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Okay, I agree with the opinion on the attitude but again, what's the difference between the OP's mother's entitled "spend money on me" attitude and the OP's entitled "spend money on me" attitude?
OP has already illustrated that cards plus flowers given randomly by her children out of loving concern are not enough and that "more planning" is deserved.
Okay, I agree with the opinion on the attitude but again, what's the difference between the OP's mother's entitled "spend money on me" attitude and the OP's entitled "spend money on me" attitude?
OP has already illustrated that cards plus flowers given randomly by her children out of loving concern are not enough and that "more planning" is deserved.
How is the attitude any different?
The OP is the one who started a thread?
I don't know where you are going with this. And I don't believe anyone said that they were different.
Okay, I agree with the opinion on the attitude but again, what's the difference between the OP's mother's entitled "spend money on me" attitude and the OP's entitled "spend money on me" attitude?
OP has already illustrated that cards plus flowers given randomly by her children out of loving concern are not enough and that "more planning" is deserved.
How is the attitude any different?
They're the same, although the OP insists she's the nicest most selfless person ever, and her mother is a complete shrew. Lack of self-awareness showing -again. A few posters, myself included have pointed pout how she's just like her mother. Ungrateful & spoiled.
I don't blame OP for not wanting to do much for her mother. And wouldn't blame her kids should they not care to do anything for her. Both of them are hard to please, and can always find things to complain about.
I don't know where you are going with this. And I don't believe anyone said that they were different.
I'm not sure I understand.
You said you wouldn't want to do for the OP's mother considering her (the mother's) attitude and I was pointing out that the OP is displaying exactly the same attitude (spend a lot of money on me).
Not sure what you're confused about but if you have any other questions about what I said, let me know?
The reason I pointed it out is that the OP doesn't really have a leg to stand on if her attitude is what you stated - that she doesn't want to do for her mother because of her mother's attitude - since that's the OP's attitude as well but the OP is defending it in her own (the OP's own) case.
Hope that clarifies. I was pointing out the hypocrisy there, nothing more. It's a fairly straightforward concept but as I said, if you have further questions let me know and I will try to answer them for you.
You said you wouldn't want to do for the OP's mother considering her attitude and I was pointing out that the OP is displaying exactly the same attitude (spend a lot of money on me).
Not sure what you're confused about but if you have any other questions about what I said, let me know?
The reason I pointed it out is that the OP doesn't really have a leg to stand on if her attitude is what you stated - that she doesn't want to do for her mother because of her mother's attitude - since that's the OP's attitude as well but the OP is defending it in her own (the OP's own) case.
Hope that clarifies. I was pointing out the hypocrisy there, nothing more.
I think you misunderstood their post. They were saying if they had a mother who acted like the OP, they wouldn't want to do anything.
So it was
If I had a mother like her -the OP.
Not
If I had a mother like her's. or If I had a mother like her mother.
I think you misunderstood their post. They were saying if they had a mother who acted like the OP, they wouldn't want to do anything.
So it was
If I had a mother like her -the OP.
Not
If I had a mother like her's. or If I had a mother like her mother.
Oh! I understand.
The OP's kids do want to do things for her, though. They may not forever, due to her attitude. But they do for now and IMO it should be enough...that's JMO though.
The OP's kids do want to do things for her, though. They may not forever, due to her attitude. But they do for now and IMO it should be enough...that's JMO though.
Yeah. Agreed. her kids do things for her, which is nice. But OP still complains. So it'd be karmic justice if they stopped doing anything for her when they got older. I wouldn't blame them if they didn't do anything now. Unless the OP is a grand actress and she doesn't display the spoiled attitude to her kids like she does on the forum.
Yeah. Agreed. her kids do things for her, which is nice. But OP still complains. So it'd be karmic justice if they stopped doing anything for her when they got older. I wouldn't blame them if they didn't do anything now. Unless the OP is a grand actress and she doesn't display the spoiled attitude to her kids like she does on the forum.
It will probably happen. This is likely as not a family pattern. Children try their hardest to please an unpleasable parent because THEN the parent will be happy, THEN the parent will just love them. But when those children start really growing up, well...they just become numb. Mom will never be pleased, full stop...so it's time to stop trying...and to start resenting.
It's sad. OP, check this well. No parent is perfect, we all screw up. But if you blow off - even subtly - your kids' GENUINE efforts to make you happy because "nobody" stepped up to the plate to also do expensive things for you, you're going to crush that giving part of them and you're going to start losing them.
My children are young. I think it should be the moms that are actively parenting now that should be rewarded. Not the ones that gave up parenting 25 years ago. Heck I raised my brother.
You sound very bitter.
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