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Most of the classes at community centers are geared towards younger kids or adults. Again, unless they can walk, trying to get to places to volunteer/attend classes is a challenge. This is a prime reason many posters on other threads have stressed that it is actually more important to try to be home with your older kids than with your babies if you have the opportunity to do so. I have been fortunate enough to live in an area that is within walking distance to places like rec centers where they can go to shoot hoops; my teens also occasionally spend time "hanging out" at Sonic or places. No smoking - language? Well, they are teens so I wouldn't be surprised at some of it. Probably not too loud though because they would be horrified if any of the parents heard if they were being a problem....But being the parent of teens, I have seen good kids take a (hopefully temporary) walk down the wrong path. I also know some of the stories behind why. Often times these are not inherently "bad" kids - just ones who are lost and trying to act tough. I remember being appalled as the parent of younger kids too- it's easy to judge then trust me....
Simple facts are kids who are taught no respect grow up to be adults who have learned no respect. It's not ok to hang around on playground equipment made for small and use foul language if a small child or chilren are around. If a teen sees a mom bringing a young child to play they should move on to a more age appropriate area of the park. It really isn't too much to ask. I know most parks have benches, basketball areas and such which are great, age appropriate areas for teens to hang out.
I find it interesting that all the posters on here complaining that teenagers are horrible and not respectful are the ones who are AGAINST just talking to them in a respectful manner. Either call the police, threaten them or just avoid the situation all together seems to be their thought process. How do you think kids learn? Perhaps these kids haven't been taught any better or perhaps they are just teens in their own little world, unaware that they are bothering anyone. Who knows...but it seems to me rather than complain about it, call the police or threaten them, start by setting the example (for them AND your own kids) of dealing with a situation calmly and maturely first. What a concept.
Last edited by maciesmom; 06-29-2009 at 11:50 AM..
Reason: punct.
We visited some family in Des Moines recently and visited a large park. There were a couple of big kids who appeared to be monopolizing the swings, not even swinging on them, but throwing the seats high into the air. My aunt and grandmother were tsk-tsking to one another and a couple of the other moms about how it was such a shame that the big kids had "taken over." My younger children wanted to swing, so I went over to talk to the boys. I had my "kind but authoritative" face on, as you say. Turned out the swings had been wrapped around the upper pole a few times, and the boys were UNDOING it. They were trying to be helpful. One of them disappeared to find a big stick so we could unhook one of the swings (one of the chains had been caught on a bolt, so it wasn't level), while the other pushed my son on the swing so I could push my daughter.
I so agree that regarding 12, 13, 14, 15 being a tough age. My son is 15 and had a winter job at a ski resort, but hasn't been able to get one this summer.
Like I said before, even the most polite teens can be incredibly obtuse and it usually doesn't occur to them, until someone says something, that they are causing a problem, such as hanging out on the swings.
I know many who have little ones and no teens yet think there is no way when their child is that age that they will ever curse....bad news...they may not in front of you, but the stories I hear from school and what goes on/what is said. I guess you could put them in a bubble. Does it make it okay to do it in front of little ones/others in general? No. But they don't really think along those lines.
I think some are in for a major shock when they have teens....
I have a son who is respectful, gets good grades, opens doors for others, etc. But I also know what goes on when they doing stuff on their own. They can be bones heads - they are teens - it's part of the growing up/learning process. I know we all expect them to act appropriately because it seems obvious, but it's not for them.
Yes, I do get testy when "adults" discuss threatening/harming/shooting kids. Sorry, that's just me I guess.
So, in other words, your weapon, legally concealed in your purse or carried on your person would automatically invoke "respect" because people would just know you had it without you showing it or bringing it up? Great. NOW I understand completely.
ETA - I have nothing in the world against weapons provided they are used properly, in the right circumstance. Threatening kids at a park is not one of those times. Now, if said kids violently attack someone and you are there, that is another story all together but that is not what is being discussed here.
Which is why I put the clarifying clause, "If you live in an open-carry state..." Open carry means unconcealed.
But you still have to "show" it to get the reaction you're hoping for. Or you could just speak to them..AGAIN, all we're talking about here, in this thread, is kids "hanging out" not defacing public property, threatening or attacking anyone....hanging out....it may be distasteful but it doesn't warrant standing there with your unconcealed weapon looming in it's holster and staring them down.
Which is why I put the clarifying clause, "If you live in an open-carry state..." Open carry means unconcealed.
Ahh, so the kids will believe that if they don't shape up, they're going to get shot. That's just a bluff, of course, because you can't shoot them for simply being noisy or in the way. Good thing there's no way a teenager would know that.
And what a pleasant lesson for the little ones...."don't bother dealing with people sweetie, just show your big, bad gun and they'll do whatever you want"......Yep, that's great.
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