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Wooo! 4 words and an emoticon and you've affirmed much of what Albert's post was about. Disagree with what someone said? Make a sarcastic comment to avoid real confrontation!
Anyways, it's not as great here as most Minnesotans would have you believe, and it's not as bad as Albert would have you believe. It's just a place with it's own quirks, pros, and cons, and a population that is wild over it.
The good: Outdoor rec opportunities galore, good scenery, a more progressive population than other areas, and polite and helpful neighbors. If you need help jumping your car or carrying your groceries, they'll help you out.
The bad: Winters can be very long. This isn't necessarily bad, as long as you're prepared to be proactive on keeping your life going and getting out and enjoying things. It takes some adjustment, though.
Also, while most people will be willing to help you out, making friends is another matter. After 2 years here I have barely anyone who I'd consider more than an acquaintance. They'll be nice to you, and occasionally even invite you somewhere, but that's as far as I've gotten. It probably takes more time than this to make good connections, but 2 years is enough for me to call it quits on the state. If you're willing to chip and chip and chip away at the stoic reserve to get someone to be close to you, then go for it. YMMV by region, though- I'm in northern MN, which is traditionally more reserved.
Wooo! 4 words and an emoticon and you've affirmed much of what Albert's post was about. Disagree with what someone said? Make a sarcastic comment to avoid real confrontation!
Anyways, it's not as great here as most Minnesotans would have you believe, and it's not as bad as Albert would have you believe. It's just a place with it's own quirks, pros, and cons, and a population that is wild over it.
The good: Outdoor rec opportunities galore, good scenery, a more progressive population than other areas, and polite and helpful neighbors. If you need help jumping your car or carrying your groceries, they'll help you out.
The bad: Winters can be very long. This isn't necessarily bad, as long as you're prepared to be proactive on keeping your life going and getting out and enjoying things. It takes some adjustment, though.
Also, while most people will be willing to help you out, making friends is another matter. After 2 years here I have barely anyone who I'd consider more than an acquaintance. They'll be nice to you, and occasionally even invite you somewhere, but that's as far as I've gotten. It probably takes more time than this to make good connections, but 2 years is enough for me to call it quits on the state. If you're willing to chip and chip and chip away at the stoic reserve to get someone to be close to you, then go for it. YMMV by region, though- I'm in northern MN, which is traditionally more reserved.
A true southerner would know exactly what I meant by my post
Yes. I lived about 30 years in the Twin Cities, and I found the winters much more comfortable overall than Chicago's. The genuinely cold weather in Minnesota is usually associated with Canadian high pressure systems, which usually means sunny days, a dry air mass, and relatively calm winds. 10 below zero when there's no humidity and no wind, and the sun is shining on you, is a piece of cake, especially when compared to Chicago.
Are Minnesotans still genuinely nice and friendly? Well, no, but then that question implies that there was once a time when they were genuinely nice and friendly. There never was such a time. I live in Kentucky now, and I often say that the people here are as genuinely nice and friendly as the people in Minnesota brag about being.
People in the South tend to be genuinely nice because that's just the way they are; it wouldn't occur to them to be anything else, even if they knew how. People in Minnesota tend to be pleasant, easygoing, and superficially polite because it's their passive-aggressive defense mechanism to prevent any potential confrontation, which people in Minnesota avoid as if they were rattlesnakes.
You get used to it after a while, but coming from the South - where people really are genuinely nice - you will notice the difference.
Good luck with that one. Most Minnesotans would rather tear their tongues out with red hot pliers than share honest opinions, especially with a stranger. They don't want to say anything that would rock the boat or draw attention to themselves.
The first time you're in a group of Minnesotans, watch all of their faces when you say something that's even mildly, borderline controversial. It's comical, watching their facial expressions - "What did he just say? Was that an OK thing to say? How am I supposed to react to that? Maybe someone else will say something first, and I won't have to." After a painful, uncomfortable moment, the bravest of them may venture, "Well... that's different," in a cautiously neutral tone of voice, so as not to give any indication that they're criticizing you or supporting you until they've had a chance to measure the reactions of the other Minnesotans.
Once they've cracked the door open with that courageous declaration, there'll be a few lame, "witty" jokes, punctuated by little flurries of nervous laughter as they feel around for the consensus. They'll watch one another's facial expressions, and after a few awkward seconds, someone will probably find a way to steer the conversation around the faux pas without anyone having to make a declarative statement either in agreement or disagreement.
To put it bluntly, if you enjoy speaking frankly about any subject at all - much less genuinely controversial issues such as religion or politics - you'd do well to make friends with people who are not native Minnesotans. Even if you are somehow able to get Minnesotans to actually go on record on issues like that, you'll quickly realize that by the end of the conversation, you don't know if they were saying what they really thought, or just what they thought they needed to say in order to avoid having to disagree with you.
Other than that, it's really not a bad place to live. I miss it a lot, actually. The cultural environment is almost without parallel, the scenery and outdoor recreational opportunities are among the finest in the country, and it's just a genuinely beautiful area. There are a lot of things I really miss about it.... just not the people, unfortunately.
I'm a long time resident and non-native, and your comments are reasonably accurate except where you describe Minnesotans as passive aggressive. You are not using that term correctly.
Passive aggressive behavior is the non-verbal expression of hostility, and there's nothing hostile at all about the people here. You yourself describe Minnesotans as " pleasant, easygoing, and superficially polite" and I would agree with that, except the superficial part. If you add passive aggressive behavior to the mix, then you are saying that those characteristics are only superficial and that underneath that surface, Minmesotans are secretly hostile toward others.
In fact, nothing could be further from the truth.
Now it's correct that we don't go talking politics or religion with strangers, and we don't spill out our innermost feelings to every Tom, Dick, and Harry. We save that for those to whom we are genuinely close. So if doing that touchy feely stuff with just anyone and everyone appeals to you, you will find few willing participants here. But that reluctance doesn't make us any less nice and it sure doesn't reflect any hostility, it's just a different interpersonal style that what maybe you prefer.
Last edited by Glenfield; 12-12-2013 at 03:04 PM..
I want a big change in my life. I am done with college so I am free to go anywhere. I generally prefer the cold with a strong dislike for Mississippi's hot humid summers.
I have heard many great things about Twin Cities (Minneapolis/St. Paul).
My only concern is the climate. Although I prefer the cold, I am not sure what my tolerance is. I could tolerate the cold in Chicago in January. Will my body get adjusted by the second winter after experiencing the first one in MN?
I have a mixed feeling about Chicagoans because most I met weren't friendly. How are Minnesotans in general? I have heard about Minnesota Nice. Are they still genuinely nice and friendly like most southerners but more reserved, of course?
I happen to be friendly and very forwarding. We Mississippians like to talk about anything including sports, religion, politics, and sharing opinions in a polite way.
There should not be any problem talking sports in the state, but the reluctance with religion and politics will be overcome easily if you can reassure them that if they have a different religion or political viewpoint that it will not be a "brass knuckles/no holds barred" confrontation. In religion, they just do not want to be crucified for having a different view (pun intended)!
A simple "I won't bite or attack you if you feel differently. We are just talking and sharing" should be enough reassurance. Southerners along with people from Utah have the reputation (probably not fair, but it's the reality) for less religious tolerance than the rest of the country. In many parts of the South you are considered a lesser person if you are not an evangelical/Baptist. In some areas of Utah, you are considered lesser if you are not LDS/Mormon. In Minnesota, people could care less if you are not a Lutheran. In fact for some it will be a relief as they know so many among friends and family already.
The "southern intolerance" is probably exaggerated in the year 2013 and probably no longer exists in most of the South's larger cities or so I have heard. Things have changed in the last 20 years, but some people might be reluctant to discuss it until you say it will be respectful.
If the sports talk gets too depressing about the Vikings and Twins struggles in recent years, you can always cheer people up by talking about Minnesota's most successful pro sports team: the Minnesota Lynx of the WNBA.
I am hoping you move to the northeast and then you will create a new thread:
I want to talk to Easterners about religion and politics, but they are so in your face, angry and confrontational I just give up! ...LOL!
Maybe you would find Minnesota is not so bad. The grass is greener somewhere else until you actually go there. Personally, I have been treated well in Minnesota both when I lived there and when I visit. I have visited several states including Florida and none matches Minnesota for friendly people IMO. (The people in Cocoa Beach, FL came close, but partly because a waitress at a diner that served me and some friends was originally from Minnesota!).
I have never been to Mississippi, but I went to a training seminar related to work back in the late 90's and talked to a guy from Mississippi there and we and some other people went to dinner afterwards. To this day I would consider him one of the friendliest people I ever met (easily among top 5 or 6).
OP, if you do move to Minnesota, you're already learning a valuable lesson from this thread - when in Minnesota, don't ever say a disparaging word about "Minnesota Nice." It's just not.... well.... nice.
Translation: Albert is not happy that there was not unanimous agreement with his post. If people were truly MN Nice they would simply agree with him and not question any of it, so he would not be offended.
BTW, I have rarely read a post disparaging something anywhere and I have read those in other state forums (California, Colorado, etc) where there is unanimous agreement. You will get some that will agree and some that won't and that is the American way, right?
I agree, this is more accurate then Albert's reply. I am not a native of Minnesota; I moved here some twenty-five years ago and adjusted just fine. That could be because I am a Midwesterner, I don't know. I will say that no matter where I have lived or visited I don't get into conversations with people about politics or religion. I personally think people run off at the mouth too soon and too much about those things leaving themselves wide open for judgment from others. I never ask people what their views are on politics and religion because I don't think it is any of my business initially. There is time for those conversations later, once you are closer friends with them.
Yes, I meant to quote myself. After reading the posts since this one and seeing people commenting on the talking of politics and religion I want to add something. When I was a kid I was taught it was taboo to talk (casually) about religion, politics, or how much money a person made. That was in the 1960's and I was raised in Chicago. Yeah, that's right, a place with plenty of crooked politicians throughout its history. Anyway, my viewpoint (above) is not a Minnesota thing, I brought it with me. I am not an uptight person either. I am quite open with those I am friends with.
Now it's correct that we don't go talking politics or religion with strangers, and we don't spill out our innermost feelings to every Tom, Dick, and Harry. We save that for those to whom we are genuinely close. So if doing that touchy feely stuff with just anyone and everyone appeals to you, you will find few willing participants here. But that reluctance doesn't make us any less nice and it sure doesn't reflect any hostility, it's just a different interpersonal style that what maybe you prefer.
After reading all replies, I can see that conversational style in Minnesota is very different from Mississippi. We Mississippians are more open about everything and take pride in hospitality.
I can avoid talking about taboo subjects that Minnesotans avoid such as religion and politics until we become good friends. That wouldn't be a problem. I can always talk about weather and sports.
I wonder if it's just Minnesota or are the Midwesterners like this way even in Lower Midwest such as Missouri, Indiana, and Ohio?
first off, great questions. Glad you are interested in MN. I will give you my thoughts about the state and my experiences. First off, MN is a great state in terms of the way it looks, feels, but it does come with some heavy downsides. I currently live in CO, lived in CA for 6.5 yrs, and in MN from 0-18 yrs and went back for another 5.5 years.
Will my body get adjusted by the second winter after experiencing the first one in MN?
No, the adjustment period can vary and depends on the winter. The past couple of winters in MN have been mild and not the norm. This year is more normal and sucks. I hate negative degree weather and in Janurary and Feburary the mornings are brutally cold and unforgiving. If you decide you want to live there I recommend having a garaged car, better if heated, and it will take away a lot of the pain of warming up a cold car. If you drive the car that has been sitting outside, I hope you have gloves. You will freeze your hands on that steering wheel. Also, it does get down to -20 degrees on rare occasion. You need ot prep yourself for this kind of weather. sometimes cars don't start if you own an older car. Prepare. You need to have thick gloves that fingers share together, My heater failed me in my car and I couldn't see out the front winder because my breath froze on the inside of the window. I had medium gloves on and drove about 25 minutes and probably had a small amount of frost bite. I had to use my window scraper on the inside of the cars window, which made my hands worse. It depends on the weather and how willing you are to adapt. I left the state because I couldn't deal with the cold weather and didn't think it was worth the high taxes, higher COA, and overcast weather and cold mornings.
I have a mixed feeling about Chicagoans because most I met weren't friendly. How are Minnesotans in general? I have heard about Minnesota Nice. Are they still genuinely nice and friendly like most southerners but more reserved, of course?
Minnesota people are a weird breed and not like Chicago. My parents and family are from Chicago. I could go down to Chicago and they are very open easy to get along with people. They talk a lot and converse a ton. Hell, I could go down to Chicago and probably get 3 GF's in a weekend (I am married, I wouldn't do that). Minnesota is very introvert. They are a completely different breed IMO. You can find people more outgoing, but on a whole they are into themselves and typically stick within their old circles of established friends. But this isn't all that different than most other places. I do think California, and Colorado are much easier to make friends, but you still need to make a little effort. I know everyone in my gym that I work out in, atleast the guys. (I don't talk to the girls, don't want to give mixed signals). Most of the people here are from TX, CA, and all over. MN is reserved, and more closed off. It depends on what you like. Being single in MN is crappy, trust me. Other states are sooooo much easier to find girls/guys and are much easier to approach and talk to.
Yes. I lived about 30 years in the Twin Cities, and I found the winters much more comfortable overall than Chicago's. The genuinely cold weather in Minnesota is usually associated with Canadian high pressure systems, which usually means sunny days, a dry air mass, and relatively calm winds. 10 below zero when there's no humidity and no wind, and the sun is shining on you, is a piece of cake, especially when compared to Chicago.
Are Minnesotans still genuinely nice and friendly? Well, no, but then that question implies that there was once a time when they were genuinely nice and friendly. There never was such a time. I live in Kentucky now, and I often say that the people here are as genuinely nice and friendly as the people in Minnesota brag about being.
People in the South tend to be genuinely nice because that's just the way they are; it wouldn't occur to them to be anything else, even if they knew how. People in Minnesota tend to be pleasant, easygoing, and superficially polite because it's their passive-aggressive defense mechanism to prevent any potential confrontation, which people in Minnesota avoid as if they were rattlesnakes.
You get used to it after a while, but coming from the South - where people really are genuinely nice - you will notice the difference.
Good luck with that one. Most Minnesotans would rather tear their tongues out with red hot pliers than share honest opinions, especially with a stranger. They don't want to say anything that would rock the boat or draw attention to themselves.
The first time you're in a group of Minnesotans, watch all of their faces when you say something that's even mildly, borderline controversial. It's comical, watching their facial expressions - "What did he just say? Was that an OK thing to say? How am I supposed to react to that? Maybe someone else will say something first, and I won't have to." After a painful, uncomfortable moment, the bravest of them may venture, "Well... that's different," in a cautiously neutral tone of voice, so as not to give any indication that they're criticizing you or supporting you until they've had a chance to measure the reactions of the other Minnesotans.
Once they've cracked the door open with that courageous declaration, there'll be a few lame, "witty" jokes, punctuated by little flurries of nervous laughter as they feel around for the consensus. They'll watch one another's facial expressions, and after a few awkward seconds, someone will probably find a way to steer the conversation around the faux pas without anyone having to make a declarative statement either in agreement or disagreement.
To put it bluntly, if you enjoy speaking frankly about any subject at all - much less genuinely controversial issues such as religion or politics - you'd do well to make friends with people who are not native Minnesotans. Even if you are somehow able to get Minnesotans to actually go on record on issues like that, you'll quickly realize that by the end of the conversation, you don't know if they were saying what they really thought, or just what they thought they needed to say in order to avoid having to disagree with you.
Other than that, it's really not a bad place to live. I miss it a lot, actually. The cultural environment is almost without parallel, the scenery and outdoor recreational opportunities are among the finest in the country, and it's just a genuinely beautiful area. There are a lot of things I really miss about it.... just not the people, unfortunately.
I laughed at this response, not because it is bad, but because of how accurate it is!!!!
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Anyway, my viewpoint (above) is not a Minnesota thing, I brought it with me. I am not an uptight person either. I am quite open with those I am friends with.
