My adopted daughter (birth mother, parents, first time, certificate)
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Our Korean adopted daughter turns 27 years old today. Every year we look up to the stars and whisper a prayer that her birth family so many miles away will somehow know she is having a beautiful life and that they made the best choice for her.
We have 2 other adopted daughters I have started this birthday tradition with. We did not want to celebrate 2 special days, birthdays and adoption days.
I'm wondering what other adoptive families do to celebrate special days like we do.
I'm wondering what other adoptive families do to celebrate special days like we do.
My good friend in HS was adopted from Columbia. Her parents got her a little gift and took her out for dinner on her adoption day. It wasn't as big as a birthday but something nice just for her. She as an only child.
I knew two boys who celebrated "dopy day" as they called it. They where brothers who where adopted to two different families who ended up working at the same water park and then learned that they where brothers. Isn't it a small world.
I think it is wonderful that you have given her a life where she can acknowledge her birth family openly and in a special way. Many times people give up a child not because they didn't want them or love them, but that they loved them enough to want them to have the best life possible. It is moms like you who make this cycle complete and loving. Thanks.
My sisters were both adopted as infants. My family celebrates their birthdays the same way we celebrate other birthdays in the family. We don't celebrate differently because they are adopted.
We have two daughters, now 6 and 8, adopted from Russia. Perhaps because my husband's sister was adopted (he was not) and his parents made efforts to never differentiate between the two of them, my husband felt pretty strongly that we do not have an adoption day every year. That doesn't mean we don't talk about it - we do, sometimes daily. We imagine what the birth mothers were like and what their birth fathers looked like and I do acknowledge the anniversaries like the first day I ever held them or on the day we flew back to the USA or the day of the court hearing, but we don't have a celebration, per se. They love hearing how I held each of them for the first time and how I felt at that moment - they never tire of these stories, so in our own way, I suppose we do have a celebration. It's just not a gift/special dinner kind of thing.
That doesn't mean we don't talk about it - we do, sometimes daily.
I think thats really nice. My adopted friend sometimes talked about her "birth mother" who she didn't know and was a teen mother in Columbia. We ended up making up elaborate stories. She also knew her birth name, which sometimes I would call her since we thought it was fun.
We only celebrate her birthday but since she came to us from Korea on New Year's Eve, we always watch the video of her arrival at the airport in Atlanta and other funny family videos. I don't think adoption day celebrations are really necessary, at least not in our family. Some people have Gotcha Day parties which is when the child came home. Personally I'm afraid that would make the child a bit anxious and seem too different, especially if there is a birth child in the family.
We have one bio baby (now 29), 27 year old from Korea and 2 daughters from Vietnam, now 8. Oh and don't forget the three "kids" from my husband's "starter marriage, all in their 40's. Last year I could say I had 7 children from 7 to 47 and people thought I was nuts. I am but that is another subject all together!
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