Why's the dating scene in Southern California so bad? (Los Angeles: find a job, cost)

[SOON2BNSURPRISE]

To the guys I would say what is it you are bringing to the table? You like looking at a girl in a nice wrapper filled with potential presents for Mr. Right. She looks hot and is looking for someone that offers her something. Before I hear about the complaints on how you can't seem to get the goods, take a long look at yourself what it is that you have to offer the fine looking woman that you can't get to out with you?

One woman that is a regular at the gym would never talk to anyone of us guys. A co worker struck up a comveration with her one day and the lady wouldn't shut up. Turns out that she was shy and it was hard for her to start a conversation. Another co worker started talking to her and ended up dating her. They were married in December.

My thoughts are just find something interesting to talk about and start that first conversation. Maybe you can become friends and who knows, you could end up over time with what you can never seem to get now.

[sll3454]

Maybe it has something to do with the kind of women you are looking at/for?

[JohnG72]

One thing about LA....you absolutely cannot get fixated on a certain woman, or certain type. Lots of LA ladies have a "type" they will date, and if you don't match that type, they won't give you the time of day.

The solution of course is to move immediately on. Lots of fish in the sea.

[Rickers]

I spent many years living in Southern California I never had lots of money but having a nice sailboat seemed to make more than a few very nice young women assume I was rich or something. I had no problem letting them use me for sex.
Finally when I wanted to settle down I had no problem finding "the girl next door" who I have been with for 14 years. If you happen to be looking for a mate, you won't have much luck if you are looking to meet women in places like bars and clubs. Try a dating service or place a personal ad in your local paper. Look really close at the ladies all around you (in your building, across the street or next-door perhaps),
The "one" for you may be closer than you think.
One thing that may work for you is, "when all else fails, try lowering your standards"

[elisaa]

Originally Posted by lrmsd

YOu know what? I used to get annoyed when I would see these threads [ie,where are the hottest women in the world? for example],but now I love it! B/C it's so much more fun than wa,wa,i need a job,i have no money and want to live in sfo on 800/month type of threads.

I do wish someone would do a reverse thread [why are the guys such d*ckheads in such and such city;or which region of the world has hotter men w/bigger d*cks?]

But,I don't think it's really in our nature as women to start such threads. Or is it? hmmm...

That said,remember how many young women move to so cal to model,make it big or see and be seen. It's to be expected. Just as many guys come to so cal for the same-and perhaps to hook up with beautiful women. There's a price to pay for that-surely you don't think it's free?

From an alternate experience: I met my husband in so cal,and he does not,sadly,have that wallet implant someone mentioned.): But he's a great guy! Native Californian and not materialistic/superficial.

Going somewhat off topic here...what are the chances of an attractive 50 + female finding a mature single wealthy male in S.C? or are they all after the young ones who want their wallets?

[Naomi Manischewitz]

25F in LA here. It is bad for me too. I seem to find men expect a woman to be extremely hot, look like a trophy wife, but isn't a trophy wife.

I have gone through the "don't look for someone and then you will find someone" stage (which is BS by the way), and stages where I make an effort to meet men (joining sports, singles events, online, etc).

The men I have BRIEFLY dated were completely flaky and made me feel as if they kept me around until a better option came. On top of it, men seemed to have overly enflated egos. Look confidence is good, but when you really think you are G-D's gift, it's beyond confidence.

Just last week I met a guy offline for a first date. It went well and he called me up for a second date for today right away (impressive). He ended up canceling on me Friday night (the night before our date), saying he is moody and needs to go to Bakersfield to do his taxes (eh he didn't know this before me??).

That's my experience. The men here are superficial, have huge egos, and are flaky. I am moving and hoping a change in location does me good dating wise.

Last month at a singles event I met my now friend. She is 26 and just moved from NYC. She was saying how she has had the same problems dating here. We agreed that the men here are very 1 dimensional and there aren't really that many types of men here. She said in NYC there was such a range of men and everyone was completely different.

[Soloinsd]

Need help dating! Women need help in socal! [url=http://www.Soloinsd.com]soloinsd.com[/url] it will give some answer of the way socal women think

[Axxlrod]

Originally Posted by elisaa

Going somewhat off topic here...what are the chances of an attractive 50 + female finding a mature single wealthy male in S.C? or are they all after the young ones who want their wallets?

I guess women are the same, despite their age.

Originally Posted by Naomi Manischewitz

25F in LA here. It is bad for me too. I seem to find men expect a woman to be extremely hot, look like a trophy wife, but isn't a trophy wife.

I have gone through the "don't look for someone and then you will find someone" stage (which is BS by the way), and stages where I make an effort to meet men (joining sports, singles events, online, etc).

The men I have BRIEFLY dated were completely flaky and made me feel as if they kept me around until a better option came. On top of it, men seemed to have overly enflated egos. Look confidence is good, but when you really think you are G-D's gift, it's beyond confidence.

Just last week I met a guy offline for a first date. It went well and he called me up for a second date for today right away (impressive). He ended up canceling on me Friday night (the night before our date), saying he is moody and needs to go to Bakersfield to do his taxes (eh he didn't know this before me??).

That's my experience. The men here are superficial, have huge egos, and are flaky. I am moving and hoping a change in location does me good dating wise.

Last month at a singles event I met my now friend. She is 26 and just moved from NYC. She was saying how she has had the same problems dating here. We agreed that the men here are very 1 dimensional and there aren't really that many types of men here. She said in NYC there was such a range of men and everyone was completely different.

You'e obviously not hot enough...

[majoun]

Originally Posted by JohnG72

One thing about LA....you absolutely cannot get fixated on a certain woman, or certain type. Lots of LA ladies have a "type" they will date, and if you don't match that type, they won't give you the time of day.

The solution of course is to move immediately on. Lots of fish in the sea.

But the fish in the sea are all different varieties of the same species.

IMO, most of the women in Southern California (with some exceptions), even in better economic times than these, are a good reason to avoid Southern California despite its good qualities in other things. There is far more hatred between the sexes in Southern California than ethnic or racial hatred.

The only upside is that LA and SoCal have drawn people from all over the world and thus you can, if lucky, find one who doesn't suffer from the symptoms described in this thread - to recap, being money-hungry lying untrustworthy slags - with which I am all too familiar with. With the current economic crisis I do not know how much longer this will last.

There are exceptions to this rule out there and count yourself lucky if you find them.

[Twinkle Toes]

Wow! It's amazing that any of our husbands tought we were "worthy" and married us!