Sacred tribes,love and clutter,flights of fancy
Well read some studies on some tribal Africans they want to diagnose as adhd,reading it felt worse than the very worst colonialism I could encounter,the colonisation of mind.Can you imagine sacred age old tribes in successive harmony for hundreds of years suddenly downing adderall it's intuitively as vile as seeing them drink Fanta.All this oppression of people of spirit, seems like hyper rationalism from the west is invading everything even sacred tribes and I can't escape it.I worry that they even allowed mental health researchers into these tribal communities haven't they already seen the deep trouble western ideas have brought.
I think of the African tribal village my father grew up in before western concepts got in,it was peaceful,no crime,no alcoholism,farming communities,ritual,dance,poetry,songs,beading elaborate costumes and women building beautiful rondevels,that's how my great grandmothers lived.The traders came,western ways came and it all went to hell, and now is rife with crime and problems and yet they still want to inflict concepts like adhd and the rest on tribal cultures and marr them with the same utter sickness that marks our society of suicides and self harmers.Wish they'd leave sacred tribes alone.
Anyway I reflected all morning on hyper rationalism in the west the complete obsession with order,logic and reason.I argued with some boy that the world needs the chaotic energy of some people that we diagnose as adhd.What was his answer there is no such thing as chaotic energy,how can we even measure that he asked?Everything is about measure and rule,order and exactitude in the west to a stifling and scary degree,everything has to be reduced and quantified.I have never seen the wild and the spiritual so extinguished as in our times.I battle it as a person who is half tribal.I don't feel I belong here.
To be honest I don't like all this immersion in real world issues,it seems more overwhelming than I can bear.I suspect that I wouldn't be delving into any of it if I could still go on my wild flights of fancy - my phantasms and yearnings of cottages and antiquated love stories,pancakes,tea,legends,and much prettier and fussier things (God I adore it!) - the romance of life like I lived for months.But since the brain damage(from meds)I can't imagine or soar like I did,things don't evoke,so here I am with the horrible climate of real life in the west and all its problems.I suppose I'm a lot like my (oma)grandmother she was always in uproar against apartheid,against every injustice.But me I love being a mellow passive little sugarplum too.Women like nature herself can be astonishingly fierce and wonderfully nuturing.
I don't want to become some fighter of the cause though, I think it's useless to try and repair a world that is like everything subject to death and rebirth,falling apart and then finding restoration.Let the world fall apart,everything unfolding as it should.I don't know that I have the will to mend the world,I don't want to get people on my side either.I understand that everyone has a different view based on their own internal nature and soul story,as well as their life journey.Its truly useless to try and bring them to your view,yet people battle it out all day trying to change people's minds.I find myself either impassioned or exhausted by such things.Mostly I prefer not being part of it.
What I'd give to answer every intellectual argument with wild poetry instead,sunward I've climbed!! I'd yell to the quantitative data and citations.Wild emotion.Oh I wish for that desperately.I want to see a lively world full of some chaos and not just order and reason.I felt in Hungary life was balanced there was this soulfulness and energy in the streets that I never feel here.
I think of the African tribal village my father grew up in before western concepts got in,it was peaceful,no crime,no alcoholism,farming communities,ritual,dance,poetry,songs,beading elaborate costumes and women building beautiful rondevels,that's how my great grandmothers lived.The traders came,western ways came and it all went to hell, and now is rife with crime and problems and yet they still want to inflict concepts like adhd and the rest on tribal cultures and marr them with the same utter sickness that marks our society of suicides and self harmers.Wish they'd leave sacred tribes alone.
Anyway I reflected all morning on hyper rationalism in the west the complete obsession with order,logic and reason.I argued with some boy that the world needs the chaotic energy of some people that we diagnose as adhd.What was his answer there is no such thing as chaotic energy,how can we even measure that he asked?Everything is about measure and rule,order and exactitude in the west to a stifling and scary degree,everything has to be reduced and quantified.I have never seen the wild and the spiritual so extinguished as in our times.I battle it as a person who is half tribal.I don't feel I belong here.
To be honest I don't like all this immersion in real world issues,it seems more overwhelming than I can bear.I suspect that I wouldn't be delving into any of it if I could still go on my wild flights of fancy - my phantasms and yearnings of cottages and antiquated love stories,pancakes,tea,legends,and much prettier and fussier things (God I adore it!) - the romance of life like I lived for months.But since the brain damage(from meds)I can't imagine or soar like I did,things don't evoke,so here I am with the horrible climate of real life in the west and all its problems.I suppose I'm a lot like my (oma)grandmother she was always in uproar against apartheid,against every injustice.But me I love being a mellow passive little sugarplum too.Women like nature herself can be astonishingly fierce and wonderfully nuturing.
I don't want to become some fighter of the cause though, I think it's useless to try and repair a world that is like everything subject to death and rebirth,falling apart and then finding restoration.Let the world fall apart,everything unfolding as it should.I don't know that I have the will to mend the world,I don't want to get people on my side either.I understand that everyone has a different view based on their own internal nature and soul story,as well as their life journey.Its truly useless to try and bring them to your view,yet people battle it out all day trying to change people's minds.I find myself either impassioned or exhausted by such things.Mostly I prefer not being part of it.
What I'd give to answer every intellectual argument with wild poetry instead,sunward I've climbed!! I'd yell to the quantitative data and citations.Wild emotion.Oh I wish for that desperately.I want to see a lively world full of some chaos and not just order and reason.I felt in Hungary life was balanced there was this soulfulness and energy in the streets that I never feel here.
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