Yes ma'am/No ma'am culture (Houston, Weir: college, living in, professionals)

[Vicman]

From the handbook of the schools of St/ Landry Parish, Louisiana https://1.cdn.edl.io/KvoN1QgCFzxgUZV...0p3qttVW5H.pdf

Students in kindergarten through grade twelve are required to exhibit appropriate conduct as required by La. R.S. 17:416.12 to address and respond to any public school district employee by using the respectful terms:
“Yes, Ma’am” and “No, Ma’am” or “Yes, Sir” and
“No, Sir,” as appropriate, or “Yes, Miss, Mrs., or
Ms. (Surname)” and “No, Miss, Mrs., or Ms.
(Surname)” or “Yes, Mr. (Surname)” and “No, Mr.
(Surname),” as appropriate, each such title to be
followed by the appropriate surname.

So it seems to be baked into Louisiana law ?!?!?!?!?!?

In high school some teachers let you drop the honorifics, or ocassionally even let people use first names if they pleased.

[nana053]

My grand children have been here in Pearland since they were in kindergarten and have never heard it used in school. They do have neighbors who use it and expect it, but not that much. They tend to expect it from their own children, but not the children of others (except maybe at church).

[Treasurevalley92]

Originally Posted by Huskies7

It isn't that it's offensive. It's more that it feels awkward and unnecessary.

Yeah and it feels stuffy and formal. You can be respectful without being overly formal. Saying Sir after everything sounds old-timey and insincere.

Mr or Mrs _______ was the norm when I was growing up. In the Mountain West. You used Maam or Sir on old people or when you were being formally polite or military-related.

"Son go clean your room" "Yes Dad" or "Yes"

"Yes Sir" sounds like you are being a smartass.

You could use it in this context:

"Excuse me sir, could you please move your car, it is blocking the driveway"

Sort of like you might use the term "Gentleman"

[latetotheparty]

Originally Posted by rbheeler

Please help me understand the objection to "sir" and "ma'am". I grew up in the deep South and it was taken for granted that we would address adults in that manner. Children in the deep South are still taught that. It is intended to demonstrate courtesy and respect. Please help me understand why this practice is so offensive to some people from other parts of the country.

I don't mean to start some sort of brawl here, I just want to understand.

same here!! I grew up in Houston and our parents taught my brother and me to use Ma'am and Sir when addressing adults....... at age 59, I still do. A simple, 1-syllable word is not that hard to use and I don't understand how people feel it awkward or stiff.... in my mind, and I imagine, many others brought up as we were, it is simple respect towards fellow human beings.


I do get surprised looks from time to time, most of which turn appreciative.......

[SanJac]

Originally Posted by Treasurevalley92

Yeah and it feels stuffy and formal. You can be respectful without being overly formal. Saying Sir after everything sounds old-timey and insincere.

Mr or Mrs _______ was the norm when I was growing up. In the Mountain West. You used Maam or Sir on old people or when you were being formally polite or military-related.

"Son go clean your room" "Yes Dad" or "Yes"

"Yes Sir" sounds like you are being a smartass.

You could use it in this context:

"Excuse me sir, could you please move your car, it is blocking the driveway"

Sort of like you might use the term "Gentleman"

Its' interesting to read the different perspectives on this. For me, using "yes sir, yes ma'am" is perfectly normal and expected. Two recent examples:

A new member of my team at work always addresses me with "yes sir" or "no sir." Coincidentally he is from Louisiana and he is in his late 20s. My first thought when he joined the team was "wow, what a respectful and polite young man!" Never would I have dreamed to associate anything negative with those terms.

At Thanksgiving Dinner my niece corrected her children (ages 10 and 7) to not say "yeah" to their grandparents but to say "yes sir and yes ma'am." Again, this was perfectly normal to me and gave me a sense of pride that she was raising her children to have good manners!

I guess it really depends on one's upbringing how these terms are perceived. I still would argue in Texas (and in Houston) this is more the norm than the exception.

[shimmy42]

Originally Posted by Huskies7

How prevalent is the yes ma'am/no ma'am culture in Houston? Or in surrounding areas like Spring, Conroe, The Woodlands, etc? Is everyone expected to use it, especially children? Are children punished in school if they don't follow up every answer with it?

i think nobody does that anymore maybe because no one got respect for each other

[DanielWayne]

Yeah it's perfectly normal conversation for me, too. Lots of people don't use it, but lots of people do. I still get ladies calling me sweetie (I'm a dude) at restaurants or businesses. I also get 'sir' a lot with my receding hairline. To me there is nothing wrong with it. It's just vernacular.

[jerbear30]

A couple of my son's friends call me sir and it kind of makes me feel nervous, like they're making fun of me or something.

[Treasurevalley92]

Originally Posted by SanJac

Its' interesting to read the different perspectives on this. For me, using "yes sir, yes ma'am" is perfectly normal and expected. Two recent examples:

A new member of my team at work always addresses me with "yes sir" or "no sir." Coincidentally he is from Louisiana and he is in his late 20s. My first thought when he joined the team was "wow, what a respectful and polite young man!" Never would I have dreamed to associate anything negative with those terms.

At Thanksgiving Dinner my niece corrected her children (ages 10 and 7) to not say "yeah" to their grandparents but to say "yes sir and yes ma'am." Again, this was perfectly normal to me and gave me a sense of pride that she was raising her children to have good manners!

I guess it really depends on one's upbringing how these terms are perceived. I still would argue in Texas (and in Houston) this is more the norm than the exception.

Yeah neither is right or wrong, but that is how it is perceived outside of where it is the norm.

Most of us who don't use it don't take offence if we are addressed that way, though it does feel a little awkward and quaint.

[Treasurevalley92]

Originally Posted by jerbear30

A couple of my son's friends call me sir and it kind of makes me feel nervous, like they're making fun of me or something.

Yep. I just remind myself that they are prob trying to be polite and it's something their parents told them to do.