originally Posted by Mink57
Retroactive jealousy is about having an unhealthy obsession or preoccupation with your partner's romantic past to the point of it causing you distress.
That sounds a lot like potay-toe potah-toe. Either way, the retroactively jealous type is the last person you should want as a romantic partner. So I stand by my belief that they can take a long walk off a short pier.
And once again, that’s totally fine. But I would hazard a guess that extremely few people abstain from all forms premarital sex solely because they fear pregnancy or STIs. Those kinds of fears usually come with a subjective moral component disfavoring premarital sex more broadly.
You might be right, but the OP asked, in so many words, "...what are the reasons to wait until marriage to have sex?" The OP also didn't want to hear the typical answer as, "Because God said so."
I'm only putting forth a few (there's more, believe me) practical reasons to wait.
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That sounds a lot like potay-toe potah-toe. Either way, the retroactively jealous type is the last person you should want as a romantic partner. So I stand by my belief that they can take a long walk off a short pier.
But it's not potay-toe potah-toe. Seriously, if you get a few minutes, google both terms.
Part of the problem is that retroactively jealousy often doesn't rear its ugly head until some time after marriage.
Some people simply don't want to take that chance. And since this thread is on a Christianity board, I'm sure "a few" here are against modern birth control.
Condoms are not completely reliable
Abortion is not as easy to obtain since Roe v. Wade was overturned, plus, some don't believe in abortion.
And, so believe that if pregnancy does result, they'd never want to be in a position to choose between keeping a child, or giving it up for adoption.
These reasons aren't just "Eh" for some. They're serious. And they're perfectly valid.
Again, some may not want to take that chance, especially knowing that some STI's/STD's, you can't get rid of.
Ever hear of "retro-active jealousy"? Happens more than you think, and I've seen a few marriage end because of it.
It's difficult to argue with your belief, but it that situation faced me, I'd simply say 'bye, bye'. If 2 people can't even agree on a situation like this, then she should move on.
It's difficult to argue with your belief, but it that situation faced me, I'd simply say 'bye, bye'. If 2 people can't even agree on a situation like this, then she should move on.
Point is phet, that there's more practical reasons to wait besides, "Because God says so."
Quite often, people don't talk about these issues before engaging in sex. And when and IF these situations come up, they're ill equipped to handle them.
Point is phet, that there's more practical reasons to wait besides, "Because God says so."
Quite often, people don't talk about these issues before engaging in sex. And when and IF these situations come up, they're ill equipped to handle them.
I'm not arguing that point. I'm simply saying that if 2 people can't agree on sex...go their separate ways and let one prude find another prude. Definition of prude: "A prude is a person who is described as being concerned with decorum or propriety, significantly in excess of normal prevailing standards".
But it's not potay-toe potah-toe. Seriously, if you get a few minutes, google both terms.
Part of the problem is that retroactively jealousy often doesn't rear its ugly head until some time after marriage.
I did Google it, but I think it’s naive to suggest that puritanical sex (double-)standards have nothing to do with retroactive jealousy. It’s also lousy reasoning to avoid premarital sex because your future spouse may turn into a jealous monster if they find out about it.
And once again, that’s totally fine. But I would hazard a guess that extremely few people abstain from all forms premarital sex solely because they fear pregnancy or STIs. Those kinds of fears usually come with a subjective moral component disfavoring premarital sex more broadly.
But we do exist, and some of us are even atheists.
In principle, I've never had qualms about premarital sex, for me or for any other consenting adult, but I came of age during the early years of AIDS. I never wanted children, so sex has had no procreative function in my life. Consequently, if I was going to literally risk my life just for the sake of something pleasurable, as opposed to for work, it was going to be with a man I genuinely loved and wanted to marry and spend the rest of my life with. I finally "gave in" to my first boyfriend, by which time I was in my 40's.
As it turned out, we were mutually compatible that way.
But we do exist, and some of us are even atheists.
In principle, I've never had qualms about premarital sex, for me or for any other consenting adult, but I came of age during the early years of AIDS. I never wanted children, so sex has had no procreative function in my life. Consequently, if I was going to literally risk my life just for the sake of something pleasurable, as opposed to for work, it was going to be with a man I genuinely loved and wanted to marry and spend the rest of my life with. I finally "gave in" to my first boyfriend, by which time I was in my 40's.
As it turned out, we were mutually compatible that way.
Of course you exist (and I never claimed otherwise). People just usually have different risk calculuses on having premarital sex under any circumstance when a chastity-oriented religion or other moral code is not a factor.
Of course you exist (and I never claimed otherwise). People just usually have different risk calculuses on having premarital sex under any circumstance when a chastity-oriented religion or other moral code is not a factor.
That's kind of the point of this thread, isn't it? After all, the OP wanted to know the reasons to wait for sex without the whole "God...'thing'" brought into the discussion.
Point being, that there are valid reasons to postpone sex until marriage.
Some people believe abortion is wrong, even if they don't have a religious background. And they don't want to take that chance, and/or have to make that decision. It would be wrong to believe that ANYONE who believes abortion is wrong is 'religious'. They're not.
Sex is often a 'bonding experience', especially for women. It's not as if that's hidden. Just Google it.
Some women may not want to go through that. The whole idea of 'bonding' with a man through sex, for the man to not feel that 'bonding' is a turn-off for some. Nothing to do with religion, but science.
I dunno. Some people just take sex more seriously than others, I suppose...
That's kind of the point of this thread, isn't it? After all, the OP wanted to know the reasons to wait for sex without the whole "God...'thing'" brought into the discussion.
Point being, that there are valid reasons to postpone sex until marriage.
Some people believe abortion is wrong, even if they don't have a religious background. And they don't want to take that chance, and/or have to make that decision. It would be wrong to believe that ANYONE who believes abortion is wrong is 'religious'. They're not.
Sex is often a 'bonding experience', especially for women. It's not as if that's hidden. Just Google it.
Some women may not want to go through that. The whole idea of 'bonding' with a man through sex, for the man to not feel that 'bonding' is a turn-off for some. Nothing to do with religion, but science.
I dunno. Some people just take sex more seriously than others, I suppose...
You continue to talk past me and make strawman arguments. I never said (nor would I ever suggest) that people should push themselves to have premarital sex, or any sort of sex, if it flies in the face of their inhibitions (whatever those may be).
While I find the discussion interesting, the implicit premise of this thread (trying to convince someone to have premarital sex) rubs me the wrong way accordingly. The solution is not to disrespect your partner’s boundaries but find a partner who has matching boundaries in that (not unimportant) regard.
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