[jchoeffler]

Hello Mariadbd
Thanks for both your posts and thoughtful insight!! We will for sure check out the areas you suggest..we are foodies as well!!

Thanks again.

[tryingtomakeitinCT]

Please OP...whatever you do stay away from New Haven. It is very bad there crime wise and getting worse. But if you come to CT I would recommend visiting a vast majority of towns to get a feel for the "vibe" of it. Also, do a youtube (for posted news reports on towns) and a google search on the towns you are interested in and see what comes up.

Personally I would recommend West Hartford. If you want to be close to the beach then I would recommend Niantic/East Lyme.

Outside of CT, in case you visit and dont find anything...I noticed you stated you were from MA, have you considered Northhampton? In my opinion, it is more culturally diverse, more artistic and has a lot of great places to eat. I personally love it there...being in Eastern CT I often take day trips there. Have you looked into Burlington, VT? That's also a great town.

Good luck with whatever you decide!

[jchoeffler]

Tryingtomakeitinct

Thanks for the imput. I was actually surprised that West Hartford had not been mentioned. I just went on to the Raveis website to look at some listings, and I found out why.....the taxes look like NJ! 10,000 on a 400K condo. Yikes...

[jchoeffler]

Can anyone share their thoughts about Southbury for a professional gay couple to live in? Is it a "tollerant" town?

[basehead617]

Originally Posted by jchoeffler

Can anyone share their thoughts about Southbury for a professional gay couple to live in? Is it a "tollerant" town?

Southbury is one of the oldest, if not the oldest, towns in Connecticut as far as median age. I think you would find this to be on the 'cons' side as far as tolerance of people being gay.

On the other hand, in general people live on large lots and keep to themselves - so the chances of having to deal with any outright prejudice may not be very great.

As someone who grew up there, though, I'd say it tends to be pretty traditional. I'm sure if the parents in the area knew a house was that of a gay couple, they'd be wary of their kids hanging around there unattended. Sad but true.

All the gay people I know who grew up in the town did not come out until leaving the area.. Take from that what you will.

I'm not trying to unfairly paint an entire town with the same brush, but from my experience (living there for a total of 20 years), I'd say it's not a good bet for you!

[laulob]

Originally Posted by basehead617

Southbury is one of the oldest, if not the oldest, towns in Connecticut as far as median age. I think you would find this to be on the 'cons' side as far as tolerance of people being gay.

On the other hand, in general people live on large lots and keep to themselves - so the chances of having to deal with any outright prejudice may not be very great.

As someone who grew up there, though, I'd say it tends to be pretty traditional. I'm sure if the parents in the area knew a house was that of a gay couple, they'd be wary of their kids hanging around there unattended. Sad but true.

All the gay people I know who grew up in the town did not come out until leaving the area.. Take from that what you will.

I'm not trying to unfairly paint an entire town with the same brush, but from my experience (living there for a total of 20 years), I'd say it's not a good bet for you!

I completely disagree. I know a few gay couples in Southbury and none have ever had issues. It is right next to Woodbury which has a quite a large gay population (relatively). Southbury is an educated community and I feel that the more educated the more tolerant. People not coming out until they have grown and left high school is a completely separate issue that has nothing to do with the community.

[JViello]

Originally Posted by laulob

Southbury is an educated community and I feel that the more educated the more tolerant.

I really hope you are not saying those who disapprove of a certain lifestyle are "less educated" as a constant?

Because I can assure you there are complete dumb asses out there who are "tolerant" (Think high school drop out with tattoos up to her ears, pierced everything working at 7-11 and couldn't point out Kansas on a map) and I know some veeeery educated people who disagree with it. (Certain psychologists etc.)

Me? I simply believe in freedom. Do what you want, and don't force your views on me and my family, we have our own. If that makes me less educated...well, I know better.

[laulob]

Originally Posted by JViello

I really hope you are not saying those who disapprove of a certain lifestyle are "less educated" as a constant?

Because I can assure you there are complete dumb asses out there who are "tolerant" (Think high school drop out with tattoos up to her ears, pierced everything working at 7-11 and couldn't point out Kansas on a map) and I know some veeeery educated people who disagree with it. (Certain psychologists etc.)

Me? I simply believe in freedom. Do what you want, and don't force your views on me and my family, we have our own. If that makes me less educated...well, I know better.

No you're saying that. There is a big difference between disapproving of a lifestyle and being intolerant. Intolerant is taking your disapproval a step further and acting on it. And yes I am saying that those that act on their views by shunning, comments, violence etc are usually uneducated, or at least insulated from the world around them in some ways. Those that agree to disagree and can treat others with respect no matter what their beliefs are usually more highly educated and at least more aware of the world around them.

[JViello]

Originally Posted by laulob

No you're saying that. There is a big difference between disapproving of a lifestyle and being intolerant. Intolerant is taking your disapproval a step further and acting on it. And yes I am saying that those that act on their views by shunning, comments, violence etc are usually uneducated, or at least insulated from the world around them in some ways. Those that agree to disagree and can treat others with respect no matter what their beliefs are usually more highly educated and at least more aware of the world around them.

Intolerant is simply "not tolerating" something. How you get a default action out of that is a mystery.

But since we are talking actions...would that also include say, lobbying for changed legislation and laws? I mean it's acting on your intolerance right? Such as legislation that uses public schools to further a controversial subject and invades and undermines private life and beliefs?

Freedom means freedom. Period. You want to marry, go ahead, but don't expect me to want to hear about same sex anatomy being taught in public schools. (Or hetero for that matter.) It's a private matter.

Then again, I wouldn't expect those "educated" "tolerant" people to be "more aware of the world around them" and respect individual rights. Maybe they just need more "education" about the subject.

[laulob]

Originally Posted by JViello

Intolerant is simply "not tolerating" something. How you get a default action out of that is a mystery.

But since we are talking actions...would that also include say, lobbying for changed legislation and laws? I mean it's acting on your intolerance right? Such as legislation that uses public schools to further a controversial subject and invades and undermines private life and beliefs?

Freedom means freedom. Period. You want to marry, go ahead, but don't expect me to want to hear about same sex anatomy being taught in public schools. (Or hetero for that matter.) It's a private matter.

Then again, I wouldn't expect those "educated" "tolerant" people to be "more aware of the world around them" and respect individual rights. Maybe they just need more "education" about the subject.

Tolerate is a verb:
[SIZE=4]tol·er·ate[/SIZE]
 /[SIZE=3]ˈtɒləˌreɪt[/SIZE]/ Show Spelled[tol-uh-reyt] Show IPA
–verb (used with object), -at·ed, -at·ing. 1. to allow the existence, presence, practice, or act of without prohibition or hindrance; permit.

So yes being intolerant does imply action as well. Lobbying for legislation as you mention to me would indeed be intolerant.

Though, your example doesn't make sense -I'm reading it as you are saying that you do not like sex education being taught in school. Period. Heterosexual or homosexual. If that is what the lobbying is in reference to then what does it have to do with being tolerant of homosexuality?

Or, are you saying they should learn sex ed but homosexuality shouldn't be mentioned? That would be like someone disliking France so they teach a class about Europe and leave a big gaping hole where France should be. I would not consider that a well rounded education.