We Should Do Something About Illegal Aliens!
Several days ago, I got into a conversation with my friend about aliens and whether or not they should be allowed to come here. At first, the casual conversation led to a few minor quibbles but before long we were embroiled in one of the most heated and fiercest arguments we'd ever been in. This, might I add, was only a small representation of the same kind of argument people all over the country have been having for years.
His argument was that aliens could be directly blamed for numerous crimes including kidnapping, rape, and perhaps even murder. He also made a less compelling argument that the more of them we allow to come to the U.S., the greater our economy will suffer. As I pointed out to him, there is no directly tangible link to pinpoint an increase in aliens as directly affecting our economy. I also pointed out to him that the majority of claims in regards to the most serious of charges - kidnapping, rape, and possibly murder - were always sketchy and never seemed to give proper representation of the defendant often due to language barrier problems.
My opinions stood firm until I saw an old episode of Unsolved Mysteries. As I watched this stunning real-life documentary, I began to feel creepy, almost insipid about myself for ever having supported illegal aliens in the first place. Since the 1940's, credible witness after credible witness has stood up to testify how they were abducted by said aliens and subsequently molested. Some people even claim to have been anally penetrated with some sort of probe. Others insist they were strapped down and forced to have sexual intercourse.
After watching the show, I realized that interstellar molestation and rape is a growing epidemic and illegal aliens are solely to blame for this problem. I began to think very deeply about all the likely scenarios and what should be done to the aliens we catch who are here illegally. There are several issues at stake which need to be addressed.
First and foremost is how to treat aliens we capture after they have committed a crime. Should our Earthly dollars fund their trial? What kind of punishment is considered a 'humane' punishment since these aliens aren't even human? I often think we should resort back to Hammurabi's Code in these matters. If an alien sticks an anal probe in one of our citizens, we should stick an anal probe in them. If they decide to rape a human, we should rape an alien. The only way to effectively get our message across to these insipid beings is to go tit-for-tat with them to reciprocate the same vicious crimes they've committed against us.
Another problem we have is what we should do when we find an alien here illegally. Should we use our tax dollars to ship them back to their home planet? I think not. The sheer magnitude of expense in sending an illegal back to their home planet far outweighs the benefit of doing so. We don't currently have the technology to send a manned mission to Mars much less thirty-seven million light years away. To develop such a technology and utilize it every time we catch an illegal alien in our country, which is quite often, would break the world economy. Is imprisonment a viable option? What if the aliens can walk through walls or teleport themselves? How on Earth would we contain such elusive creatures? I propose to have them shot on sight. Though I'm unsure as to the effect a bullet may have on an alien, I presume that since they are organic creatures, something should definitely do enough damage to their bodies to warrant them "dead."
Another thing that crossed my mind is the severity of the alien attacks. After watching Unsolved Mysteries, I decided to study the whole of the current alien invasion phenomenon that's been happening throughout the world. I stumbled across another documentary film called Predator where an illegal alien came to Earth strictly for the purpose of hunting down and killing humans. Thankfully, the Governor of California was able to dismantle this horrendous being and defeat him at his own game.
I also found out that my friend was right about their influence on the economy. Not only does their trial, treatment, and possible expulsion from our solar system come at an enormous cost to Earthlings, but I found out they've also been hard at work in our crops and fields. Numerous farmers from around the world have shown ghastly destruction to their livelihoods as crop circle appearances have grown over the years. Not only are the aliens coming to Earth and molesting our citizens; they are also doing more damage to our crops than the weevil or a plague of locusts. To rape one of our citizens is a serious crime in itself but to maliciously plunder and attack our food supply is another matter altogether. These aliens must be stopped!
Thus far, I have been able to come to only a few conclusions as to how to prevent these aliens from getting here. The best proposition I can come up with is that we build a fence around the entire planet. We can man it with cameras, camouflaged agents, and booby traps to keep any possible illegal aliens from coming here. If they want to make contact with us, they're going to have to go through a series of authentication processes with an overwhelming amount of bureaucratic paperwork attached to it. If they think thirty-seven million light years was a long way to travel just to get here, wait until they run into the bureaucratic nightmare that is our Department of Homeland Security and Immigration!
It's only a matter of time before these aliens move their sexual fetishes to people other than rednecks, trailer trash, and hillbillies. Are we prepared as a nation and as a united community of Earthlings to do what is necessary to stop these aliens from coming here illegally and raping you, me, or other common citizens? Are we ready for the impending invasion of these monsters? Shouldn't we take a stand against these horrible beings and shoot on sight? After our planetary fence is built, we will have nothing to fear, but until then I think we should lock and load and get ready to fight these intergalactic sexual predators!
His argument was that aliens could be directly blamed for numerous crimes including kidnapping, rape, and perhaps even murder. He also made a less compelling argument that the more of them we allow to come to the U.S., the greater our economy will suffer. As I pointed out to him, there is no directly tangible link to pinpoint an increase in aliens as directly affecting our economy. I also pointed out to him that the majority of claims in regards to the most serious of charges - kidnapping, rape, and possibly murder - were always sketchy and never seemed to give proper representation of the defendant often due to language barrier problems.
My opinions stood firm until I saw an old episode of Unsolved Mysteries. As I watched this stunning real-life documentary, I began to feel creepy, almost insipid about myself for ever having supported illegal aliens in the first place. Since the 1940's, credible witness after credible witness has stood up to testify how they were abducted by said aliens and subsequently molested. Some people even claim to have been anally penetrated with some sort of probe. Others insist they were strapped down and forced to have sexual intercourse.
After watching the show, I realized that interstellar molestation and rape is a growing epidemic and illegal aliens are solely to blame for this problem. I began to think very deeply about all the likely scenarios and what should be done to the aliens we catch who are here illegally. There are several issues at stake which need to be addressed.
First and foremost is how to treat aliens we capture after they have committed a crime. Should our Earthly dollars fund their trial? What kind of punishment is considered a 'humane' punishment since these aliens aren't even human? I often think we should resort back to Hammurabi's Code in these matters. If an alien sticks an anal probe in one of our citizens, we should stick an anal probe in them. If they decide to rape a human, we should rape an alien. The only way to effectively get our message across to these insipid beings is to go tit-for-tat with them to reciprocate the same vicious crimes they've committed against us.
Another problem we have is what we should do when we find an alien here illegally. Should we use our tax dollars to ship them back to their home planet? I think not. The sheer magnitude of expense in sending an illegal back to their home planet far outweighs the benefit of doing so. We don't currently have the technology to send a manned mission to Mars much less thirty-seven million light years away. To develop such a technology and utilize it every time we catch an illegal alien in our country, which is quite often, would break the world economy. Is imprisonment a viable option? What if the aliens can walk through walls or teleport themselves? How on Earth would we contain such elusive creatures? I propose to have them shot on sight. Though I'm unsure as to the effect a bullet may have on an alien, I presume that since they are organic creatures, something should definitely do enough damage to their bodies to warrant them "dead."
Another thing that crossed my mind is the severity of the alien attacks. After watching Unsolved Mysteries, I decided to study the whole of the current alien invasion phenomenon that's been happening throughout the world. I stumbled across another documentary film called Predator where an illegal alien came to Earth strictly for the purpose of hunting down and killing humans. Thankfully, the Governor of California was able to dismantle this horrendous being and defeat him at his own game.
I also found out that my friend was right about their influence on the economy. Not only does their trial, treatment, and possible expulsion from our solar system come at an enormous cost to Earthlings, but I found out they've also been hard at work in our crops and fields. Numerous farmers from around the world have shown ghastly destruction to their livelihoods as crop circle appearances have grown over the years. Not only are the aliens coming to Earth and molesting our citizens; they are also doing more damage to our crops than the weevil or a plague of locusts. To rape one of our citizens is a serious crime in itself but to maliciously plunder and attack our food supply is another matter altogether. These aliens must be stopped!
Thus far, I have been able to come to only a few conclusions as to how to prevent these aliens from getting here. The best proposition I can come up with is that we build a fence around the entire planet. We can man it with cameras, camouflaged agents, and booby traps to keep any possible illegal aliens from coming here. If they want to make contact with us, they're going to have to go through a series of authentication processes with an overwhelming amount of bureaucratic paperwork attached to it. If they think thirty-seven million light years was a long way to travel just to get here, wait until they run into the bureaucratic nightmare that is our Department of Homeland Security and Immigration!
It's only a matter of time before these aliens move their sexual fetishes to people other than rednecks, trailer trash, and hillbillies. Are we prepared as a nation and as a united community of Earthlings to do what is necessary to stop these aliens from coming here illegally and raping you, me, or other common citizens? Are we ready for the impending invasion of these monsters? Shouldn't we take a stand against these horrible beings and shoot on sight? After our planetary fence is built, we will have nothing to fear, but until then I think we should lock and load and get ready to fight these intergalactic sexual predators!
Total Comments 6
Comments
-
it makes sense. I have known some illegal mexicans for years and my lack of friends and desire to make new friends allowed me to bond emotionally with them even though our communication wasnt very good. i met one guy from Toluca Mexico and found out through him that the country that he is from, and the exact location which he grew up has certain beliefs and practices that is totally alien with what i have learned here in the United States. He beat his wife and made her miscarry and never served one day in jail. he mentally abused his whole family, everyone was terrified of him. I didnt this all out until it was too late for me. He and i knew each other for 2 years and lived together for 1 year. I now suffer emotionally from the physical abuse and mental abuse. I endured alot from this man. I did go to the police finally and he was deported, and he still makes me believe that I should not have had him arrested and deported, he still emotionall controls my mind to make me think that I should have just let him work in the U.S.A at both his high paying jobs and make money while he degraded me and beat me. He makes me feel guilty that I took away his life here on U.S soil. He told me when I last talked to him that he will return, that he needs the money that he used to make here, but he assured me that he doesnt want anything to do with me. So I guess he will search for his next victim when he returns, UNLESS we can prevent him for coming back. He is very cunning and dangerous, he dated alot of the young waitresses that worked with him at the restaurant he was employed at. He does have the capability of murder. And I would hate to hear a story someday that he killed someone. To him..America is just something to use for his means of survival. and American women are something to use to get his rocks off by degrading and beating them senseless.Posted 02-14-2010 at 06:18 AM by bonolarryedge
-
That's an interesting story but I'm talking about space aliens... What are you talking about???Posted 02-14-2010 at 01:13 PM by GCSTroop
-
Siriously?!?!
Fist of all, who are you to say that illegal aliens are not human?!
Do they not breathe and eat like you do? They come here to better themselves and to create a better future for their families. How does that make them criminals? I'm not going to act clueless and say that all immigrants are saints, but no one has the right to say that they're all the same. Every race has different types of people. Think about what you say before you decide to open your stupid mouth. The parents that immigrate to the U.S. are thinking about their children not who they're going to harm while they're here. Their economy is HORRIBLE. They don't have much drinkable water, electricity is considered a gift to the ones who have it, and many children walk around the streets bare-foot starving and hoping that they will have a decent meal one of these days. What the hell would YOU do if your child was suffering of hunger and you knew there was a place where you could offer them the best?!?! Everyone has the right to a bright future no matter where they're from and where they desire to get it. I myself do not believe in the god that most of you believe in, but didn't he create human beings so they could love one another and help each-other....? People like you are bringing this miserable world to more misery. You inflict pain to innocent people by calling them names and blaming them for you own mistakes. If I had the power in me to get rid of every single ignoramus person like you, I wouldn't think twice of doing so.Posted 02-15-2010 at 01:13 PM by Mexicana
-
wow..I agree with alot of stuff being as i have had to "deal" with this problem personally and i dont want to go into details. but the way you put this out there kinda made u look a little cookoo... I mean I thought u were talking about illegal immigrants at first, then I thought u were actually talking about the UFO type aliens in the movies then back to the real human immigrants again..ummm so I dont think execution is the answer God made the world for everybody not one piece of land for one race and one piece of land for another. But proper documentation for each person in the u.s is needed so when there is a crime committed its possible to find the person who committed it...but I have to say not only illegals have raped but very legal and prominent people have raped and are doing it now. we need to fight that battle and quit letting these damn molesters and rapests out the jail!!!Posted 02-25-2011 at 10:00 AM by mommaknowsbest
-
Alright... I'm going to explain this so that everyone understands. This is a satire of the frame of thought people have towards illegal aliens (of the human type). The narrator is indeed a little off his rocker and thinks "illegal aliens" means little green men from outer space. He ends up taking the same hard-line stance that many ultra-conservative people have in this country (that aliens aren't human and don't need to be treated as human). Thus, the narrative is meant to show both the absurdity of some of the illegal immigration controversy as well as the cruel approach people have towards viewing some of their fellow human beings.
Somehow or another, people keep writing comments as though I was absolutely serious about little green men, these barbaric thoughts towards them (or other humans), and that I am some sort of monster. This is a satire, people. My true feelings are buried within the irony of the narrators statements.Posted 02-27-2011 at 02:03 PM by GCSTroop
-
in reply to your reply
"You inflict pain to innocent people by calling them names and blaming them for you own mistakes. If I had the power in me to get rid of every single ignoramus person like you, I wouldn't think twice of doing so."
This is the type of comment I would expect from an illegal immigrant or the ones whom harbor them in America. The truth of the matter is the expense these illegals come with in crowding schools hospital's and medical rooms across this country. Legal immigration allows a country to build an infrastructure based upon numbers of some accuracy to help these people integrate smoothly. More schools more Spanish speaking teachers more hospitals and clinic's equipped with Spanish speaking nurses. It's unfortunate, but, we also have to design courts and jails around the criminal activity and the increase's in workloads our courts are faced with. Unfortunately there is not a tip jar at the border crossing paying for the additional cost of providing public services to the 20+ million whom choose to send there illegal incomes back to Mexico to help pay for the electricity and food you say the Mexicans don't have. The last Illegal I spoke to said "When I am deported to Mexico, I take a job running guns and money across the border to earn the money for a Coyote to smuggle me back across the border. He chooses to leave the Family for his better life not theirs!Posted 10-25-2011 at 11:23 AM by srgrimes
