Ever Have Any Regrets Of Not Going With?

[tijlover]

Anyone ever lost a loved one, and now regret it that you didn't join that person on his/her trip to the next world, holding hands? And what were some of your reasons, or the main reason, for your staying behind?

Here, in Las Vegas, over the years, I've read of, mostly, older people in murder-suicides and I oftentimes wonder if it was planned out in advance, through some strong bond of love.

I had that overwhelming temptation back in 1994, when I lost my partner, I regretted it for some time until someone else came along who's been part of my life for the past 14 years now, but now at 63, my health going south, if something should happen to him, and with my everlasting dread of dying alone, together we go! And skip that dreadful grieving/mourning process!

Next time I'll plug my ears when I hear it: You've got so much to offer the world, you've got many years ahead of you!

[Dayton Sux]

you've got many years ahead of you

...yes unfortunatly that is true.

In a way I feel im just marking time until I can be re-united with my partner.

There's a song by the folksinger the late Kate Wolf that has a lyric.

"...an unfinished life/that I find lies before me..."

I sort of feel that way. Unfinished, in that I wasnt able to grow old with my partner (or he wasnt able to grow old with me).

I do sort of wish sometimes that I will come down with some terminal illness or something more sudden like a heart attack, which would hurry up my meeting him in the great bye and bye. You do hear of this, spouses surviving their partners passing by just a few years.

But as it is, I will let nature take its course as we all will pass, in time we all will pass.

[Slithytoves]

I was engaged to a man who died unexpectedly five months before our wedding, while he was away on business for two months no less, and in the period immediately after his death I did consider joining him. I decided that he wouldn't want it that way, and that he would want me to find happiness on my own, even do some things we had planned to do together and finish some things he had been doing for himself and others. I decided there is no greater gift than sticking around to keep his memory alive in the world. Then again, I understand why people might want to join their partner in the afterlife and would not judge someone who made the decision to do so. It's your life, so in my opinion, your choice and nobody can tell you how, why or when you should end it. Provided you have identified and sought help for any mental health problems you might have, that is. Surrounding the death or otherwise.

Losing a partner leaves huge holes, but even those of us with little money or social resources can slowly fill most of them in if we really want to, at any age. Like I said, doing things for yourself or others is an excellent way to honor a memory. To the OP or anyone else here who has felt like he or she feels, I would wish you peace and a clear head for your choices, whatever they are. But yeah, I do know what that feels like.