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Your neighbor is just moving around his apartment and not creating noise intentionally while you on the other hand are creating noise intentionally by yelling/using your broom. Who is in the wrong here? Not everyone works 9-5 in a city that is alive 24/7.
Wrong. He has people over, parties, get together for games and you hearing nothing but stomping, clapping and cheering. True not everyone works 9-5 as I don't i often have to be at work at 630am!
Note: I don't think expecting quietness from midnight to say 7-8am is took much. He makes noise through out the day but I don't say anything about that cause that is to be expected. I'm not trying to say he can't enjoy his own apartment. During late hours it is an issue due to me not able to get sleep.
Last edited by livingsinglenyc; 04-21-2013 at 05:47 PM..
Best thing to do is make friends. If you make an enemy out of him he will only get worse. If this person becomes your friend he will think twice before disturbing you. consideration is a two way street. Next time you see him make some small talk, offer him a tall can and sit out on the stoop. Then when you hear footsteps again you will not sweat it, it is just your friend walking around upstairs.
I like this idea but I don't know who he is or what he looks like. I would much rather be on friendly terms with him. I am with both of my neighbors and its nice. Everyone else in the building I get along well with too. Its a friendly building and people actually say hi to each other and hold the elevator open for one another.
Livingsingle, can I offer one more piece of advice?
When asking your neighbor to be quiet, make sure to tell him that he should not hesitate to give you a heads-up if you're making noise that disturbs him. When demanding something of someone else, holding yourself to the same standard should go without saying, right? "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you" is the Golden Rule.
You're probably already being quiet, but give him the reassurance that if you ever bother him, he can call you out on it. This will make the problem seem less like you making a one-sided complaint and more like you wanting to live in harmony with your neighbors.
I work the overnight shift and sleep during the day, so when I moved to my current apartment (which I bought), the number-one issue for me was quietness. When I'm up all night long on my days off, I'm "pin-drop quiet", as the saying goes -- I have to be, because my wife is sleeping in the next room!
There really isn't anything you can do about it if you are living in an old building, which is very typical in NY. I used to be in this same situation not too long ago. The people upstairs would stomp on the floor like gorillas and then the parties omg. there was this one time when I thought the ceiling was going to collapse because it sounded like elephants were having a step show upstairs. I was genuinely terrified. My apartment itself was SHAKING. Thank god I was able to move, it was just ridiculous.
Sorry to hear, just one of the pleasures of living in New York City
Livingsingle, can I offer one more piece of advice?
When asking your neighbor to be quiet, make sure to tell him that he should not hesitate to give you a heads-up if you're making noise that disturbs him. When demanding something of someone else, holding yourself to the same standard should go without saying, right? "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you" is the Golden Rule.
You're probably already being quiet, but give him the reassurance that if you ever bother him, he can call you out on it. This will make the problem seem less like you making a one-sided complaint and more like you wanting to live in harmony with your neighbors.
I work the overnight shift and sleep during the day, so when I moved to my current apartment (which I bought), the number-one issue for me was quietness. When I'm up all night long on my days off, I'm "pin-drop quiet", as the saying goes -- I have to be, because my wife is sleeping in the next room!
I like to think I am a very considerate neighbor to my downstairs and side neighbors. I walk around wearing slipper socks, don't put on shoes till I'm by my door about to leave, don't own a tv and only play music from my computer on occasion. I also don't have people over so I would like to think I'm a great neighbor. I like my home to be relaxing and quiet. I understand not everyone feels the same but I honestly always think how my actions in my apartment affect others. I think I will chat with my super as he knows everyone in the building many he can give me a heads up about him and then I can chat with him.
Does your lease have a clause for times of noise allowed? Most leases in most areas of the country ( Lord only knows what NYC has) specify when loud noise must be curtailed. If it does, speak to the guy and show it to him. If he doesn't pay any attention, bring it to the attention of the landlord.
If he works 2nd shift or 3rd and has different hours, then he still has a right to life after work. If it is loud parties, I doubt it is allowed.
If nothing works out, then find a top floor apt somewhere
I've been on the other side of this issue before- my downstairs neighbor used to complain CONSTANTLY. Problem is, all I was doing literally was walking around my apartment with slippers on. Sometimes the older buildings are so bad with sound transmission that no matter how conscious and careful you are there is little you can do. I can tell you this much- my downstairs neighbor used to knock on his ceiling with a broom. In my opinion there is nothing more rude and obnoxious that you could possibly do. Understand that as much as you are annoyed by your neighbor, he/she is simply living their life. Screaming and yelling and banging on their floor is so rude and inconsiderate, just like you think they are rude and inconsiderate by making noise and disrupting you. Your only bet is to knock on the door, apologize for how poorly you have been handling it and explain the situation. Ask that they try to be more careful because you go to bed early. Hostility and anger will get you nowhere near as far as kindness and mature discussion.
^Agree. I used to be able to hear sounds above, below and next to me in my old building. I could hear the woman next door walking around and she was barely over 100 pounds. Maybe the person is a "heavy walker" which doesn't require you to be heavy. I can hear the person above me walking (though not TOO loudly) but I can hear when she is sweeping so if I can hear that then I KNOW I am going to hear footsteps. That's just the way it is.
Quote:
Originally Posted by livingsinglenyc
Wrong. He has people over, parties, get together for games and you hearing nothing but stomping, clapping and cheering. True not everyone works 9-5 as I don't i often have to be at work at 630am!
Note: I don't think expecting quietness from midnight to say 7-8am is took much. He makes noise through out the day but I don't say anything about that cause that is to be expected. I'm not trying to say he can't enjoy his own apartment. During late hours it is an issue due to me not able to get sleep.
I work nights and let me tell you---those of us who work nights have it MUCH worse than anyone else. Work is going on in the building, outside of the building and people who are home are much more likely to blast their radios/sound systems/etc. because they figure it's during the day so they don't have to be as quiet and that not too many people are around so no one will complain.
Quote:
Originally Posted by livingsinglenyc
I like to think I am a very considerate neighbor to my downstairs and side neighbors. I walk around wearing slipper socks, don't put on shoes till I'm by my door about to leave, don't own a tv and only play music from my computer on occasion. I also don't have people over so I would like to think I'm a great neighbor. I like my home to be relaxing and quiet. I understand not everyone feels the same but I honestly always think how my actions in my apartment affect others. I think I will chat with my super as he knows everyone in the building many he can give me a heads up about him and then I can chat with him.
My husband and I do not walk around in shoes (we wear slippers but I don't see how walking around in sneakers is any different), we watch TV on a VERY low volume (I am very sensitive to sounds), I play music only from the computer and we rarely have people over. I am still going to assume that at times, our neighbors are annoyed when they hear us walking, hear our cats who barely weigh anything running around (since I can hear the cat above us run back and forth sometimes, I'm assuming they can hear my little imps), hear me vacuuming because we are required to cover a certain percentage of the floor in rugs, etc.
Q: Does your building require rugs to be put down? I think the person who suggested that you possibly speak to them, let them know how it sounds to you and also express that you've not always acted the best and will try to be a good neighbor as well is on the right track. I would try to go this route if nothing else. I will say that my last building was much worse in terms of the crazy stuff I heard above me, below me and next to me. :-) I would take what you are hearing over the emotionally and developmentally disabled teenager below (only screamed "mommy" repeatedly and banging stuff like you wouldn't believe) who replaced the guy who fought with his girlfriend daily and had very loud and fake sounding intimate relations. And the girl next door who constantly cried (even over a Subway sandwich), always fought with her boyfriend and complained about being so beautiful and people being jealous of her.
It is such a shame, it is a common problem in apartments.
I am going through it now. The floors of the people upstairs squeak with every step. They walk around all night. They also play guitar, which I can hear. It's not too loud though, and I can tolerate that over the squeaky floor.
I will move at the end of my lease. I am so pissed about this because I specifically asked the landlord if it was quiet and she said, yes, you can hear a pin drop. Total BS. I guess she figured if she disclosed the fact that you can hear every friggen step of the people above me, she would never rent the place.
Your neighbor is just moving around his apartment and not creating noise intentionally while you on the other hand are creating noise intentionally by yelling/using your broom. Who is in the wrong here? Not everyone works 9-5 in a city that is alive 24/7.
Just last night my wife got home from a trip at 11pm. She gets in, takes off her shoes immediately, but we're moving around putting her suitcase in the living room and getting ready to sleep, plus our cats get all excited that she's home and start running around (they're 10lb cats, so not huge).
What do we get, but our downstairs neighbor banging on the ceiling and yelling at us to be quiet.
I'm sorry, but if you live in a building with bad sound transmission, either learn to live with ordinary noise or move. In this particular case, the guy above the OP may have been partying, but 99% of the time I've heard people yelling or using the broom, it's just because of ordinary noise.
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