Not wanting children

[Aconite]

Originally Posted by deevel79

I'm literally the ONLY person on both sides of my family who is over the age of 25 and doesnt have any children, and quite frankly, i'm very happy about it.

I'm currently 32yrs old and in a commited relationship with a woman who is 8yrs my elder who currently has a 19yr old son and is also not interested in having another child. When my family asks me why I dont want any children, my response is "in my opinion, the cons outweigh the pro's". From a financial standpoint, having a child puts a heavy strain on your finances. Although we both make a pretty good living, I prefer to keep my money and spend it on things that we both enjoy doing. We vacation 3-4 times a year. Eat out a few times a week. If a time comes when we're at home and just want to spontaniously get into the car and take a ride somewhere, we have the privilage of doing so. etc... I very much enjoy the freedom of not being obligated to care for a child. The funny thing is, the family members who are most vocal about my decision to not have children are the ones who are ALWAYS complaining about thier kids and saying how hard it is to raise a child. They criticize me for my decision, yet it also seems as if they envy me at the same time. They constantly say things like "you're going to be a lonely old man with no kids to come visit you".

All in all, i'm content with not having children at the moment, and dont see myself wanting to have any ever.

The only answer you really need to give is that it simply isn't something you're interested in. You don't owe them an explanation any more than they owe you one for having children.

I will say that the "I have such a fascinating life because I have toys instead of kids" argument is as irritating as the "I'm so noble because I want kids instead of toys" one probably is to non-parents. Neither is a better, more fascinating, or more enlightened choice. They're just different ones. My sisters enjoy my kids, my kids enjoy their childless/childfree aunties. I know when I call XXXX I won't be have to chat about diapers or homeschool curricula; they know I'm not prey to office politics. (We jokingly refer to one sister's dogs as my kids' cousins, but everyone in the equation knows it's a joke. They're dogs. My kids don't get heartworm and I don't have to follow them with baggies when we go out; they don't have to deal with trumpet lessons or orthodontia. There's no need for "the talk" at my sister's house, but spaying and neutering my kids is probably a poor idea. Though both my daughter and my sister's dog do have ADHD.)
Variety in family makeup works out for everybody.