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Apologies, as this thread = certainly not about me. It's just that Ouijee is so many lightyears from "selfish" and "fail" that I knew of no other way to convey. Having read all her posts, I know just how unselfish she (and DH) truly is and just wanted to illustrate that, and apologies for getting emotional (was thinking about Titi all weekend.)
(Also becoming more and more convinced that there is more community, and care, within Internet communities, than "the real world".)
Travel'r is so right about the sense of community on here. It is helping me. I'd much rather talk about Titi on here with others who understand.
My husband read all your responses last night and wanted me to thank all of you from him. He couldn't believe there were so many people who cared and that is helping him too. He made me promise to thank you all and I told him I would. He wanted me to share some thing special about Titi with all of you, something Titi would do with me and him. Titi would sleep between us in bed and when he wanted to get us up to give him his "cookies" he would pull the covers from our faces and gently pat us on our cheeks till we would wake up. It was such a nice feeling, waking up to Titi's face. It was such a pleasant way to be awakened in the mornings. I will forever miss that. I will forever miss my Titi.
Mew kitty used to tickle our faces with her whiskers, ever so softly. I miss that, too.
(The bandage was from a mast cell tumor she had removed. She looked goofy, but she was such a good girl about it.)
Now our big lug, Emma, just splats herself across the bed. She's not nearly as dainty as Mew was, but we love her just the same.
The first cat I had into my adult life, meaning I took her after I moved out on my own, I probably took it too far. She got ovarian cancer at 14 and I (me and my ex that also loved her) put her through surgery and chemo, (at a very huge expense....but that didn't matter at the time), the odds were almost hopeless but we wanted to do anything we could. She was our baby.
In the end she had about an extra 6 months, full of treatment that made her miserable, and it was spreading to her lungs. Who were we really doing it for? In the end we rushed her in late at night because she couldn't breathe, (I have mild asthma and I can kind of relate to how that feels in retrospect), It was time. Beyond time. I still hate it when I think of how it feels to have trouble breathing.
I've been dealing with guilt ever since, but we're not really taught to think that way, when it comes to humans we keep them on life support long after they should be...I think it's harder with our pets because we're in control, but not used to that. I still feel terrible after all this time
By the way, her name was Baby. I was 14 when I took her home, couldn't decide on a name and had an older cat, so she got called "The Baby".
Mew kitty used to tickle our faces with her whiskers, ever so softly. I miss that, too.
(The bandage was from a mast cell tumor she had removed. She looked goofy, but she was such a good girl about it.)
Now our big lug, Emma, just splats herself across the bed. She's not nearly as dainty as Mew was, but we love her just the same.
Will you share some pictures of Titi with us?
I have a picture of my ex with my past kitty that I just posted about with the same comforter! I won't post it because he's re-married (still my best friend) but it wouldn't be appropriate!
I am so very sorry. I know it is down the road, but someday you will see Titi again in Heaven, hopefully that gives you some consolation in this difficult time.
The first cat I had into my adult life, meaning I took her after I moved out on my own, I probably took it too far. She got ovarian cancer at 14 and I (me and my ex that also loved her) put her through surgery and chemo, (at a very huge expense....but that didn't matter at the time), the odds were almost hopeless but we wanted to do anything we could. She was our baby.
In the end she had about an extra 6 months, full of treatment that made her miserable, and it was spreading to her lungs. Who were we really doing it for? In the end we rushed her in late at night because she couldn't breathe, (I have mild asthma and I can kind of relate to how that feels in retrospect), It was time. Beyond time. I still hate it when I think of how it feels to have trouble breathing.
I've been dealing with guilt ever since, but we're not really taught to think that way, when it comes to humans we keep them on life support long after they should be...I think it's harder with our pets because we're in control, but not used to that. I still feel terrible after all this time
By the way, her name was Baby. I was 14 when I took her home, couldn't decide on a name and had an older cat, so she got called "The Baby".
You did your very best. God bless you for caring so much!!!
I had to take my baby to the vet to be put to sleep. I thought the tears were over but I can't even see as I type this He went down hill so quick and we found more problems with him this monday at the vet. He had lost sight in one eye and had fluid in his lungs in addition to the diabetes, kidney infection and tumor on his toe. My vet felt he might have a couple of weeks left and I brought Titi home. Last night he took a turn for the worse. His breathing became labored and I really did not think he would make it till this morning. I tried to find a vet that would do an in home euthanasia and could not find one. I didn't want his last memory to be leaving his home and being in that cold, sterile environment. That is what bothers me the most. I wanted him to die at home with his buddies and us.
I stayed up with him all night and turned on the wood stove, his favorite place. It was horrible watching him struggle to breath while waiting for the vet office to open. This is the first time I had to make the choice of euthanasia. Even though I know he's not suffering I am having trouble with this. If I can offer advice to anyone out there...don't let it go on as long as I did...I was selfish and my baby suffered and he didn't deserve that. Titi was an awesome cat and I failed him. I will not do that again. I have 4 other fur babies who need me. I need to be there for them. I put them on the backburner since Titi first got sick with the diabetes in Feb.
Thanks for listening.
So sorry for your loss. Been through that and know well what it's like.
I had to take my baby to the vet to be put to sleep. I thought the tears were over but I can't even see as I type this He went down hill so quick and we found more problems with him this monday at the vet. He had lost sight in one eye and had fluid in his lungs in addition to the diabetes, kidney infection and tumor on his toe. My vet felt he might have a couple of weeks left and I brought Titi home. Last night he took a turn for the worse. His breathing became labored and I really did not think he would make it till this morning. I tried to find a vet that would do an in home euthanasia and could not find one. I didn't want his last memory to be leaving his home and being in that cold, sterile environment. That is what bothers me the most. I wanted him to die at home with his buddies and us.
I stayed up with him all night and turned on the wood stove, his favorite place. It was horrible watching him struggle to breath while waiting for the vet office to open. This is the first time I had to make the choice of euthanasia. Even though I know he's not suffering I am having trouble with this. If I can offer advice to anyone out there...don't let it go on as long as I did...I was selfish and my baby suffered and he didn't deserve that. Titi was an awesome cat and I failed him. I will not do that again. I have 4 other fur babies who need me. I need to be there for them. I put them on the backburner since Titi first got sick with the diabetes in Feb.
Thanks for listening.
I am shedding tears for you because I know how you feel. I am older and have been through this about 15 times. In the end you did the right thing and the going downhill thing always happens just that way. One day they are still ok and have some time and the next day it is an emergency and you have to wait for an eternity for the vet. You don't sleep, you don't eat and somehow you always feel guilty because you couldn't stop the inevitable.
Just remember, the last thing your baby knew was how much you loved him. Please take comfort from that and love your remaining babies all the more because life is short and we shouldn't waste even one minute.
When the time comes again, you will do the right thing because they trust you.
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still hurting
He went down hill so quick and we found more problems with him this monday at the vet. He had lost sight in one eye and had fluid in his lungs in addition to the diabetes, kidney infection and tumor on his toe. My vet felt he might have a couple of weeks left and I brought Titi home. Last night he took a turn for the worse. His breathing became labored and I really did not think he would make it till this morning. I tried to find a vet that would do an in home euthanasia and could not find one. I didn't want his last memory to be leaving his home and being in that cold, sterile environment. That is what bothers me the most. I wanted him to die at home with his buddies and us.
