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{snip} We found out our son is allergic about 2 months ago. Now that we know our son has allergies, it is more important that we find the dog a home. The dog is still here.
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Call me crazy, but I find it interesting that as the owner and master of my home, I'm held powerless by this dog. I'm not a dog hater and I understand the bond my wife has with the dog. But, as a man, when I think about this power struggle, I have to shake my head. The dog is getting over on me. lol Silly me, I had it in my mind that humans were masters of animals and that we were placed above them.
I really don't understand this love affair people have with animals to a point where humans come second. I have researched the topic on family pets and spouses/partners who wanted to keep their pets while the other wanted to get rid of them. I was amazed at how many responses suggested that the spouse gets a divorce or that the partner should be gotten rid of instead of the dog. {snip} My wife used to let the dog sleep in her bed which ended when we got married. A dog. In the bed. Really? When did that become acceptable human behavior?
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I'm sitting here thinking to myself, when did pets have such an impact on human life to where people seriously have to consider breaking off relationships with their human spouses or partners (not my situation)? Is there some pandemic psychosis at play here? When I think about the morality of it all being a Christian, nowhere in the Bible have I read that as children we learn from our four legged-friends about compassion, as one poster suggested, or that our fury friends should be placed above a marriage or relationship. Christ was a people person. He died for human souls, not pets. I think my moral compass is still pointed in the right direction.
This may be the most excellent post about dogs, or pets, I have ever read.
Yes, sir, I could not agree with you more. It is beyond ridiculous for a person to put ANY pet over human beings in importance, ESPECIALLY their own spouse/children/close friends etc.
In fact, alluding to what you said about Christianity, I think it's a perversion and morally wrong to put an animal at a human being's level of importance. What was it that God said "are you not worth more than many sparrows?" (And of course it would be silly for someone to say "well he said SPARROWS, not DOGS or CATS." Please.) How about the section where Jesus is criticizing the one person saying "it's not proper to give the children's food to the dogs." There's the fact that He makes it clear that He puts man in dominion OVER the animals.
This is not to say that it's wrong to love a pet and love it a lot, no, of course not. However I think it IS wrong when a wife makes her husband feel like an outsider in their married-life home while the dog gets the king's seat practically in how things go, or when someone toys with the idea of having their CHILDREN deal with allergic reactions because they prioritize a dog or a cat to such an extreme.
Another point: some say "I prefer dogs because they don't judge me." Besides the fact that it's because a dog is too mentally deficient to do so, I think this speaks of such people wrongly wanting to be loved but not have anyone speak to them about the content of their life and their character. I mean, those dogs we have, those cats we have, they would love me even if I cheated on my wife or kept a stash of illegal drugs at the house, but does that make their love superior? People are SUPPOSED to hold you accountable for your recklessness if you become addicted to drugs or if you are found to be cheating on your wife.
People, though, want to live all wrong and not have anyone say anything to them about it.
Hence, their suggestion that a dog's love is somehow better.
Get rid of what rugs you can, HEPA filters/purifiers around the house, change your central air filters regularly, make sure that your ducts are clean, keep the dogs OUT of the bedrooms, make sure you're grooming your dogs sufficiently (take down the undercoat if they have them, keep them brushed and clean to minimize shedding), have your son wash his hands any time he handles the dogs...
I mean, have we had a test that shows it's the dogs for sure?
People make fun and poo poo it, but my kids were on the floor as soon as they could sit up, their bottles/nipples were sanitized ONCE (and then just washed regularly after that), and they have interacted with the dogs from day one.
It may be easier for me bc I am a physician and can step in and know when to intervene, but I am tough as nails about them getting any antibiotics...if it's unavoidable, they get natural probiotics the entire time, as well.
Too many people hold the myth that all mothers are sacred and would never deliberately harm her child. Just watch the news and you'll know this isn't true. I had severe asthma due to a dog and even after being told to get rid of the dog by an allergist, my "loving" mother refused. It makes me sick to my stomach to realize that she just watched me struggle to breathe day in and day out, year in and year out, miss tons of school, get hospitalized, and throw up from theophylline, but just couldn't bring herself to get rid of the dog. Now, as a woman in my forties, i realize that my lungs have developed irreversible obstruction and I have to be maintained on advair. It is known that constant exposure to an allergen can cause irreversible lung damage. Thanks, Mom. This is just one symptom of the emotional abuse I endured. I realize the truth now and have broken free of her. Really, a parent who chooses to keep a pet that endangers her child is really a sick person (btw- not talking about just a runny nose and eyes here, but struggling to breathe through a straw.)
When I was a child, and my mother and I were staying with her brother and his family (several states away) for an extended visit, I came down with sniffles/sneezing that wouldn't stop. My mother took me to a local doctor (I'm not sure if it was an allergist), who asked her if there was a pet in the house - my parents had a dog since before I was born. The doctor said that we shouldn't have a dog.
My mother, who greatly loved the dog, decided to wait for at least a few weeks and see if my allergy would get better, before making the decision to part with our dog. It turned out that it was the right call; my allergy disappeared in a month or so (and came back about 20 years later, when I was living on my own in a dogless apartment, and then gradually disappeared after I moved back with my folks and had dogs again). Had my allergy worsened, or I had ever struggled to breathe, and she had been able to improve my health by more vacuuming or limiting my contact with the dog, I have no doubt that my mother would have found another home for the dog. But I'm glad she decided to wait.
I also had a friend who was asthmatic as a child, with no pets in the home, and who outgrew the asthma and became a dog owner in his middle age.
Obviously, the decision is a complex one, and much depends on the severity of the allergy and how much the family is willing to do, in terms of changing their lifestyle, to accommodate the dog without endangering the child (or even if that can be done at all). I am glad that more is known now about the importance of the child-pet relationship and the management of allergies than it was a few decades.
If one owns a dog or cat, and an allergy occurs after one has taken on the pet, I feel you have an obligation, unless it is an immediately clear-cut issue that the child will incur serious harm if the pet is not removed in a week, to try to work out a routine that will allow the keeping of the pet. But if the family member's allergy worsens or becomes a threat to the person's quality of life or future health after the routines are changed and accommodations made (and a second medical opinion found), then the rehoming of the dog should, obviously, be considered.
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