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It is not the lake of fire where unsaved people go forever and ever.
If it is, we're all in trouble!
If you read the KJV, there are four different words translated as "hell": Two of them are nothing more than the grave, and we're all going there. (Barring the Second Coming, of course.) One of them is only in reference to angels. The fourth one is the important one, and it's only aimed at saved people.
When Jesus died, his body went to the tomb, his spirit went to be with the father, and his soul went to "hell"; the grave or the abode of the dead.
As to the OP, Gehenna (one of the words translated as "hell" in the KJV and some other translations), it's a warning that is given only to saved people, and it's future. It's a very real place that Christians would want to avoid if churches still taught them that it's a real threat.
In Matthew 5:29, in the Sermon on the Mount, which was given to saved people, Jesus tells us, “And if thy right eye offend [snaring; skandalizO; causes you to stumble] thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.” Jesus wants us to take it very seriously how we look at other people.
In this verse, “hell” is not “hades”, but Gehenna. Up in Matthew 5:22, it’s “hell fire”. The original of this is “the gehennah of fire.” The word “gehenna”, commonly translated “hell”, is made up of two Hebrew words, and signifies the valley of Hinnom. This was at one point in the past a pleasant valley near Jerusalem, on the south side. A small brook ran through it and partly encompassed the city. The idolatrous Israelites, before their captivity, devoted this valley to the horrid worship of Moloch. [2 Kings 16:3: “But he walked in the way of the kings of Israel, yea, and made his son to pass through the fire, according to the abominations of the heathen, whom the LORD cast out from before the children of Israel. 2 Chronicles 28:3: “Moreover he burnt incense in the valley of the son of Hinnom, and burnt his children in the fire, after the abominations of the heathen whom the LORD had cast out before the children of Israel.]
In that worship, the idol of Moloch, which was of brass, and was adorned with a royal crown; it had the head of a calf, and its arms extended as if to embrace anyone and everyone. When they offered children to him they heated the statue from within by a huge fire, and when it was burning hot they put the child into his arms, where it was soon consumed by the heat. In order that the cries of the children might not be heard, they made a lot of noise with drums and other instruments and danced about the idol. [What a picture!] These drums were called “toph”, and therefore a common name of the place was Tophet. [Jeremiah 7:31-32: And they have built the high places of Tophet, which is in the valley of the son of Hinnom, to burn their sons and their daughters in the fire; which I commanded them not, neither came it into my heart. Therefore, behold, the days come, saith the LORD, that it shall no more be called Tophet, nor the valley of the son of Hinnom, but the valley of slaughter: for they shall bury in Tophet, till there be no place.]
After the return of the Jews from captivity, this place was held in such abhorrence that, by the example of Josiah in 2 Kings 23:10, it was made the place where to throw all the dead carcasses and filth of the city, and was quite often the place of public executions. It became extremely offensive; the sight was quite horrid; the air was polluted and full of pestilence; and it was necessary to keep fires continually burning there. The extreme loathsomeness of the place; the filth and putrefaction; the corruption of the atmosphere, and the fires blazing by day and night, made it one of the most appalling things with which a Jew was acquainted. It was called the “gehenna of fire”, and was the image that the Lord often used to denote the future punishment of the wicked.
In Matthew 5:22, it denotes a degree of suffering higher than the punishment inflicted by the Sanhedrin, and the whole verse means, “He that hates his brother without a cause is guilty of a violation of the sixth commandment, and shall be punished with a severity similar to that inflicted by the court of judgment. He that shall suffer his passions to transport him still further, so that he shall make his brother an object of derision and contempt, shall be exposed to more severe punishment, corresponding to that which the Sanhedrin (council) inflicts. But he who shall load his brother with odious appellations and abusive language shall incur the severest degree of punishment, represented by being burned alive in the horrid and awful valley of Hinnom.” Pretty severe stuff, and it’s based on what’s in the heart.
It doesn't mean that one can become unsaved; only that saved people are accountable.
But, modern Christianity has confused this with "the lake of fire forever and ever" that is the threat to unsaved people, so have determined that those who are born from above can become unborn.
Quoting from what you say that your professor believes : "hell is when we deliberately choose to seperate ourselves from God and the torments we suffer in our daily lives"
This should not be difficult to study. Simply use scientific methodology to put the question to a large cohort of non theists who have effected the god separation for themselves, and lived it for some time, in order to arrive at any torments suffered by them related to their god separation.
Hell is having no hope. The denizens of hell already have given up hope, to them the only escape from hell on earth is through death.
If you want to find out what hell truly is you should talk to people who suffer from a bipolar disorder.
--But if she had to imagine what it "is" she would agree with the above, but would add that whether it be psychological, physical, or spiritual, "hell" is:
How can you be alienated from yourself if you don't recognise the 'self' (read: the ego)?
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The denizens of hell already have given up hope, to them the only escape from hell on earth is through death.
How can you be alienated from yourself if you don't recognise the 'self' (read: the ego)?
