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I also should be allowed to feel sad that my sister in law married a non Jew. ...............
It's to express my sadness at how far the Jewish people have fallen that we tolerate interfaith marriage and that we go so far as to attack the chutzpah of a Jew who criticizes the abandonment of Torah values.
I think you should have every right to be sad that your sister married out of her faith, and while I even support the notion that Jews should marry Jews, it's really doesn't seem that bad if a Jew married a Torah observant gentile. There are a lot of examples of Gentiles being added into Israel through marriage and through keeping the feasts and Sabbaths of God.....
Personally, I think Moses and Solomon knew something that most do not.
I know that if I were a Jew, I would do anything to try and support my siblings to marry other Jews and ESPECIALLY, not to marry people from other faiths, that would be sad, I can imagine my sister marrying somebody from another faith and me and my sister aren't even of the same faith.
What the heck would they do on holidays?
I don't attend any holidays my family has, they have huge parties and I am never there.
Of course, this is none of our business, but now we are curious. What exactly was his problem?
If his problem was that he didn't like being married to his first wife, then I would say he solved that problem by divorcing her and finding a new wife more to his liking.
Of course, this is none of our business, but now we are curious. What exactly was his problem?
If his problem was that he didn't like being married to his first wife, then I would say he solved that problem by divorcing her and finding a new wife more to his liking.
Seems to me like a cultic practice of sexual and relational authoritarianism. Did King David marry any non-Jews? What about other figures considered "Jewish" in Jewish history?
If I was a failure at common relationships past marriage (couldn't wait for children, couldn't stand not being in my own culture, etc.), I would also seek someone who's religion told them to accept me no matter what (except a few major things that I wouldn't do anyway) after marriage, especially if that religion made them have a lot more in common with me (such as less doubting and less thinking about the incorrectness of it).
I'm guessing that is what happened here (it's a long thread) and the history of Israel (as any other Nation) is rife with imagination, failure, and perseverance.
When your Jewish child marries a non-Jew, it's the equivalent to the death of a child, chas v'shalom.
OK, I can accept that members of his family were upset when he married a non-Jew.
However, when you used the phrase "his problem", I get the impression that he saw his first marriage as a problem.
It seems that if he saw a problem in his first wife not being Jewish, he would not have married her in the first place. Maybe over time, he realized he had made a mistake by marrying a non-Jew, so it eventually became a problem.
For example, I was definitely going bald when my wife married me 44 years ago, so it would be strange if she now wanted to divorce me because I am bald. I mean, she knew the kind of person she was marrying 44 years ago, so why complain about it now?
Seems to me like a cultic practice of sexual and relational authoritarianism. Did King David marry any non-Jews? What about other figures considered "Jewish" in Jewish history?
If I was a failure at common relationships past marriage (couldn't wait for children, couldn't stand not being in my own culture, etc.), I would also seek someone who's religion told them to accept me no matter what (except a few major things that I wouldn't do anyway) after marriage, especially if that religion made them have a lot more in common with me (such as less doubting and less thinking about the incorrectness of it).
I'm guessing that is what happened here (it's a long thread) and the history of Israel (as any other Nation) is rife with imagination, failure, and perseverance.
Moses himself married a Non Jew and was talked about because he did so, but Moses knew the plan.
The song of songs is written to a non Jew because Solomon knew the plan, Israel didn't, doesn't.
This almost had a happy ending. My wife's brother married a non-Jew about ten years ago. They divorced about 5 years later, with no kids, primarily because being married to a non-Jew was just too complicated, even though he's a totally secular guy.
After divorce, he decided to specifically aim for marrying a Jewish girl. He only dated Jews. About 2 years ago, he found the most amazing Jewish girl. Last year they got engaged, and the wedding is rapidly approaching. They're going to have a beautiful wedding on the Jersey Shore.
. . . All of our brothers and sisters married non-Jews. . . .
So, if I have this straight, her brother is doing distinctly better than your family average and her family average. I'm taking a guess that the reason your BIL does not realize his future kids' status is because neither you nor your wife has discussed it with him, either because his fiancee is such a gem, because it's not your place to do so, or both. Either reason could serve as a hint as to what to do here (nothing?), or possibly even a reason for you and your wife each to review his/her attitude towards the whole thing. FWIW, it sounds like Reform congregations are going to regard the kids as Jewish. You and your wife know better, but what would be your BIL's outlook on this? Are you sure that he doesn't already know what observant Jews think about this? Is there any chance at all that she would be interested in really converting? I know I'm grasping at straws here, but don't forget that he wasn't observant before; why do you think that he would care now?
Just a few thoughts above. I'm certainly not telling you what to think or do, either one.
Best wishes.
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