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OP, you already sent a message to the school that you will not push them too hard on this issue. This has been going on for 7 months and you are worried about offending the teacher? When my son was in 1st grade, he got punched by a kid in a kindergarten at the bus line. After a second such incident which he had to go to a school nurse, I called the superintendent and made it very clear that we will not tolerate this behavior. I also told her next time this kid punches my kid, my son will punch him back and since my son is older and bigger, it will probably not end well for the little bully. That was the end of it. Only you can protect your child. I am hyper-sensitive about this issue because I was bullied in high school and know how painful it is. Your daughter is young but once she is tagged as bully material, it will keep happening. You have to put a stop to it right now.
I haven't read all of the comments, so I hope I am not being repetitious. When my daughter was bullied in 2nd grade, a little boy gave her a note saying that he was going to throw her through a table. I immediately met with the principal and told her that if she didn't handle it, I would get a juvenile officer from the police department to talk to him and his parents. She decided that it would be a good idea to have a police officer talk to the boy and his parents, because she too was concerned that he might hurt my daughter.
It nipped the situation in the bud, because the school did not want to be liable for his behavior and his parents were mortified. Please, speak to the principal and let him/her know that you will not tolerate this continued behavior. Take it to the PTA or Parents' Board if your school has one, but don't let the situation continue.
(My husband was close to going ballistic at the thought of someone threatening his little girl and was ready to pitch the boy and his parents through a table if they hurt her. It took more effort to calm him down, than calmly going to have a meeting with the principal!)
We have spoken several times with the teacher after the kicking and abuse. She stated she would be watching him closely to ensure there are no problems.
Well that's obviously hogwash.
First, I can't believe a teacher wouldn't snatch that kid up by the scruff and handle the little perv's behavior at the very HINT of impropriety.
Second, given the history, how is it he's allowed anywhere NEAR your daughter??
Third, "watching" does not ensure anything. Even if she WAS watching, which she either isn't or she is and allows it to happen.
Glad you're going to the principal. They don't always love their teachers. This is a disaster.
I hope you can give a good timeline for the exact events in writing when you meet with the principal.
My kindergartner has also come home with stories and injuries from his classmates. Last week a child scratched him with a pencil breaking skin. My mother is a retired teacher, and she took him to school the next morning to meet with the principal. She specifically asked if my son was in a class with all the bad kids.
Now we live in a very expensive, upper middle class entirely Caucasian area, and the principal said that they have lots of problem children. They have spread them equally among the classes.
So it sounds like it is a universal problem with discipline at home.
White, rich kids can also have problems?
Two main kinds of problems - neglected/mistreated kids and neglected/spoiled rotten kids.
There was a kid in my friend's kid's class. The "bully" attacked the other kids 27 times before anything was done. Why? Because the mom threatened lawsuit if her child was punished. The 28th kid that was attacked was the sherrff's daughter.
*ALL OF A SUDDEN* an aide was provided that sat with the kid ALL DAY LONG so he wouldn't hit/punch/kick/threaten to kill the other kids. $30K a year for the aide.
Sorry, if parents can't make their kids behave (baring developmental issues that should be taken care of in a special setting) they should foot the bill. $30K a year.
Parents can threaten all they want (now we know how bullies are created!), but there's nothing against the law in punishing a student by making him stand in the corner, or write on the board during recess 40 times, "I will not ________________", or to send him home. Why would a school give in to an empty threat? To avoid incurring a lawyer's fee? I doubt a parent would follow through with filing suit against a school that made her precious Johnny spend recess and part of lunch writing "I will not hurt other children" over and over on the board.
"
My coworker, who lived in my town, introduced me to her son, who was six at the time. She was helping at some town fair thing, and walked away. I said, hi, Steven, my daughter is going to be in kindergarten this year, same as you. The little ****er looked at me and said, "I could kill your daughter." I knew then and there something wasn't right with this kid, and I leaned in close to him and hissed, "and then I would kill you." He looked surprised, but I just stared him down for a minute and walked away.
By third grade, after he told his teacher he was going to cut her throat, he was sent to a special school in the county where they redirected these kids into wrestling and other controlled activities.
He came back for high school. When Virginia Tech happened, my dd said, "oh, if that happened at my school, it would definitely be Steven. He walks around the hall pretending he has a rifle and is stalking people."
I told her to keep away from him. His parents were nice, but they didn't take his behavior as seriously as everyone else did. He ended up joining the Marines. I know he served in Afghanistan, but I don't know where he is now. Far away, I hope.
Just watch out for this kid, OP. They don't seem to outgrow it.
Isn't it possible for them to put your child in a different classroom?
I can tell you right now that boys bullying girls, even beating them up, is common in schools and goes on even in high school. If this isn't taken dealt with now it could get worse, and the school needs to take it seriously. She should not be in the same classroom as him because he is a danger to her.
Two main kinds of problems - neglected/mistreated kids and neglected/spoiled rotten kids.
I had the same response to that post. I live in an upper middle class area in a county where some of the wealthier families are losing their kids to heroin and getting into other trouble.
Wait until her kids get to high school. It's a rude awakening and I thank God I survived those years and my kids are well on their way as adults.
OP, these are the messages you and the school are sending your daughter:
1. Mommy and Daddy can't, or won't, protect me.
2. Boys can do anything they want and get away with it.
3. Girls have to put up with whatever boys want to do to them.
4. No one will help girls who are being treated abusively.
These are the messages that will become ingrained in her, that she will take with her into adolescence and adulthood, to guide her in relationships, if nothing is done, and if you decide to wait the year out, because "it's just 6 more weeks". Is this what you and your wife want for your daughter?
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