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I prefer not to say, but I am 100% positive. The person was in my immediate family and I lived with them at the time and was close in age. They had to write a letter and be approved to drop out by the principal of the high school. They were in 9th grade. They went to work as a full time nanny for special needs kids, which they received a special license for and was paid by the state (but that was when they were 15). When they were 16, they went to work at a grocery store and worked over time nearly every week (over 40 hours). They eventually got their GED and went to college.
This was early/mid 1990s.
No one has to believe that its true, but that doesn't change that it absolutely happened.
And also this isn't a 1+2=3 situation. Just because your parents over help you as a child, doesn't mean they won't be fully functional adults. And just because your parents make you do lots of stuff, doesn't mean you will be a great housekeeper, not lazy, etc. Its just an over simplistic way to think...and shows a lot of insecurity, IMO, in your parenting to think something like this will create a functional adult.
On the other hand, over doing for your kids can cripple them.
Growing up, my mom was a SAHM and we did very little in terms of chores. We didn't do laundry or wash dishes. Our room would be messy and eventually, we'd clean it, but that's about it. When I got older, I also took care of the roof. Our house was so tiny and she did most of the stuff around the house because she didn't really do anything outside of the house---fine, that's her prerogative, I guess.
Somehow, I manage to do chores today. Sure, my husband washes the dishes (the one thing I really hate) and usually makes dinner (because of our scheduling) but I don't mind doing the laundry, paying the bills, vacuuming, etc. If people have to, they will---of course, you could just find someone to enable you the rest of your life.
My issue around this is that the parents should not have to spend the majority of their free time doing most of the chores around the house while the kids get to sit around playing video games or watching TV.
My issue around this is that the parents should not have to spend the majority of their free time doing most of the chores around the house while the kids get to sit around playing video games or watching TV.
Everyone should be pitching in appropriately.
I think I agree, but I had far more free time than my sons did. They went to school, played varsity sports, and held part time jobs. As long as they took responsibility for their rooms and bathrooms, I had no problem handling the rest of the house. Nor did it bother me to close their bedroom doors to hide the mess until they had time to deal with it.
I just don't think it's imperative for kids to cook and clean to understand how the process works.
I graduated high school 20+ years ago, and at the time you had to be 16 to drop out. I doubt they have lowered it.
Anyway kids now are too pampered and useless because most parents do everything for them and when they have to do it they are deer in headlights
This was 20+ years ago that I am talking about. You needed to be 16 to just withdraw on your own (I don't know if you needed parental consent). But you could drop out before that if you wrote a letter and proved you had special circumstances (i.e. needed to work full time, were having a baby, was the child of a migrant worker) and have your parent sign off. I know one person well (again a close family member) who did it for financial reasons. I knew a couple girls more distantly who did it because they were having babies at 15.
I do think its a little insane that a principal of a school and a parent would allow a child at 14 to drop out of school. But it worked out well for them in the long run and they are successful.
My issue around this is that the parents should not have to spend the majority of their free time doing most of the chores around the house while the kids get to sit around playing video games or watching TV.
Everyone should be pitching in appropriately.
I agree with this. For me, it's not so much about teaching them skills for adulthood. None of this is rocket science, and I'm pretty sure that my kid, as an adult, can figure out how to operate a washer and dryer and wash dishes when she feels compelled to learn. I didn't learn to cook until I moved out my mother's house. I didn't starve.
It's more about each person contributing to the household. We all live here. We all do our share. One person shouldn't have to do everything while everyone else sits and watches. Being part of anything, whether a community or a family, means pitching in.
Mine could be considered a large family, 6 total. My main goal is for my children to learn how to do things themselves and be self sufficient. I am also not a maid, so we all pitch in a do what needs to be done so everyone (myself included) could have some down time. It would not be fair for me to be doing chores while everyone is sitting around. The only person that gets a bit of slack is my husband, and it has nothing to do with being the only man in the house but everything to do with his schedule.
At home everyone is able to feed themselves and other, do general cleaning, take out the garbage and put away laundry.
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