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Yep. Lose the negativity, Roger. I didn't read any laughter or appreciation in your post.
If your in-laws really are deadbeats, 40 years is long enough to know to stop counting gifts and calling them names and just take the situation for what it is.
This. You know these people. Whatever they do should come as no surprise. And this goes for your wife too. She shared your comment. IMO, she should have kept your comment private.
You don’t have to give your in-laws money for Christmas, right? Perhaps it is time to reevaluate things.
Am I understanding correctly that your wife told her mother what you said? That's a violation of your trust, and I'd be pissed. Unless all she did is tell her that you like JC Penney shirts.
.... What is worse is that my MIL is just as much of a deadbeat as her other 4 kids, and all the money she used to buy the gifts came from mine and my wife's checking account!
Quote:
Originally Posted by MI-Roger
By giving my MIL $400-$500 so she could buy Christmas presents?
By not raising a fuss it was our two sons who receivedno gift from their Grandmother
Chagrin means humiliated, and you and your two sons have just been roundly humiliated by both your wife and your mother in law so I can definitely understand why you're feeling chagrined.
Hopefully your wife won't share your comments with her mother again in the future but just to be on the safe side, since you can't trust your wife to keep her mouth shut it might be wise for you to keep your own mouth shut from now on when wife wants to discuss her mother with you.
I'd be annoyed if the purpose of you giving her the money was so she could get gifts for everyone else and she gave gifts to 3 other grandchildren but never gave your own children any gifts. That's just plain wrong and I think you should have at least questioned your wife about why her mother did that. Did your wife suggest to her mother to not get anything for your own kids? If she did then she should have at least given your two sons some advance warning to not expect anything from their grandma so they wouldn't have to feel humiliated and confused by being left out at the gift exchange.
Personally, if I was in your shoes I wouldn't be giving the MIL any more money again to buy gifts for other people. Was it just your wife alone who decided to give her your jointly shared money, or was it something you both discussed and agreed on?
For that matter I wouldn't be having a joint chequing account with my spouse either, I don't care how long the marriage has lasted or how good a marriage it is. Having a joint account is taking a trip on the road to discord and disaster.
By giving my MIL $400-$500 so she could buy Christmas presents?
By being appreciative I received a gift that I can use?
By not raising a fuss it was our two sons who received no gift from their Grandmother?
By being able to still laugh at situations such as this after 40 years of being the son-in-law?
As the title says this is Christmas Chagrin, not the Norman Rockwell Hour.
How old are you? You must be in your 60s, and your MIL in her 80s.
Grow up already.
And when you give people money, it's now their money to do with as they please.
I get it, it's funny in a dysfunctional way.
I bet she treats the Christmas money as a gift from your wife, like you have nothing to do with it.
Reminds me of the Christmas my mom boasted about getting a great deal on bracelets for her daughters-in-law, then gave the same to me. My sister got something expensive.
Lord & Taylor's "Black Brown 1826" store brand is also by Joseph Abboud and is cheaper than full-price retail at Joseph A. Bank, so I'd try there.
These shirts are what all the fuss is over? Lord have mercy
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