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.y wife once asked me if I would remarry if she passed firts. My reply was a quick "No".
She looked puzzled so I explained that a good marriage requires a lot of work and a lot of time. Plus, the issues of heirs if the mature couple married with vastly different wealth amounts.
I told her I might develop a special "Plus One" relationship for socialization purposes and to avoid loneliness, but no second marriage.
Wife and I have been married for 47 years and I can not imagine anyone who would be as good as she is. To be real clear she is the absolutely perfect wife.
A friend, a companion and someone who has tolerated me for 47 years.
But what if she passes first? I know it is selfish of me but I hope I go first so I don't have to endure the pain but what if?
I guess I could see a companion to go to dinner with and maybe a little adventure but let's face it.... you can deny it guys but at 75 and up the bedroom frolics are pretty much a thing of the past and memories.
.y wife once asked me if I would remarry if she passed firts. My reply was a quick "No".
She looked puzzled so I explained that a good marriage requires a lot of work and a lot of time. Plus, the issues of heirs if the mature couple married with vastly different wealth amounts.
I told her I might develop a special "Plus One" relationship for socialization purposes and to avoid loneliness, but no second marriage.
Sounds like a good plan. I have not been looking for a "Plus One" but if one came along, it would be fine.
Wife and I have been married for 47 years and I can not imagine anyone who would be as good as she is. To be real clear she is the absolutely perfect wife.
A friend, a companion and someone who has tolerated me for 47 years.
But what if she passes first? I know it is selfish of me but I hope I go first so I don't have to endure the pain but what if?
I guess I could see a companion to go to dinner with and maybe a little adventure but let's face it.... you can deny it guys but at 75 and up the bedroom frolics are pretty much a thing of the past and memories.
Thst is what I intended with the term "Plus One". Applies for both widowers and widows. A companion for those social occasions which are awkward if you arrive unattached, and the occasional Dinner/Movie/ Evening Out.
My wife's verbalized fear when she asked me the question regarding remarriage, was that I would become a lonely old hermit if she passed first.
My hub is 8 years older then me. I'm a few years from 60. If he went first, I don't think I would "date". I'm also not sure if I'd look for a plus one.
My hub has a friend that lost his wife to COVID about 3 years ago, they were both 60, both in the hospital but for some reason, her body couldn't fight it. They were high school sweethearts. I was shocked when my hub told me he had a girlfriend. He was the last person I'd think that would date after such a huge loss. I have a friend (also 60) who also lost her high school sweetheart a month after my hubs friend lost his wife. Her hub had cancer, ended up having a massive stroke that killed him the night before he was going to get discharged. He was beating the cancer. I'll be shocked if she dates again.
I had an elderly neighbor who had a lady friend for over ten years. They both had their own houses, he stayed at her place six out of seven days. He would drive the hour home to check on it a few times a week when he was running errands.
His lady friend died, her daughter pretty much kicked him out of her house within a week of her death. He was carrying some of his things from her house when he tripped on the concrete step at his house. He ended up in the hospital for a week, then stayed with me a month before going back home. He lived another two or three years.
Husband is 76 and I think he'd need a wife if I died. His local relatives would not be enough social interaction or support.
If he died first would I need a partner? Well having a wife do stuff around the house would be great! Guess I'd have to find a housekeeping service because right now we split chores and cooking.
I've told him the first thing I'd do as a widow would be adopt 2 to 3 dogs, for company, exercise and protection.
Marry again? Never. Men take a lot of work and if was 80 I would not have the patience.
I've got a friend who is 83. His first wife died when he was in his middle 70s. After a year, he married again. A couple years later, she had what was supposed to be routine surgery, but after some weeks in the hospital, she also passed away. Later on he married for the third time, a little over a year ago, and so far all is well.
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