[nautinancy]

Originally Posted by Singe

You know you are from (Naples) Florida when...



Celebrities, Money, Fancy Clothes, Expensive Cars,..... no big deal.

You still rock your beach parking permit (and get really excited when you are out of town and see a car that has one)

You've arrived at a restaurant or party by boat.

Laguna Beach is a spitting image of when you grew up

If you have ever decided to skim board in the road after a flood/hurricane

Every other car you pass is a BMW, Mercedes, Jag, and every several are Aston Martins and Lamborghini's

If during a category 3+ you go outside to "check things out" while the eye is passing (and head down to 13th Ave to watch the surfers)

You live less than 5 minutes away from houses that are winter homes for baseball players, millionaires/billionaires,
and other rich & famous people – but its not a big deal

Turn signals are an option.

You know not to plan anything during the summer from 3:30-5 PM . . . it WILL rain.

You go to the tanning salon even though you live on the beach or within 5 minutes of it.

A yellow light does not mean slow down, but speed up.

You or your friends who were not old enough to drive had their BMW's, Mercedes, Hummer's etc already sitting in their garage.

If skipping school consists of going to the beach for a day.

You take a weekend vacation to the Bahamas, by boat

You can name AT LEAST one (usually more) celebrities/actors/bands/singers/athletes/etc. who graduated from your high school or grew up in Naples.

When there's a freeze warning you turn on your sprinklers in the hopes of creating some ice and the simulation of a winter wonderland, but there is nearly ever a freeze warning

If you go to the beach on Christmas day

If school is canceled you all go surf right before the hurricane hits because that's when there are the best waves.

You know that anything under a Category 3 just isn't worth waking up for since school is canceled.

You were 8 before you realized they made houses without pools.

You pass on the right and honk at the elderly.

Anything under 70 is chilly.

You measure distance in minutes.

Flip-flops are everyday wear.

Shoes are for business meetings and church.

No, wait, flip-flops are good for church too, and it's totally appropriate to wear flip-flops with a nice cocktail dress.

If you can spot a tourist by their lack of Rainbows.

And when you drive up to your high school, you feel poor in your 2007 Honda because you have to park between a Mercedes and a BMW.

..even 13th birthday parties call for Hummer limos.

..when you go to a friend's house, most of the time it is spent either in the pool, or in the entertainment room...with a projector and a screen that covers the entire wall.

..you drive to Miami or Boca to shop when the stores at Coastland Center Mall don't suffice.

..you've been to the Philharmonic more than a few times, and you still hate the itchy seats

..at least 3 of your friends have dad's that are in the medical field.

..on the weekends, you don't take the car out to lunch, you take the boat.

..you get waxed, cut, and polished at the spa often...even though you might have just started puberty the year before.

You remember when Tilt and Jabberwalkie was in Coastland Mall!

Fourth of July can only mean one thing, a minimum of 8 hours chillen' at the Pier, drinking and watching the fireworks *You are most likely in your swimsuit all day.

You've never seen snow but the crushed ice at Snow Fest each year is close enough for you

You live where people vacation, duh. And someone always knows someone that has money that has visited Naples sometime before.

When you've had to dodge old people driving on the wrong side of the street....multiple times.

You've been to "Master Bait and Tackle" at least a dozen times. (You may even have the shirt)

You've been permanently blinded by fat men in Speedos – they don't even faze you anymore.

You've snuck into the pool at the Registry/Naples Beach Club/Ritz

You remember when Long's produce market/shack was on the corner of Airport/Golden Gate Pkwy.

You've attended the annual Boat Parade.

You've jumped off the Naples Pier and swam in the fountain at Waterside Shops

You went to Coastland Center mall religiously because either you had nothing else to do or because you wanted to have a reunion with everyone you've ever met.

You've hung out/skated at Fleischmann Park.

You've eaten many a time at The Clock (& you LOVE IT!)

You have sworn at the numerous Naples Police especially the ones on the motorcycle's and bicycles

You went to Gulfview, Oak Ridge, Pine Ridge Middle school &/or Golden Gate Middle School

You went to Naples, Barron, Golden Gate, Lely, Gulf Coast, Community and/or St. John Newman's High School

You have hung out at one of the several Starbucks on the corner of 5th and 41

You drove the route of 5th, 3rd, 12th and back again.


You know that Tom Cruise's mom has a house in Grey Oaks & Judge Judy's house is in Pelican Bay not to mention the many other famous people who have homes in Naples.

You have played the xylophones & on the swings at Cambier.

You frequent any of these beaches when you find time to go home:
3,4,5,7 (all the numbers North & South) Lake, The Pier, 32, 33, Seagate, Lowdermilk.

It takes you 30 minutes longer to go anywhere during season than it does during summer.

You know that once season starts, the Snowbirds will have flocked here in the thousands & you won't be eating out for the next few months.

You have used the term "Yankee GO HOME" when driving around town, since only the touristers/Northern people stop, drive slow, or almost wreck because they are admiring our landmarks.

You have gone to the Haunted House that's held in the Funeral Home.

You have almost hit someone riding his or her bike & usually it's a Spanish person (unless you're downtown and then it's an 80-year old woman on a beach cruiser)

You remember when the only thing near Hollywood 20 was the set of Storage places & the old NCH building.

You remember when the bingo hall used to be a roller rink.

You take/took day trips to Miami, Ft. Myers, Bonita, Ft. Lauderdale, Marco or Sanibel.

You live/have friends who live on the beach, a block from the beach or in Port Royal, Park Shore, or Aqualane Shores and its no big deal.

Those people usually had their own boats (separate from their parents) and jet skis too.

You have snuck into Naples Beach Club to use their pool and or chairs and to have a bar so close.

You remember when it was the 813 & the 941

You know you grew up in Naples when the mall didn't go pass JC Penney's, the food court was where Ruby Tuesday is, and Sears was only one floor.


You remember when LIVINGSTON rd. was non existant & Vanderbilt didn't have an extension.

You can remember when there was NOT a Starbucks

You can remember only having one Walmart (now there are 5!), but you still refuse to set foot in them no matter where you live.

You also remember when there was not a target – now there are 2

You can remember the Strikes and Spares (which is now an exit ramp)

You remember when the exits used to be numbers instead of miles

You have attended the Swamp Buggy Parade and/or races because you had nothing else to do

You attended the Canoe Races and still do

You rode on a boat or jet skis to Key Waden on the weekends and after school.

You threw your bowling ball down Goodlette-Frank Road after a bad game and didn't hit any cars.

Trivia: What was Dave's (Strikes and Spares manager) last name?

[StreetSmarts]

Millionaires and billionaires, Aston Martins and Lambo's? Are we talking about the same Naples? I mean, there are some, but it's not like it's that common.

[Nomadicus]

You go shopping and all the handicap places have cars in them with out of state tags.

[StreetSmarts]

Originally Posted by Nomadicus

You go shopping and all the handicap places have cars in them with out of state tags.

Oh man! Bingo!

I see it in Waterford Lakes (Orlando) a lot! Almost always present when this occurs happens to be a NJ tag and a man or woman (woman usually wearing the big bumble bee sunglasses and tight sweatpants with the words "juicy" or "Gucci" on the buttocks) talking on the cell phone (in spanish). No handicapped sticker, I guess just took it upon himself to park in a handicapped spot because he felt like it. And I would say, well, out of state tag, he'll be gone soon... but not usually the case as all these people move here or just moved here and havent changed their tag yet.

[♥♥PRINC3Ss♥♥]

Originally Posted by Drawinpasttense

You know you're from Florida when...

- When every city has a less than appealing nickname (i.e. Whorelando, Trampa, HollyHood, Fort Lickerdale, don't even get us starded on Naples or Seminole)

my favorite is Pembroke Crimes

[compelled to reply]

Originally Posted by ♥♥PRINC3Ss♥♥

my favorite is Pembroke Crimes

Borders on Hollyhood, Pooper City and Mierdamar (or Murdamar).

[♥♥PRINC3Ss♥♥]

Originally Posted by compelled to reply

Borders on Hollyhood, Pooper City and Mierdamar (or Murdamar).

forgot about Miramar

[♥♥PRINC3Ss♥♥]

You know you're from Florida when.....
you see the confederate flag flying
you pay $200 in tolls on the Turnpike
you watch the most beautiful sunsets every single day
you see swamps on sale

[Nomadicus]

You have alligators sunning on you lawn.

[StreetSmarts]

[quote=♥♥PRINC3Ss♥♥;11917903]You know you're from Florida when.....
you see the confederate flag flying HUH? I very rarely see it. Unless in the panhandle of Jax.
you pay $200 in tolls on the Turnpike Is that all?
you watch the most beautiful sunsets every single day That would dpend on what coast you live on, lol.
you see swamps on sale