The post I never wanted to make but knew I would (problems, Iowa)
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I think you missed the main point of NK's post: why must your retired-with-no-second-job husband be "conned" into accompanying his daughter to her appointment? This will be his grandchild, too...and it might provide some good father-daughter bonding time.
The girl is 19, why does she need mommy or daddy to go with her? Jeez, people. For all the b*tching people have done here about "letting go" there are sure a lot here that expect the OP and DH to hang all over her.
OK, I have to ask why people seriously think those sonograms pictures are cute. Come on. It looks like a picture of a broccoli casserole in the oven with the oven light on, taken through the over door.
The girl is 19, why does she need mommy or daddy to go with her? Jeez, people. For all the b*tching people have done here about "letting go" there are sure a lot here that expect the OP and DH to hang all over her.
Because an ultrasound is a serious diagnostic test and a big deal despite the fact that most people seem to think its only value is to determine whether the layette should be pink or blue. Somebody should attend the appointment with her.
Last edited by randomparent; 06-27-2014 at 12:27 PM..
Reason: Typo
The chance for tough love was lost YEARS ago. Agreed. but maybe they tried and failed. who knows. Neither you nor I do. Tough love can still be used here.
If you're pro-life take care of the life that is being formed.
SMDH. I have to leave this thread because my disgust that a baby would be the object of your game playing is so palpable I can barely breathe. Maybe you'll find someone saying, "Poor Ivory. Yes. You have good ideas. She deserves to sleep in a car and live off welfare. That will teach her!" I think you'd like that.
Yet I'm guessing you are perfectly fine with aborting the BABY? Don't you find that MORE disgusting than her feeling that she needs to try and teach her daughter responsibility for her actions?
Because an ultrasound is a serious diagnostic test and a big deal despite the fact that most people seem to think it's only value is to determine whether the layette should be pink or blue.
She's a big girl, she can go on her own if the bf won't go.
The girl is 19, why does she need mommy or daddy to go with her? Jeez, people. For all the b*tching people have done here about "letting go" there are sure a lot here that expect the OP and DH to hang all over her.
Because it's her first baby? Because it's her first trip to the OB and first ultrasound? Because her situation is pretty precarious? Because something might be wrong? Because she's probably anxious about the procedure? Because she's likely to become very upset if something is wrong, and be in need of a caring family member to get the scoop on just what the doctor said about the situation and the treatment? Because she may lack reliable transportation?
These are all practical concerns. As her pregnancy progresses, presumably and I hope, normally, she should not need anyone to habitually accompany her to the doctor. But for her first visit - yes, she should have someone caring and competent with her. Has nothing to do with expecting her parents to "hang all over her".
She's a big girl, she can go on her own if the bf won't go.
If she finds out something is wrong, like I did sixteen years ago, she will need someone to support her and to provide a second set of ears. It happens. Fortunately, not often, but please don't underestimate the potential for bad news.
Right now she's working one job which is a major improvement over no job. He's working two jobs. The only thing she qualifies for right now is WIC. When the baby is born she'll qualify for food stamps, medical insurance for her and the baby (she has to be on the same plan as the baby) and housing assistance.
I know there are programs out there but I also know how hard it is to be working full time with a baby. It will be several years before she's in position to go back to school. I hope she does as that will immensely improve her future. I don't see it happening any time soon though.
I'm trying to get her to take a couple of classes in the fall just to have a couple more out of the way.
You can't help her with school like you were before because.....???
Because it's her first baby? Because it's her first trip to the OB and first ultrasound? Because her situation is pretty precarious? Because something might be wrong? Because she's probably anxious about the procedure? Because she's likely to become very upset if something is wrong, and be in need of a caring family member to get the scoop on just what the doctor said about the situation and the treatment? Because she may lack reliable transportation?
These are all practical concerns. As her pregnancy progresses, presumably and I hope, normally, she should not need anyone to habitually accompany her to the doctor. But for her first visit - yes, she should have someone caring and competent with her. Has nothing to do with expecting her parents to "hang all over her".
You need to relax. Any of this can happen during any appointment. So, what you're saying is, she shouldn't attend any appointment alone?
And as for transportation, I don't think that is what the discussion is about. She's a big girl, now treat her like one.
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You need to relax. Any of this can happen during any appointment. So, what you're saying is, she shouldn't attend any appointment alone?