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^I'm not trans* so please don't quote me on this, but my understanding is that transitioning is sort of akin to coming out. Trans* people have to deal with the very real, very in-your-face dichotomy between their biological sex (and the cultural roles society expects that biosex to play) and their true gender identity. That's an awful way to live (ALTHOUGH there are many trans* people who choose not to transition, and that's a whole other interesting and valuable conversation). It's sooo hard to even begin to understand it from a cis perspective, so honestly the best thing we can possibly do to make it easier for the underprivileged party is to listen to them and believe them when they talk about their experiences.
Transphobia is a terrifying and pervasive phenomenon that exists in just about every community in the world other than the trans* community itself to some degree. It's just horrific and there's essentially nothing being done to combat it. Even in the traditionally open-minded & tolerant cities (Bay Area, PNW, Mpls, Chicago, Miami, BosWash), you can't really make guarantees. New York is probably top of the list just because it's so monumental and diverse, so there's a better chance of finding a healthy fit.
Trinidad CO is the worst place for a transgender! if he wants to be sexually degraded then murdered- go there. You would be amazed of the heinous crimes that town has committed with no recourse. They are organized hate crime at its worst, it is the local sport to destroy transgender persons lives permanently. Don't stop to **** or by gas in that town drive on through! Another thing some of these post are listing the worst places for transgender PERSONS to live-sinister-be careful do your research!
I went to Jack-In-The-Box yesterday and i'm pretty sure my server was a transgender. Just thought i'd say that.
Haha! Well seattle is definitely accepting of it, all ages, there is very little discrimination. And it's fairly close to Sacramento. I am not sure of the situation in sf,but it's even closer, so you wouldn't have to go far.
TG Girl Full time legal female in Houston:
WHERE can i WORK without all the b.s.?
I've endured some petty anti racist/transphobia here...
WHERE in my own home town can i work already?
WHICH cities would HIRE me and NOT screw me around??
Monica
Pissed off @ Houston
I remain Ya'lls sincerely..
Monica...
Hi Monica...as a gay male myself who has experience with travel and living in other cities I would recommend the shortlist of cities where Transgender individuals can live the closest to what many of us take for granted as a "normal lifestyle"....New York City, San Francisco or Los Angeles. Most cities are in fact LGB friendly and many confuse that with inclusiveness for Transgender as well, but sadly it is not the case. All three cities tend expensive and can be intimidating to move to, but unfortunately are the only option if you want to live/work fully within your identity.
As for Tennessee? Run for your life, and I mean it. I have as I was asualted by a drunk judge and the cops do NOTHING! Chattanooga, Cleveland, Knoxville DANGER! DANGER!
I have to agree that Eastern TN or anywhere in TN is not the best but is not the worst in the nation. Salt Lake would be worse than E TN other than small Towns E TN. Chattanooga/Knoxville (1 hour drive) is not too bad in 2014. There is North Chattanooga which is a LGBT area where you will often see same sex couples walking down the streets holding hands. Downtown is okay, East Brainerd is okay so long as not out holding hands but there are hate crime laws however; cops & judges are corrupt like most places. I dated a cop who is gay yet in the closet. Sorry to hear about you being assaulted. I'm sure that makes the entire area seem horrible to you. I'm not thrilled living here & do wish to move.
As for the question best places; sure SE FL is okay but take into account other things such as change of seasons. Does one want 9 months summer heat then an early fall type climate 3 months without the change of colors of the leaves? Vermont would be very friendly, Minneapolis is too but Duluth, MN is the most liberal City of its size in the nation. For those who like the hot weather but want a slight change of season, Dallas would be okay but in the East where it's not too cold; Asheville, NC is the most LGBT City in the east per % pop & is called the San Fran of the East Coast. Sure, Key West is more so but very tiny. Asheville is a lovely City that has four full seasons like E TN but is very friendly for LGBT without the constant snows of winter.
Various places in Cali but prices are very expensive. Buffalo NY to Syracuse is okay and winters are not so cold south of the Lakes. I felt colder in Chatta taking off to visit a friend up that way than when I got there 30* colder in lake effect because 30* in Chatta with typical light wet snows fells colder.
Good luck. I know the message is old but hope things worked out & for those who are new and curious of the topic.
I have to agree that Eastern TN or anywhere in TN is not the best but is not the worst in the nation. Salt Lake would be worse than E TN other than small Towns E TN. Chattanooga/Knoxville (1 hour drive) is not too bad in 2014. There is North Chattanooga which is a LGBT area where you will often see same sex couples walking down the streets holding hands. Downtown is okay, East Brainerd is okay so long as not out holding hands but there are hate crime laws however; cops & judges are corrupt like most places. I dated a cop who is gay yet in the closet. Sorry to hear about you being assaulted. I'm sure that makes the entire area seem horrible to you. I'm not thrilled living here & do wish to move.
As for the question best places; sure SE FL is okay but take into account other things such as change of seasons. Does one want 9 months summer heat then an early fall type climate 3 months without the change of colors of the leaves? Vermont would be very friendly, Minneapolis is too but Duluth, MN is the most liberal City of its size in the nation. For those who like the hot weather but want a slight change of season, Dallas would be okay but in the East where it's not too cold; Asheville, NC is the most LGBT City in the east per % pop & is called the San Fran of the East Coast. Sure, Key West is more so but very tiny. Asheville is a lovely City that has four full seasons like E TN but is very friendly for LGBT without the constant snows of winter.
Various places in Cali but prices are very expensive. Buffalo NY to Syracuse is okay and winters are not so cold south of the Lakes. I felt colder in Chatta taking off to visit a friend up that way than when I got there 30* colder in lake effect because 30* in Chatta with typical light wet snows fells colder.
Good luck. I know the message is old but hope things worked out & for those who are new and curious of the topic.
Quote:
Originally Posted by blaserbrad
portland
Once again there's confusion with LGB friendly and not T which is completely different in terms of living and especially working. Think about it, most if not all of these places are not going to be generally supportive of someone living/working as a Transgendered individual (especially M to F) and to suggest otherwise is somewhat irresponsible to someone in that situation.
Not every state is equal as to how it treats transgender people both in regard to health care, employment and legal issues. If your father is disabled, he might want to have an even more scrupulous look at the attitude of the state that he lives in as far as how it treats transgender individuals. In general, the more progressive the state, the more likely your father will be to have positive experiences. But there is discrimination and there will be jerks wherever you go. So living in a progressive state is not a guarantee that you will experience no discrimination. I would say, though, that there is a big factor of peace of mind in knowing that the state you live in and the overall culture of the state is favorable and positive with regard to transgender status. It could mean the difference in whether you feel safe to go out as yourself or not. Don't underestimate the basics of needing to feel safe in your choice of places to live.
Something else that could play into your father's decision is whether they pass or don't pass. If you pass, you are probably less likely to be "read" or figured out by the locals if you live in a non LGBT area than if you live in an LGBT area, strangely. If you don't pass, then you'd better darn well live in a progressive area or a metro area if you want to have peace of mind and safety.
Here's my list:
States which are generally a good pick (stick to metropolitan areas in those states usually)
Massachusetts, California, Colorado, Washington, Oregon, Northern Illinois, Wisconsin, New Hampshire, Connecticut, Pennsylvania, Vermont, New York and surprisingly Arizona and New Mexico, even though the overall politics of Southern statess more on the conservative side. There are pockets of liberal communities in other states. If you look at metropolitan areas within your state and then ask about where is the most progressive area, then you may find the area most conducive to transgender living. You say your father, but you don't specify whether they are a trans woman or a trans man. Your answer may differ depending on that. I would say that there are certain areas which have a higher settlement of trans women or trans men depending on what that area has to offer to them.
I chose Massachusetts for a number of reasons. Let me explain my rationale. Massachusetts has the biggest transgender health care facility in the nation in Fenway Health Center and refers its' patients to a Harvard teaching hospital at Beth Israel Hospital in the downtown area. The ability to get respectful transgender health care is so important when you are transgender. So many of us are afraid to go to the doctor because we've been victims of hateful behavior by health care workers of all types and education levels. Massachusetts has universal health care, so even if you are poor, you can get health care. In addition, the governor of Massachusetts has stipulated a very strong suggestion that no insurance company should discriminate against transgender people's health care. It is very likely that we will have GRS benefits here, but the legal aspect of that is still playing out. There is a lot of legal help available in the state of Massachusetts. So if you have a problem with someone harassing or discriminating against you, it is very easy to find someone to represent you. There is also free legal help for transgender people. Massachusetts has a very high cost of living, but it also has a very high rate of salary. Some areas are better than others. Some vocations are better than others. If you are in a computer related field, this is like the Silicone Valley of the East Coast. Be prepared to get local references, though. I would advise volunteering when you get here so that you get someone local who can recommend you. Or get an internship. The employment situation is tough and Massachusetts is not a place that warms up easily to outsiders. There are a lot of companies in this State that offer GRS or other transgender benefits. You can check out the HRC's Corporate Equality Index for a list of corporations that are favorable for transgender health care benefits.
The link is here [url=http://www.hrc.org/campaigns/corporate-equality-index]Corporate Equality Index | Human Rights Campaign[/url]
Cities or areas within Massachusetts which are more liberal and accepting to transgender people (although the state as a whole is very progressive):
Arlington, Somerville, Salem, Waltham, Northhampton, Newton (there's probably more).
Cost of living is high here, but less than California metro areas. The cost is totally worth my peace of mind in knowing I can be myself without fear that I'm going to be targeted.
Last edited by Xenspirit01; 09-17-2014 at 10:18 AM..
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Trans friendly Places
