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I am a guy (title says it all) and have this female friend at college. Which of the following is considered appropriate? Keep in mind that we're just friends, not interested in dating each other.
1. I told her that I would like to meet her brothers, sisters. You know, we're all in the same field, so we could network.
2. I want to go over to her house, get to know her family, have a nice chat. Or vice versa: my parents and brother could introduce themselves to her if she comes over to my house.
3. I want to watch a movie together (just us two, going to the cinemas)
4. We are friends on facebook. She is a Catholic, I am a conservative evangelical Christian. We have a friendly discussion about religion. She tells me that her (married) sister is also an evangelical Christian. So I send a facebook message to her (married) sister, introducing myself: "Hey, your sister and I are friends, had a nice chat about religion. You and I have similar religious views. Maybe you could introduce your sister to evangelical Christianity." (Gee, I'm half afraid that her husband will be jealous and thinks I'll do something with his wife...not that I would do anything like that).
I know these may be weird questions, and some of them may be obvious, but not to me. Keep in mind that except for my mom, I do not have a single female relative within 7,000 miles of me, all my other friends are guys (I'm an engineering major), and thus I have no (other) female friend to turn to for girl advice.
Side note: my friend is a very tomboyish computer science major, but is straight. She also has Asperger's, like me.
I am a guy (title says it all) and have this female friend at college. Which of the following is considered appropriate? Keep in mind that we're just friends, not interested in dating each other.
1. I told her that I would like to meet her brothers, sisters. You know, we're all in the same field, so we could network.
2. I want to go over to her house, get to know her family, have a nice chat. Or vice versa: my parents and brother could introduce themselves to her if she comes over to my house.
3. I want to watch a movie together (just us two, going to the cinemas)
4. We are friends on facebook. She is a Catholic, I am a conservative evangelical Christian. We have a friendly discussion about religion. She tells me that her (married) sister is also an evangelical Christian. So I send a facebook message to her (married) sister, introducing myself: "Hey, your sister and I are friends, had a nice chat about religion. You and I have similar religious views. Maybe you could introduce your sister to evangelical Christianity." (Gee, I'm half afraid that her husband will be jealous and thinks I'll do something with his wife...not that I would do anything like that).
I know these may be weird questions, and some of them may be obvious, but not to me. Keep in mind that except for my mom, I do not have a single female relative within 7,000 miles of me, all my other friends are guys (I'm an engineering major), and thus I have no (other) female friend to turn to for girl advice.
Side note: my friend is a very tomboyish computer science major, but is straight. She also has Asperger's, like me.
Is this because guys shouldn't talk to married women? Or is it because religion is a controversial topic?
You don't even know her. A message like that is simply too personal and pushy. Concentrate on getting to know the girl first. Leave her family alone unless she introduces you to them on her own accord, not you pushing.
The side note should be at the top... The following situations were mostly eye popping, but the note explains where you're coming from.
#3 is best.
#1 & #2 seems really odd. Usually these things happen organically but it seems like you're trying to force it.
#4 is thoroughly inappropriate. I... think you're trying to make a joke... Hopefully. Religions is one of the topics you really shouldn't be broaching with those you don't know and it can be highly misinterpreted. This case, (if it is a joke) it falls flat and seems disrespectful.
No offense but you sound cluless and, as others have said, pushy. I'd tell my sister to stay away from you just based on these interactions. You seem like the type of guy they eventually make Dateline episodes about.
And I say this in all seriousness, you're clueless and a bit creepy.
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