Official "Seattle Freeze" Discussion Thread (yard, retire)

[toughguy]

Originally Posted by Jenbar

Hard to say, we were in a different place in our lives. Did we lead the 'pwright lifestyle' where the whole apartment building were friends, like the TV show? No. I do think the Seattle area (city limits in particular) is fine for those who are connected already in a relationship, without kids, and focused more on a career. I think though, a large group within the population, will feel the need to move on as they have children and want to start a family... especially if they did not grow up in the area.



Then don't "suffer" through it and put me on ignore. I am only providing my opinion, and my experience.

You do a lot of judging and assuming, and I think that's part of your problem. Of me, of your neighbors, of whomever doesn't think like you....


How do you know? We are atheist, and I would gather that we are probably the only ones on our block who are... but no one makes it an issue, or a divider. We have mixed ages and incomes in this neighborhood - and that was important to me. Can I say that I have tons in common with everyone on my street? No, probably not - but not every person in your neighborhood has to be your BFF to have a nice community feel... my husband and I are surely the only people with noticeable and large tattoos on our bodies... but I kinda have grown past the need to associate with only others "like me" in highschool... I can usually find qualities in most people that make them at least worthy of communication with me... (sacasm) I am still posting to you, aren't I?



Yes, because I have children now - and I want them to have an innocent, 'keep them young as long as possible', fun and exciting childhood that they can look back on fondly... and help to make them productive, non-grumpy, compassionate adults, later in their life! I want them to feel connected to a neighborhood and community and realize the world is greater than themselves, and their little home.... is there something wrong with that?



Hence the Seattle-Freeze!!! That's the WHOLE POINT to this thread!!! Great for unsocial introverts... hard for most other personality types who value community, friendship, activity....

The thing is, I am not an "unsocial introvert". I have many friends, party all the time with them, we joke around and are loud and boisterous around each other, etc. My weekends are always booked, I have to turn down invites to things because sometimes I just want to chill with my wife and son. I am not some awkward geek that only has friends on World of Warcraft. I initiate conversations with strangers on the elevator, I make eye contact with people....Sometimes I feel like I need LESS activity becuase things just get to hectic.

I realized "insufferable" was sort of an insulting word, so I edited my post to change a few things. I actually like your posts because you have such a different take on things. It's when you start saying that things are not done the "right way" here, thats when I have to start a rant. It sounds like you are pretty much comdeming me on how I raise my child, because I am not forcing him to mingle with gramps next door.

[pwright1]

Must we limit ourselves with friends or even neighbors just because of one's age, religion, income, or lifestyle? When I was a homeowner in my old Mount Baker neighborhood one of my neighbors was a 70 year old retired japanese woman. She's a widow and has grown children. She's stylish, fun, interesting, loves jazz like me and travels the world. She always came to my parties helping out with the food and just having fun. We always talked over the fence and occassionally we would go out to lunch or dinner. My place now is not quite Leave it to Beaver but the good thing is that its a beautiful 1907 bldg. with only 9 units on a nice residential street. Here again I have great neighbors of all ages, races and backrounds some with kids some without.

[GB1]

Originally Posted by toughguy

One time one of our neighbors helped me move a bunch of yard debris with his truck. We bought him and his wife a few flowers as a thank you, because they are gardeners. After that, we haven't spoken that much. Why? Because they are a retired couple, and I am in my mid 20's.

That kinda summarizes my Northwest experience. People don't seem to want to know their neighbors unless they're similar to themselves. The only person in my building with whom I had a cordial relationship was a very old woman who would always say hello or return my greeting if we passed in the hall.

Still remember the time I left on a weeklong trip and came back to find three separate FedEx slips pasted to the front door (of the building, not of my apartment). Each was dated a couple of days apart; the oldest had been there for six days, smack in the middle of the glass front door.

No one had disturbed them, true; but in the dozens of people coming and going out that door for a week, not one had peeled off one of the stickers and put it on my mailbox 10 feet inside the door. (Including the manager, who lived right below me.)

When I've told that story to different people, it's the non-PNWers who say "That's really weird," while the PNW folk's reaction is that the neighbors were being respectful for not touching the delivery slips. I tend to the former, but it's not my culture.

Your reaction might be a good indicator as to whether you would like the social atmosphere in the PNW.

[seattlenextyear]

Wow, you guys are grasping at straws here. People don't touch your Fed-ex slips? Oh no! Everyone's a jerk. Why would you expect them to? The Fed-ex man put them on there for a reason: so you'd see them when you came home. Not whenever you decided to check your mail.

The evidence for the Seattle Freeze that you guys try to fabricate anecdotes for is weak at best.

[LookingtoLeave]

Originally Posted by seattlenextyear

Wow, you guys are grasping at straws here. People don't touch your Fed-ex slips? Oh no! Everyone's a jerk. Why would you expect them to? The Fed-ex man put them on there for a reason: so you'd see them when you came home. Not whenever you decided to check your mail.

The evidence for the Seattle Freeze that you guys try to fabricate anecdotes for is weak at best.

Yeah I have to agree with this one. Did you inform people you would be gone for a week? They may have just thought you'd be gone for a couple days and don't want to snoop. I'm by no means rude, but would feel it's not my place to disturb your notifications.

[jwb123]

It's when you start saying that things are not done the "right way" here

I don't think that I have said things there are "right" or not - it's simply "the way" things are there. Right or wrong, it's how it is there. Introverted, being right or wrong - I am not saying either way, but that's how I would define the area using one word.

Perhaps in my other post I should have said "How a community should be.... to me" however, I think that generally, most people would define "community" in those terms. I think what I, and others, describe is the "rule" with Seattle being the exception.

community - Definition from the Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary
c: an interacting population of various kinds of individuals (as species) in a common location

It sounds like you are pretty much comdeming me on how I raise my child

I have no idea on how you raise your child! This isn't the parenting forum - we have yet to go into how either of us parent. If you want to tell me specifics, you can meet me in the parenting forum and I will get all ready to judge and condemn...

I would say that I am thankful for having my children in the Seattle area, because it had exposed me to natural family living, taught me about the birth process and encouraged attachment parenting probably a lot more than other areas - so I am thankful for that education, in my early years as a parent.... but as our family has grown, and Seattle has grown... I just see it's not a fit for many families, including ours and many of the people who post here who are saying the same things ... and it was time for change.

[seattlenextyear]

Ha, you just linked to the ecological definition of community. A plant community is all of the species of plants in a given location. Its the step above population (all 1 species) and below ecosystem (include soil/environmental parameters). I'm pretty sure that everyone in your community is human, so its not really an appropriate definition, unless you're including the grass and butterflies in your backyard too.

I think you wanted b:the people with common interests living in a particular area.

[VeronikaW]

Originally Posted by robertpolyglot

I went to visit a college friend in Carlsbad in North San Diego County (sidebar: whose spouse is a jerk, and the friendship has withered) about 3 years ago. I brought my cousin from Europe. They just happened to be having a block party. There were all these picnic tables end-to-end and food that was off the Richter scale. Everybody on that street knows each other and interact quite often and their approach is wonderfully casual. To me, that's normal. Both for me and my remaining parent, we don't know most of the people who live around our residences in the PNW. To me, that's NOT normal.

I totally agree. That's the point I was trying to make, it's the connections in the neighborhoods, not in the downtown areas that are not residential.

V. =)

[jwb123]

Originally Posted by seattlenextyear

Ha, you just linked to the ecological definition of community. A plant community is all of the species of plants in a given location. Its the step above population (all 1 species) and below ecosystem (include soil/environmental parameters). I'm pretty sure that everyone in your community is human, so its not really an appropriate definition, unless you're including the grass and butterflies in your backyard too.

I think you wanted b:the people with common interests living in a particular area.

Wow, seattlenextyear, way to be relevant and add something productive to the discussion. I don't know where that link is taking you on your computer - but it takes me here :

com·mu·ni·ty Pronunciation: \kə-ˈmyü-nə-tē\ Function: noun Inflected Form(s): plural com·mu·ni·ties Usage: often attributive Etymology: Middle English comunete, from Anglo-French communité, from Latin communitat-, communitas, from communis Date: 14th century 1: a unified body of individuals: as a: state, commonwealth b: the people with common interests living in a particular area; broadly : the area itself <the problems of a large community> c: an interacting population of various kinds of individuals (as species) in a common location d: a group of people with a common characteristic or interest living together within a larger society <a community of retired persons> e: a group linked by a common policy f: a body of persons or nations having a common history or common social, economic, and political interests <the international community> g: a body of persons of common and especially professional interests scattered through a larger society <the academic community> 2: society at large3 a: joint ownership or participation <community of goods> b: common character : likeness <community of interests> c: social activity : fellowship d: a social state or condition

Maybe you should run an antivirus check.

Wait, I am sure that you are aware the term "species" can apply to the human race, yes?

If not, here's another link for you...

species - definition of species by the Free Online Dictionary, Thesaurus and Encyclopedia.

[SIZE=3]spe·cies[/SIZE] (spshz, -sz) n. pl. species 1. Biology a. A fundamental category of taxonomic classification, ranking below a genus or subgenus and consisting of related organisms capable of interbreeding. See Table at taxonomy.
b. An organism belonging to such a category, represented in binomial nomenclature by an uncapitalized Latin adjective or noun following a capitalized genus name, as in Ananas comosus, the pineapple, and Equus caballus, the horse.

2. Logic A class of individuals or objects grouped by virtue of their common attributes and assigned a common name; a division subordinate to a genus.
3. a. A kind, variety, or type: "No species of performing artist is as self-critical as a dancer" Susan Sontag.
b. The human race; humankind.

4. Roman Catholic Church a. The outward appearance or form of the Eucharistic elements that is retained after their consecration.
b. Either of the consecrated elements of the Eucharist.

5. Obsolete a. An outward form or appearance.
b. Specie.

[seattlenextyear]

Wow, really. Nice. I'm just mentioning that you picked the wrong definition from the list.

Thanks for the lesson in Biology. I needed it, seeing as how I'm an ecologist.