well my Mom is in the nursing home only a few days left to live (accept, good)

[NJ~LuLu]

For what its worth Marilyn I agree with mikes post. You should not feel guilty.
I sat with my Dad for 10 days out of state. I could not take anymore not to mention the cost of hotels, meals and flights. I left saying Goodbye, when he finally passed away, I did not fly out to see him, decided to remember him when I last saw him which was bad enough. I felt a bit guilty at first, but time healed that for me and I'm glad I had the chance to spend some time, he did not know me. At the end, on the morphine drip, my Dad just went to sleep. I wished for Dr kavorkian myself after seeing my Dad go thru this. Thankfully the hospice people are tuned in to all the aspects of final moments with patients and family. My hat goes off to them they certainly have earned their Angel wings.
Be Well

[stevemorse]

thanks LuLU and Mike. Yes I had to leave, they have the morphine drip going and I am all for DR. Kavorkian !!! This really sucks. And its a shock. Its a shock everyday to walk in and see worse than the day before. I wish I could sit there all day like some people but I cant. I just go everyday and then after a few hours cant take it. It seems the worse its getting the less I can take. I guess I should not feel guilt for not sitting there all day and night but I just cant.

As far as someone said taking care of myself. Yes I do that too. I have made the most beautiful muscles on my arms and shoulders all full defination. ALl this just caused me to really bang those weights as hard as I could for an hours a day and I feel better doing that. It helps me to throw around that heavy iron. Its a mental thing. Funny I never had any patience in my life for walking on treadmills but throwing heavy weight around gets me so high!!

Ok probably the next post you all read she will be gone.

Thanks for all sticking by the depressing little blog. It may be painful one day to go back and read it but it sure helped me express this process of death. I hope the next time its not this bad!!! Or its me first.

[colleeng47]

Even though you've watched her deteriorate, be ready for the shock when you get the call that she's actually gone. My mom lingered in the hospital (not too long, thankfully), but I still went into shock when my brother-in-law called me.

This is a very difficult thing to go through. Keep posting, we're here for you.

[dogmom]

Marilyn I hope for everyone's sake it's soon. we did this with my father in law, it was hard...hang in there...praying for you all

[stevemorse]

This blog is officially closed.
My mom passed away alittle while ago. Yes your were right, it still hurts, however this whole damn nightmare is over!

Thanks everyone here for listening, all the prayers, everything.

Your people were a great source of comfort to me.
Marilyn

[dogmom]

Marilyn..the pain is over..now time to heal with your family..God Bless..

[ambersmom722]

<hugs and prayers from GA> you are in my prayers!!! such a strong and admirable person.

[NJ~LuLu]

Dear Marilyn, May you find Peace, Prayers to you and family.
Hope you don't mind, some songs that helped me get through sent from good friends.


YouTube - QUEENSRYCHE - SILENT LUCIDITY


YouTube - Josh Groban - To Where You Are


YouTube - Mercy Me - Homesick (Live)

Rest in Peace dear lady, God speed.

[Calico696]

Originally Posted by stevemorse

Update and some good news for once:

They are taking her off dialysis!!!!!! This is good, either way now its going to end soon. they think the liver will go before the kidneys and now we are at every end stage. Not eating, mumbling, out of it, great pain. This is almost over and its a relief. Dad FINALLY said its a relief!!!!!

My thoughts are with you Marilyn at this difficult time.

[brookdaleresident]

So sorry Marilyn. Take care of yourself.