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Another poster's thread about perceptions and appearances, got me thinking: how are you perceived based on how you dress? With my most casual wear, I might look/be perceived as a teen/young adult. With semi-casual, I look twenties. When my most polished, I appear/think to have the poise of someone in their 30s. After work, I hardly feel polished after a standard 8+ hour day. However, when I put more effort, or go beyond regular casual clothing in my free time, I notice a difference.
Yesterday, for example, I wore a coral sundress. Not only did I receive compliments at the supermarket, the barista at Starbucks more friendly than usual. I went to the drugstore in a dress and the cashier was more willing to strike a conversation with me. I think dressing sharper gets you taken more seriously. It looked something like this (except it was knee length):
I've gone to another Starbucks wearing pants on various occasions, and they've forgotten my order on at least three separate occasions (not even on a regular basis—I visit months at a time). I'm not a sloppy dresser, but perhaps I'll amp up my style a bit and wear dresses instead of jeans at that location. Maybe I'll get a better response.
Anyone can feel free to share your experiences and thoughts.
Additional questions:
Ladies: do you think wearing dresses/skirts warrants a better response?
Men: do you give special attention to women in dresses/skirts?
I am a frequent dress wearer and I definitely notice a difference in dress day vs jeans day vs yoga pants day.
On dress day way more people greet me on the street, more men open the door for me, and make sure to jump ahead so they can grab the door. I also find older people (over 50) are way nicer and friendlier as well. They smile, say hi as they pass. Basically everyone smiles and says hi.
On a jeans day the greetings are generally fellow black people or people roughly 20s to 30s.
On yoga pants day, people seem to think I am a teeny bopper and retail workers are less attentive. Less people say hi.*
There are locational differences as well. In my own city which is pretty mixed income from poor to super affluent, dress day and jeans day are pretty equivalent in terms of friendliness and attentiveness.
But on dress day in more affluent areas that are snootier, the difference is striking. The level of service I get is hugely different on dress day vs jeans day. It is suddenly like these people who might have been a bit snootier, have decided I am at their level or close enough. Without naming names, but there are certain neighborhoods and cities, particularly where black people are rare, this is extra apparent.
*my friendliness level is consistent with the amount of sleep I have not my outfit
So yes, I absolutely notice the difference. Don't get me started in how it works in the south!
I admit I agree with you.
When i go dressed in just regular slop around the house clothes,
I dont have doors opened for me , (from men or women) or my bags carried for me and so forth.
But I find that when i do dress more nicer, with coulottes, skirt, or a dress,
clerks treat me more professional, and I am helped quicker with my orders and purchases.
I am now 60 years old , and for the most part I try and look decent when I leave the house because I do like the difference in the way I am treated.
Good post! Thank you for bringing up this subject
I tend to be treated the same on any dress day, which is nobody pays me any attention, sans children who find me odd-looking apparently, since they leer. I could be in jeans, or sweats, and slouched. Or I can be dressed nicely with make-up and hair-done. No differences. In terms of how seriously I am taken, not much evidently. I'm just ugly I guess lol Clothes don't matter much.
Last edited by HappyRain; 08-18-2014 at 08:46 PM..
I tend to be treated the same on any dress day, which is nobody pays me any attention, sans children who find me odd-looking apparently, since they stare. I could be in jeans, or sweats, and slouched. Or I can be dressed nicely with make-up and hair-done. No differences. In terms of how seriously I am taken, not much evidently. I'm just ugly I guess lol Clothes don't matter much.
I've never noticed a difference, either. I have a hard time being taken seriously, even in business attire. I have a baby face, and apparently that causes people to not take me seriously. I've noticed that women who are younger than I am, but have a naturally business-like face are instantly taken seriously, no matter what they're wearing (casual vs. more formal). I came across an article a few years ago about "facial maturity", and how it generally makes a big difference career-wise if you have it or lack it. Wearing a power suit (contrary to the "dress-for-success" theory) doesn't change your facial maturity quotient.
I don't know about "being taken seriously," but when you are *properly* ( nicely - call it whatever,) dressed, you command an attention ( provided you can pull the look off.)
I don't find any particular difference between dress or pants - the main question is how it's all "put together."
I never dress like a slob. I most often wear dresses or skirts, but sometimes you can find me in shorts or jeans. People are usually pretty friendly to me. I have no idea how taken seriously equates with the friendliness of strangers.
I don't know what it means when people say "taken seriously" based upon how a oerson is dressed. That whole concept is odd to me. In talking with a person, I tend to take them seriously by how intelligent their part of the conversation is or how logical they seem. I can't think of one instance where I have deemed a person as not being serious enough based on what they were wearing.
Now if we are talking about how friendly or attentive people are when wearing certain clothing, that's a bit different. I tend to dress in clothing that accentuates my physique. I have long, shapely legs, so I wear shorter and more form fitting jeans, shorts, skirts and dresses. I have no idea if it makes people not take me seriously, nor do I particularly care. I'm a SAHM, so I don't really have to be concerned about an employer's opinion of me. And for the random stranger on the street...I can't think of a reason to care how they view me. I will say I notice quite a bit of attention from men and lots of eye rolling and dirty looks from women.
Depends on where you are at. If you come in looking for a job wearing an old tee shirt and flip flops, I am not taking you seriously.
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