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All you have to do is fill out your tax returns in february saying that no one can/will be claiming me as an independent. This, of course assumes you work, which I assume you do, at least part time.
You should let your parents know ahead of time, though, that this is your plan.
You don't need to get married to get the low income status and qualify for pell grants.
Forget student loans that have to be paid back until you have used all the grants you can get. Grants are free money. If you do your own taxes, you should be fine. This may disappoint your parents because they currently use you as a tax deduction.
I also agree with some of the other posters that community college is a fine place for you to develop your language skills to better prepare for university. This is not wasted time. I went to university in another country and I wish I'd had more time to become truly fluent before jumping in to college level classes. I had to work much harder than native speakers.
Student loans is not a valid reason to marry. And it's also true that if you have to 'ask' you are too young. Why not let your fiance's parents pay for her to get an education? Wait and marry when she finishes school. 2 educated people will always do better than 1.
So dress it up as blessing or whatever, but it boils down to 2 guys transacting over a woman.
How lovely for you.
I wish I could get myself worked up into feeling bad about this. I guess I was caught up in the moment that I was marrying the man that I love and my parents were thrilled for me. I should have adjusted my focus to try to find something negative in the situation.
When my grandfather came to ask for my grandmother's hand in marriage in 1917 (they had been courting secretly), her father picked him up and threw him out the door. He kept coming back; finally her father said yes, probably because he was getting tired of throwing him out.
I wonder if many guys today would have come back for another try, never less many more tries. I guess that's why their marriage lasted so long.
I have a son.
If his GF/fiancee came to us and said that, it would be wonderful.
Rereading what I wrote, maybe it would be a sweet thing for her to do and say. The thing is, the way a protects and cares for a man is different than the way a man does. Right?
So basically you are getting married at this young age to avoid 40,000 dollars of college costs. That is the difference between 20,000 and 60,000. Wow. So if someone told me to get married and they would pay me 40,000 dollars I would never do it. I mean come on this is not something you do on a whim to avoid some fee for school this is real life and it can have much higher costs that 40,000 dollars. You are basically with this person for life. If you ask me which you aren't I would tell you to finish school. Actually my advice to college students is pretty much the same as always never buy things you have to make payments on while your in college. And never get married in college. While I was in college those two things led to more students I knew dropping out of school than any other thing. Mainly getting married and someone deciding they needed to work full time or someone buying a new car in school and needing to work full time to make payments.
1. Do you need to ask their permission? Many consider that outdated. I would be very upset if a man asked my parents' permission to marry me. I'm not their property. Have you talked to your girlfriend about that?
2. Appeal to their religion and the fact that you want to make an "honest" woman out of her.
So basically you are getting married at this young age to avoid 40,000 dollars of college costs. That is the difference between 20,000 and 60,000. Wow. So if someone told me to get married and they would pay me 40,000 dollars I would never do it. I mean come on this is not something you do on a whim to avoid some fee for school this is real life and it can have much higher costs that 40,000 dollars. You are basically with this person for life. If you ask me which you aren't I would tell you to finish school. Actually my advice to college students is pretty much the same as always never buy things you have to make payments on while your in college. And never get married in college. While I was in college those two things led to more students I knew dropping out of school than any other thing. Mainly getting married and someone deciding they needed to work full time or someone buying a new car in school and needing to work full time to make payments.
He's marrying her because he loves her, and the financial thing is only affecting the timeline.
When my husband proposed to me, he said that he had asked my father for his BLESSING, not his permission. I was 24 yrs old, supporting myself and a 2 year old. My parents already liked him, but that made them love him even more.
He did it out of respect and assured my father that he would take good care of me and my child. Now, we have both always worked full-time, so he didn't mean financially. But emotionally, I have always felt taken care of.
Same here. He asked because it was tradition. He also knew they would give their blessing. The OP needs to consider that his GF's parents might not give their blessing. What then?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mattie
Are the girlfriend's parents helping with her college? I'm curious as to whether or not that is part of the reason the OP wants their approval for the wedding.
Good question. I would imagine, once married, they'd be on their own financially. If it were me, I might continue to pay college tuition for a married adult child, but that would be it.
I know what im getting into as far as getting married young, please no lecture on the fact that we are young.
Basically me and my girlfriend are wanting to get married before transferring out to a university. We have been together for over 2 years. very dedicated, we love each others so much we wouldn't imagine the world without the other, even though at some point we didn't know the other's existence.
We already know we will get married. i know that she is the one and she knows im the one and we have no doubt. no relationship is perfect and we know that. but my parents make over 200k a year and they will not help for college. nor will they cosign for a loan. i cannot be approved for a loan on my own unfortunately.
upon reading and researching i have found that in order to obtain financial aid i would need to become independent. this will also allow me to be eligible for federal loans.
2 ways to become independant for FAFSA (Not for income tax which is different requirements)
1. be over 24 years old. problem with that is i am 20. and i will not take a 4 year break of school, i think that is irresponsible and who says i would ever go back and not get used to a restaurant manager's salary which i am. that type of salary is eventually not going to be sufficient to provide for a future familly like i want. therefore this option is not an option. also i would be kicked out by my parents and have to live on my own on a bad wage.
Or
2. Be married. this option seems to make a lot of sense especially since we already want to get married but not now because society says not to. but We know we do. we know we are made for each others. i want to emphasize on the fact that we are not getting married for financial aid, but rather as an additional advantage. marriage Motive should ONLY be for Love
It would reduce our combined student debt from around 50-60k to between 0-20k . i know how big debt can impact a relationship and sometimes it gets ugly. stress combined with trying to start a career and learn how to manage your money and pay bills can be very overwhelming.
if we get married we would go to school and live on campus at the apartments , very affordable which i have made a budget and we would still have over 600$ left over after all bills, food, groceries.
but all i am asking is how should i talk to her mom and how could i get her to understand and hopefully grant me permission, BTW her family is very religious and judgemental. i wouldn't be here asking for that question if they weren't. one important thing to mention though is they love me very much, they say that i am a blessing to my girlfriend but not only her to her family as well. (they have not said that to me, but have said that within the family)
You are too young to be married and LOVE IS NOT NEARLY OR REMOTELY ENOUGH OF A REASON to get married, much less the ridiculous pragmatic reason that confronts you. You are making a mistake and that's that.
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