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Yeah open calls for restaurants in Manhattan are like that. There are hiring 2 people and interviewing 100. They're ageist, sexist and look-ist too, and not even very discreet about it. I dress like I'm going on a date for open calls.
This is pretty dumb thread. It's like asking why do trolls like to troll people and you'll get million different answers. For the fun of it, just because they can, bored, wanted to prank someone, and list goes on.
It's same for the very question asked. Some will say they exaggerate so naive people who doesn't take it seriously will take it bit more seriously, some will say others say it to keep people out for competition, some people will say it's not that bad so why lie, etc. Anyway, biggest thing is that most people always get a shock when they come to NYC especially if they are from places where living costs are low.
As to OP. You lived in NYC all your life, that's why it's not surprising or hard for you to live here waiting tables and still survive with certain life expectations. However if or had you lived outside NYC for most or all of your life and never lived in area where living costs expensive like here., Then yeah it'll be a shock, guaranteed. If say waiter or waitress living in Ohio or Texas come here, they'll have some expectations on their lifestyle they were able to maintain or afford. That needs to be cut down quite a bit but most people don't do that. On the flip side, when people live NYC, most people go oh man I can get so much space and my lifestyle can go up much more even for less money.
It's a matter of tempering expectations. I don't think most people who move here understand what they are going to have to put up with when they rent at the bottom price within the range of market rentals. You are stating that it's easy to find a one bedroom for $1200 in Astoria. Since a really nice, ultra modern, doorman one bedroom in a top location goes for $2000 and up in Astoria, I would hazard a guess that the one bedrooms at $1200 have certain undesirable issues that most from out of town are not used to having to deal with.
While I don't agree with posts that state you must live in a bad area if all you have to spend is $1000-$1200 for rent (because there are plenty of safe, albeit unhip neighborhoods where you can still find housing for this amount), it is true that you have to make major (and probably unexpected) compromises in what kind of place and neighborhood you're willing to live in.
If you've never lived out of NYC, then you wouldn't know that in many places, people do not put up with sagging floorboards, unrenovated kitchens, inability to regulate heat, old buildings, broken doorbells, no a/c, leaky ceilings, etc. Everyone I know who pays on the low end for housing here in this city is making some sort of compromise with their living space and I think it's important for newcomers to understand this, especially if they are going to be seeking housing in the low end of the range.
ding ding ding. we have a winner!
also: i think sometimes responders are secretly hoping the uninitiated question-askers will simply choose a different city/town to move to. those responders likely feel: if someone is young and seeking to move and already has a brain then they wouldn't need to ask. jmo and i could be wrong.
I speak realistically. If someone wants to come here with 2 kids and only 60k, your QOL is going to be pretty bad. You can survive, but it will be a far outer borough and a possibly unsafe area.
I think the posters assume these people are naive and idiotic. That they could have researched before they made a post. There are too many "I make 50k, can I live here?" posts. Always the same things, what does it cost, how much are groceries, how how how. Do some research, have some areas in mind and come with a realistic budget. Maybe then people can say "hey this person actually knows what they are talking about."
NYC is an expensive city - yea there are people who can make it here on a $50K or $40K salary, but these people (1) live in the cheapest housing they can find (2) budget to the extreme (to the point of being called 'penny pinchers') and (3) most likely, don't have a ton in savings/retirement - or are unable to max out their 401Ks every year. I would also hazard a guess that such a person probably isn't living a very fun life if they have to constantly watch their pennies for fear of overdrafting their bank account.
In your original post, you did not mention any assets or liabilities. Do you have a 401K or IRA? How are you paying for those cosmetic procedures? Do you have credit card debt? Do you have at least 8 months of an emergency savings fund in the event you lose your job or some medical problem happens to you or a close family member/relative/friend?
See - these are the questions I ask myself - because in my opinion, a man who earns $60K but lives in a modest studio in Forest Hills, Queens for under $1500/month; is able to max out his 401K, has an 8 month emergency fun, eats out only 3x/month, has no debt other than a $20K student loan from a CC, a FICO of 750, etc is better off than a guy making $120K living in a SoHo loft for around $2500/month, lives paycheck to paycheck with only a 2% contribution to savings, blows much of his income on dinners out 3x/week, no emergency fund, FICO of 620,and $95K in student loan/credit card debt. At the end of the day, its not about how much you earn, but how much you KEEP.
I agree its all about expectations, and how that person spends their money.
Last edited by LegalDiva; 05-29-2012 at 08:11 AM..
NYC is an expensive city - yea there are people who can make it here on a $50K or $40K salary, but these people (1) live in the cheapest housing they can find (2) budget to the extreme (to the point of being called 'penny pinchers') and (3) most likely, don't have a ton in savings/retirement - or are unable to max out their 401Ks every year. I would also hazard a guess that such a person probably isn't living a very fun life if they have to constantly watch their pennies for fear of overdrafting their bank account.
In your original post, you did not mention any assets or liabilities. Do you have a 401K or IRA? How are you paying for those cosmetic procedures? Do you have credit card debt? Do you have at least 8 months of an emergency savings fund in the event you lose your job or some medical problem happens to you or a close family member/relative/friend?
See - these are the questions I ask myself - because in my opinion, a man who earns $60K but lives in a modest studio in Forest Hills, Queens for under $1500/month; is able to max out his 401K, has an 8 month emergency fun, eats out only 3x/month, has no debt other than a $20K student loan from a CC, a FICO of 750, etc is better off than a guy making $120K living in a SoHo loft for around $2500/month, lives paycheck to paycheck with only a 2% contribution to savings, blows much of his income on dinners out 3x/week, no emergency fund, FICO of 620,and $95K in student loan/credit card debt. At the end of the day, its not about how much you earn, but how much you KEEP.
I agree its all about expectations, and how that person spends their money.
That is so very true. You are only succeeding when you are paying your bills and able to put away to retirement and savings. If you can't, then you are sinking slowly. Yes, some people get by and enjoy the high life, but at what cost? Drowning in debt to live some fancy lifestyle isn't fun.
This, from another thread, backs up my point about tempering expectations and housing quality being higher in many other cities.
Quote:
Originally Posted by varan
I've lived in both Houston and now in NYC.
We were renting something ridiculously nice in the Museum District in Houston for $1700. When we came back to NYC after my project ended, I sort of priced the equivalent here at about $5,500 or more. The problem is that very little of our housing stock here is new construction, or updated, or anything like that.
Astoria is nice and you can do $1,500. But see my note about the housing stock.
I mean, NYC is expensive, but some posters act like you have to be in a high powered job making at least 200K to live in the city.
I'm FROM the city, born and raised in Manhattan. I currently live in Borough Park, Brooklyn. Not the sexiest neighborhood, but it's safe. I could afford to pay more in rent, but I like having spending money.
I wait tables for a living. I've seen people tell people who work in the service industry that they will not be able to afford living in the five boroughs unless they can tolerate living in the ghetto. That just isn't true.
I'm a waitress and I get my nails done about twice a week, go the hair salon every two months (to get a full sew in, about 350 bucks), get my brows done, eat out, and pay my rent and am paying for cosmetic surgery. Life in the city isn't cheap, but I don't see why people need to scare others into thinking they have to have an extremely high powered job to move to the city or prepare to live on the streets.
Yeah I'm from here too- born and raised, and you know what I see a lot of? People (looking to relocate) not knowing what they're asking for in dire need of a reality check. It's not always their fault, but some just don't do their homework and are really looking for us to tell them what they want to hear.
Example of crap I see a lot of:
"I want to live no more than 10 minutes from work, right next to a train station, one block from nice BIG parks, walking distance from all the museums, cool shopping for me and my daughters, grocery shopping one block away and GREAT PUBLIC SCHOOLS for my 3 kids. Yeah, we need a 3 bedroom at least. I can afford 1200 a month for rent, can I do this? I also want to have money for going on vacation, taking the family out to dinner twice a week, buy nice clothes and I want to keep my car... How much money do I need? I have a job offer for 40k a year, I can't wait to take it and move me and the kids to NYC!"
While this person hasn't specified a neighborhood, this is clearly a request for a swanky Manhattan neighborhood but the person is in la-la land with how much rents cost for a 3br and how much income they need to fund the quality of life they're describing.
Even worse are the "I don't have a job, I'm a single parent, I have no education or money. Should I move to NYC?" people.
So I drop the bomb on what it would cost, in Manhattan... If it scares them, GOOD!!! They need to know what they're asking, and not to be told what they want to hear because they'd be SCREWED if they moved here with such false expectations.
Occasionally there are realistic people out there. Thank goodness. But there's a fair number who really need a slap of realism to wake them up. There's quite a few who demand a location or quality of life that their budget just cannot afford, and some just can't wrap their head around how much higher the cost of living is here compared to their point of origin.
I also see a fair number of NYers lying by omission about how little you can scrape by on. Sure you can live here on a shoestring, but what are you willing to give up? Safety? Commute time? School quality? Vacations? Location? Apartment size? Bank savings? Entertainment? Investments? Clothing? Having children? Sometimes there's very little honesty about the sacrifices people need to make for certain income levels to be viable. So I can't help but to flinch when I see some people saying things like "oh sure you can move here and raise 3 girls on 40k! No prob! Don't listen to those snobs who say you need at least 100k!" but there's no mention of the things you'd need to go without in order to get by on so little, the negatives glossed over or lied about ("oh, Brownsville isn't that bad at all!!") and no end to the rationalizations on how it can be done as if the end justifies the means.
Reading through this thread I can't help but wonder what people's expectations are. My wife and I are hoping to move to NYC for a couple years just to do it. We expect a small apartment and have found plenty in the $1,000 - $1,400 range which is lower than we were lead to expect. We have no kids,I love to cook, we don't really drink much and aren't used to luxuries.
I was really curious to read through this because everyone talks about how expensive it is to live in Manhattan but it sounds like its only that expensive if you're planning on a big apartment or fancy dining every night. Are my expectations real or am I missing some hidden costs of living in NYC?
Reading through this thread I can't help but wonder what people's expectations are. My wife and I are hoping to move to NYC for a couple years just to do it. We expect a small apartment and have found plenty in the $1,000 - $1,400 range which is lower than we were lead to expect. ?
What do you mean by "found"? If you mean you "found" those $1000-$1400 apartments on craigslist, you are in for a rude awakening, as those apartments mostly don't exist in reality. They are scams, bait and switches, apartments don't match the photos, stated location is a lie, etc.
In the best case scenario, the apartment does exist and is a good deal, in which case it will probably get claimed within the first few hours of becoming available. Will you be the first one to see it and get it (prepared with your bank statements, W-2s, letters from employers, etc.) or will someone who has lived here longer than you be more savvy and scoop it up before you?
You might read this thread in order to prepare yourself.
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