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Just read that Joy is a black female. I have noticed that some black women tend to be bothered by interracial dating especially if it involves a man that isn't white with a woman that is White. Never got it as an Asian male why I should be obligated to date a Black female just because we are both minorities. I have personally been called out and questioned just by Black American women alone about dating White girls and saying that I prefer them. All of these women were young and seemed to want to get in my head about the whole White girls not being right for relationships thing. It is needless to say almost all were angered when my preferences weren't changed. One woman even started to shout at the girl I was dating and called both me and her a few nasty names right to our face.
Now most Black women I have run into have been great to hang out with and weren't bothered by me preferring White women but there is always a subset that did and I would say Joy falls into that subset.
My friends who were Black that saw me face some of the issues I did with that one woman in particular told me it has to do with the fact that your average black female is just not preferred by men of any ethnic group including black men. This results some like joy to be frustrated.
But what is your average black women, to you? Because if we're going by percentages and statistics, statistics indicate that the average black woman will marry and most likely end up with a black man. So if this is the case, how can the average black woman not be preferred by black men(when numbers indicate something much different)?
Yes there are certainly black women that are bothered by interracial dating. There are PEOPLE in general that are bothered by it. But how did you 'leap' to the conclusion that Joy is one of those women? She attacked the poster, the same way others have(that were NOT black women) and you decided to lump her into an undesirable black woman that hates interracial dating. It's these ideas that are projected onto lumps of people that cause issues in the first place. One group of black women hating on interracial dating or that struggle attracting men, does not mean much for individual black women if they don't care about IR, or struggle attracting men.
I'm sure you've also heard the stereotypes about Asian men being unattractive, short, having "small" peens, and being too feminine, and most women(even white women) not wanting to date them for those reasons. I'm sure you've also heard the stereotype(and maybe even saw it with your own two eyes) that there are asian women that would even pass up an asian male to be with a white man. Thus placing asian men in the same barrel of undesirability as you place black women. Actually it's funny, because on another forum I frequent black women and the struggles to date, or actually lumped in with Asian men for the same reason.
Now consider this:
You are an asian man that does NOT have that experience. As you've said, you've dated white women your entire life. That's who you prefer. Thus, you aren't undesirable and you don't fall into that barrel. So knowing this, do you feel frustrated when people try to tell you that you are not desirable because your an Asian man?
I'm sure you understand that for black woman like myself it is very frustrating to be stereotyped as a confrontational, hateful, anti-IR, undesirable woman. When it's not my PERSONAL truth. I don't care when black men, asian men, white men, or real any group of men, makes the decision to date whatever group of women they prefer. I've dated black men who won't date black women, or that have not dated a black woman before me. The only sense of "bothering" it might have caused in me, was when I wondered why they made the exception for me and if it was truly as genuine as they made it out to seem. I have friends who date black men only(they are white women), and my son's nanny is a white woman married to a black man. My issues with black men dating outside their race, are non-existent. And my issues(or actually lack of) with dating are less about race, and probably more comparable to what anyone goes through with dating. I have never had a problem attracting men that meet my preference and that is all that matters to me. And for that matter, I have not had an issue meeting men outside of my preference as well(that includes men of all backgrounds). As I told the same OP on another thread that he had created, I tend to attract a variety of men no matter what region I've been in, or city, or state. I cannot identify with the idea that I'm doomed as a black woman, or that I'm undesirable when my experience indicates otherwise.
My point in saying this, is that your post, I assumed was to make that particular poster feel bad about herself(just like her post probably had similar intentions for the OP) but be careful about the assumptions and ideas that you hold about a group of people. We are all individuals here, and most of us prefer to be seen that way.
Are you asking if they find them attractive or if they consider them relationship material?
These two answers aren't going to be the same.
I think there are plenty of people who find people from different ethnic/racial backgrounds attractive. Doesn't mean they'll date them.
People tend to stick with people that look a bit more like them.
Not always, but more often than not.
Also, while many people will consider dating interracially, when it comes to marriage and having children, most prefer raising a family with a partner of the same race, culture and religion. Those people would prefer to have children who are tiny younger versions of themselves. And I don't think that it's racist to want to have children who will carry on the family traditions and who look like someone in their own family. It's the universal desire for the family name to go onto the next generation.
The reason these threads turn into some men criticizing Black women is because users who have shown open opposition to interracial dating both online and in my experience real life have been mainly Black women and some White men. As for why a Black woman would care about an Asian guy dating a White girl, it could be that she is offended at the thought of a guy that isn't White at all preferring girls that are White. The negative Asian stereotypes I rarely heard while growing up and didn't hear at all until I got on the internet. Most of the negative Asian stereotypes I heard were people making fun of our accents and doing the eye shapes but that was all a joke.
I am calling it as I see. From my own experience in real life and even online, Black American women seem to hate the idea of a man that isn't White (whether he be Asian, Latino, Middle Eastern, Black, Indian, or mixed race) preferring White women. Joy's tactic of telling the whole world about how White women hate Asian men is common and I have heard it a few times from her and other posters like her. It is an attempt from her to get men from minority backgrounds to shy away from dating White women and I think it is pathetic. If you see a thread on a dating forum by a male of any race (usually asian) asking about wanting to date White girls, there will be a black female that will try to tell him about how much White women hate him.
It is just something that I have observed. In real life I have experienced it when I was asked about why I date White women. As much everyone wants to crucify White men and white people for holding prejudices, I have mainly faced issues from other minority groups for dating White women.
Also, while many people will consider dating interracially, when it comes to marriage and having children, most prefer raising a family with a partner of the same race, culture and religion. Those people would prefer to have children who are tiny younger versions of themselves. And I don't think that it's racist to want to have children who will carry on the family traditions and who look like someone in their own family. It's the universal desire for the family name to go onto the next generation.
This is also a load of bogus. People want the best mate possible. The truth is same race dating is common because of numbers and access. Your average White female has probably been around more White men her whole life than Black men. Then you bring in things like money and status and White males have more of it than other races of men in America. This does not mean a guy who is a minority that is of high status cannot marry a White female, I see it all the time and I intend to marry the woman (white) I am in a relationship with now. All these theories are pure crap.
The truth about attraction is that it is so random and just happens. A girl could say she only likes White guys and one day a Godfrey Gao looking fellow comes along who knows how to talk to women and she is hooked. I have dated a few White girls who told me that they were not open to dating minorities themselves but that didn't stop me.
The reason these threads turn into some men criticizing Black women is because users who have shown open opposition to interracial dating both online and in my experience real life have been mainly Black women and some White men. As for why a Black woman would care about an Asian guy dating a White girl, it could be that she is offended at the thought of a guy that isn't White at all preferring girls that are White. The negative Asian stereotypes I rarely heard while growing up and didn't hear at all until I got on the internet. Most of the negative Asian stereotypes I heard were people making fun of our accents and doing the eye shapes but that was all a joke.
I am calling it as I see. From my own experience in real life and even online, Black American women seem to hate the idea of a man that isn't White (whether he be Asian, Latino, Middle Eastern, Black, Indian, or mixed race) preferring White women. Joy's tactic of telling the whole world about how White women hate Asian men is common and I have heard it a few times from her and other posters like her. It is an attempt from her to get men from minority backgrounds to shy away from dating White women and I think it is pathetic. If you see a thread on a dating forum by a male of any race (usually asian) asking about wanting to date White girls, there will be a black female that will try to tell him about how much White women hate him.
It is just something that I have observed. In real life I have experienced it when I was asked about why I date White women. As much everyone wants to crucify White men and white people for holding prejudices, I have mainly faced issues from other minority groups for dating White women.
This thread is not about black women, is it? Please note the thread's title. Secondly, and I'll repeat again, black women absolutely do not care about who or what an Asian man is doing or dating. Why would they? The only reason why someone would care is if they were ardently pursuing Asian men and they were maybe rejected by one? Who knows. I can tell you this, though. Black women aren't exactly lining up to date Asian men. Sure, they won't exclude them, but statistically the number of Black women seeking Asian male partners isn't nearly as much as Black women seeking Black men and White men. The Black women I've seen in IRs are usually with White men, followed by Latino men. So, again, unless they are ardently pursuing Asian men as mates, I don't understand why random girls would pour fire and brimstone on you for dating whoever. Also, just like you like White girls, there are Asian men who have no problems dating non-White women, including black. When I had dated my boyfriend back in the early 2000s, an Asian male dating someone non-Asian, or better yet, non-White, was about as common as a unicorn sighting (btw, the people giving us the evil eye weren't black women ) but now? Pshhh, look all over the internet and you can find sites with Asian males and Black women. There is a lovely site of a Black woman married to a Japanese man, with two children, living in Japan. IRL here in Austin I have seen Asian and Hispanic.
In your quickness to attack Joy, you fail to acknowledge that it is so..many Asian guys tend to date other Asians and happily do so. Not everyone is into IR and there is a shared cultural aspect as well. I know this, because when I dated my ex, many in his circle were fellow Asians. The AM/WF isn't exactly the most common IR pairing in my area...I see far more B/W pairings. You date White women... that doesn't make you special, any more than it makes me special for dating whoever.
I'll reiterate, because your personal dating choices mean so little to anyone, especially Black people, I fail to see the validity in your claim that a random Black woman confronted you and your Caucasian sweetie. That's just a plain mind boggler, dude. Frankly, the confident Black women that I know wouldn't give a flying leap about some minority guys dating White people and you want to know why? They are either happily married/dating people of their choice. They are single (at least before marriage), without children, and have good jobs. Unlike your stereotypical caricature of Black women as angry banshees, they have a lot going on for them and their circles include a variety of people. They laugh and enjoy their lives.
BTW, I am not white, and I have had ZERO issues dating anyone regardless of race and I've dated them all. I frankly don't care who is dating who, as long as the guy I was with was with me.
The reason these threads turn into some men criticizing Black women is because users who have shown open opposition to interracial dating both online and in my experience real life have been mainly Black women and some White men. As for why a Black woman would care about an Asian guy dating a White girl, it could be that she is offended at the thought of a guy that isn't White at all preferring girls that are White. The negative Asian stereotypes I rarely heard while growing up and didn't hear at all until I got on the internet. Most of the negative Asian stereotypes I heard were people making fun of our accents and doing the eye shapes but that was all a joke.
I am calling it as I see. From my own experience in real life and even online, Black American women seem to hate the idea of a man that isn't White (whether he be Asian, Latino, Middle Eastern, Black, Indian, or mixed race) preferring White women. Joy's tactic of telling the whole world about how White women hate Asian men is common and I have heard it a few times from her and other posters like her. It is an attempt from her to get men from minority backgrounds to shy away from dating White women and I think it is pathetic. If you see a thread on a dating forum by a male of any race (usually asian) asking about wanting to date White girls, there will be a black female that will try to tell him about how much White women hate him.
It is just something that I have observed. In real life I have experienced it when I was asked about why I date White women. As much everyone wants to crucify White men and white people for holding prejudices, I have mainly faced issues from other minority groups for dating White women.
This is not my experience at all. The black women I do that have "issues" with black men who choose to date out have issues with the subset of those black men who frame their decision to date out as a function of some sort of "defect" of black women rooted in stereotypes. We do not meet to specify what those are, as they have already been well illustrated in this thread.
People like who they like. Sometimes (or a lot of the times) these preferences are rooted in stereotypes or unconscious biases about people in or out of their own group. I always have to wonder what someone's true intent or motivation is, for excessively dating outside of their ethnic group. These reasons are the basis of "criticism" someone might feel toward someone who refuses to date their own group.
Personally, without delving too deeply here, I have been all over the map on my dating "preferences." I have always maintained diverse groups of friends and found it easy to connect with people from other groups, no matter their ethnicity, religion or nationality. All of this makes no difference for me in friendships or attraction.
Where I do waiver, is 100% based on how I feel any pairing of mine would be seen to the broader world. For this I am on the fence for both intra and interracial pairings for myself.
LOL, it doesn't matter, any thread that starts on the subject of inter-dating will always veer to no one wants to date black women. I don't care if it starts off with why don't green aliens want to date blue dolphins, it will turn to because no foreign substance can tolerate black. Just the way of the universe that is called CD mentality. Mileage may vary.
I can tell you my experiences in life haven't mirrored any of what these weird cd species profess as truth about black women being bottom pickings. Though there's not a thing wrong with preference, there is something not so right when you feel a need to try and verbally annihilate an entire group of people, just because of your own limitations in life whatever those may be. I have openly admitted, when I was younger, though, I always found other groups attractive in a visual sense only, I had no interest in dating anyone other than those of my own ethnic grouping, but, I passed that stage 25 years ago and am happy for the growth. My change was due to a very persistent suitor causing me to question my own way of thinking about my thought process behind why I was limiting myself in this area. Since then I've dated some lovely men of most every culture under the rainbow and haven't regretted nearly a single experience. Have had long term relations with a few and close to marriage, (engagemnt,) as well. I'm not into the colorism thing, never have been black as midnight, light as snow, as long as he is intelligent, has a good heart, strong mind, treats others with the same respect he hopes to receive, is comfortable laughing at himself and life, when appropriate. If I were looking those rules would be the same ideals that apply for him and me always.
This is not my experience at all. The black women I do that have "issues" with black men who choose to date out have issues with the subset of those black men who frame their decision to date out as a function of some sort of "defect" of black women rooted in stereotypes. We do not meet to specify what those are, as they have already been well illustrated in this thread.
People like who they like. Sometimes (or a lot of the times) these preferences are rooted in stereotypes or unconscious biases about people in or out of their own group. I always have to wonder what someone's true intent or motivation is, for excessively dating outside of their ethnic group. These reasons are the basis of "criticism" someone might feel toward someone who refuses to date their own group.
Personally, without delving too deeply here, I have been all over the map on my dating "preferences." I have always maintained diverse groups of friends and found it easy to connect with people from other groups, no matter their ethnicity, religion or nationality. All of this makes no difference for me in friendships or attraction.
Where I do waiver, is 100% based on how I feel any pairing of mine would be seen to the broader world. For this I am on the fence for both intra and interracial pairings for myself.
No, it wasn't scientific. But I didn't create the threads for the purpose of testing racial bias. I created them because I wanted to see who people considered to be more attractive.
And not all of the threads included high-profile actresses (I don't consider Diane Kruger to be very high profile, btw). I think I even included Carly Foulkes in one of the matchups. Most people have never heard of her.
At any rate, greater celebrity doesn't always translate into greater attractiveness. There are some pics I posted of lesser known models and actresses that made people say "Where has she been hiding all my life?"
Doesn't matter. Those black girls are caliente and they definitely aren't losing any sleep over a C-D poll
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) but now? Pshhh, look all over the internet and you can find sites with Asian males and Black women. There is a lovely site of a Black woman married to a Japanese man, with two children, living in Japan. IRL here in Austin I have seen Asian and Hispanic. 
