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Why would you even consider someone like that a friend???
Well, I think you missed the point that they 'were' considered friends and then they - by their choice and actions - faded away and stopped being friends.
Well, I think you missed the point that they 'were' considered friends and then they - by their choice and actions - faded away and stopped being friends.
Christians don't corner the market on this sort of stupid behavior, though - not by a long shot. I've had all sorts of friends over my lifetime who I've allowed to fade away and stop being friends due to obnoxious, sanctimonious, or preachy behavior. People can get up on a soapbox for any number of things.
Just the other day, my husband and I were meeting with our contractor about our kitchen remodel. We've hired her before to do other remodel jobs in our home and we've been VERY pleased with her service. She's not a friend, per se, but we've enjoyed a friendly relationship with her and will continue to use her company as we remodel our house.
Now - my husband and I are both Christians but we are definitely NOT pushy about our faith. And with our contractor especially, we haven't even broached any topics regarding religion or politics or views on any controversial subjects. And finally, we're not prejudiced sort of people and we're also very "live and let live." We couldn't care less what consenting adults do, as long as they don't infringe on the rights of others while they're doing it.
Well, lo and behold, over lunch (and discussing the contract) our contractor suddenly, and inexplicably, began discussing how prejudiced she felt that many people are regarding gays, and how she and her female partner wanted to get married but couldn't, and how judgmental some people were and how some of her Facebook friends had unfriended her when she came out, and how people need to move into the 21st century, etc etc.
We tried to just say "Oh, that's a shame - well, it doesn't bother US," or something along that line. It was so out of context and strange that it really threw both of us. If either of us had said anything inappropriate or even ABOUT gay marriage or gays in general, I could see her feeling a need to make a stand but this was completely out of the blue.
We were both baffled - and to be honest, it sort of put us off. NOT the fact that she's gay, but the fact that for some reason unknown to us, she suddenly felt a compulsion to blurt out her sexual orientation and start talking about it. Later I told my husband, "Well, she either misconstrued something we said - or she feels really, really comfortable with us."
The last thing I was expecting to discuss while we were in the middle of talking about our kitchen remodel bid was our contractor's sexual orientation.
I don't understand the urge some people feel to discuss politics, religion or sex (or in this case, two of the three) with casual acquaintances, business acquaintances or casual friends. It smacks of drawing some sort of line, or feeling a need to categorize people or whatever.
We'll continue to use her because she's an excellent contractor, but if she continues to lobby for gay rights while she's doing our remodel, I will be less than impressed with her professional standards.
So...this sort of behavior can come from all directions. And it's rarely appropriate.
I was an Atheist and I never had problems...its very religious down here and I wore my beliefs on my sleeve...I was a militant Atheist and am still militant in my beliefs now which are close to Atheism and I have lived in the south my entire life. Living in a larger city or town you won't have as many problems if you did live in a smaller town etc...
Well, I think you missed the point that they 'were' considered friends and then they - by their choice and actions - faded away and stopped being friends.
No, I didn't miss that. I simply feel like anyone who puts more importance on their agenda than they do on my feelings is not and never was a real friend.
No, I didn't miss that. I simply feel like anyone who puts more importance on their agenda than they do on my feelings is not and never was a real friend.
Then I guess it depends on what you consider 'friends.' I've had a scale from casual acquaintances to what I would call "True Blue" friends. But I don't fool myself into thinking I know exactly where on the scale each friend really lies. I've had acquaintances stand by me in the worst of times and True Blues abandon me in the best of times. You never know.
I am an atheist and lived near Nashville (but not in Nashville) for several years after my de-conversion. As far as interacting with others, I mostly got along just fine. I did this by never telling anyone that I was an atheist. Religion was literally everywhere there, a constant reminder that I was firmly in the center of the Bible Belt. This could be annoying at times, but for me, also being quite liberal, the politics of the area bothered me much more. People there were FAR more vocal about their politics than their religion. So this was something else I kept to myself. Eventually I saw my chance to leave and did so as soon as I could, and have never looked back. I go back to visit family for Christmas and within a couple of days I'm desperate to leave again. Maybe you'll have better luck. It's a great place for some people, but a horrible match for people like me.
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