Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
wow i had no idea this thread would get so heated! and as far as the "where else do they have to go" well for one there is a large basketball court right there WITH bleachers that they could sit around on and won't interfere with other people actually trying to USE the equiptment, oh and a skate park too...............nobody said they should go hang around the mall! now i never said i would START an argument with these kids all i said was i could see that happening if i asked them to move and they got nasty with me. i think that would be upsetting toward my son so i'd rather avoid it alltogether. as far as like i said i wouldnt call the cops over something that simply got on my nerves. i believe scarmig was joking people, jeeeeeez people need to have a since of humor! oh yes and i never said my son wouldnt ever curse either, that's unreasonable, all i was saying is that i would make sure he had better things to do with his time for instance sports or something more constructive than sitting at a playground.
Location: Stuck on the East Coast, hoping to head West
4,641 posts, read 11,941,823 times
Reputation: 9887
Quote:
Originally Posted by jkcoop
I so agree that regarding 12, 13, 14, 15 being a tough age. My son is 15 and had a winter job at a ski resort, but hasn't been able to get one this summer.
Like I said before, even the most polite teens can be incredibly obtuse and it usually doesn't occur to them, until someone says something, that they are causing a problem, such as hanging out on the swings.
I know many who have little ones and no teens yet think there is no way when their child is that age that they will ever curse....bad news...they may not in front of you, but the stories I hear from school and what goes on/what is said. I guess you could put them in a bubble. Does it make it okay to do it in front of little ones/others in general? No. But they don't really think along those lines.
I think some are in for a major shock when they have teens....
I have a son who is respectful, gets good grades, opens doors for others, etc. But I also know what goes on when they doing stuff on their own. They can be bones heads - they are teens - it's part of the growing up/learning process. I know we all expect them to act appropriately because it seems obvious, but it's not for them.
He/She clearly then goes on to use words like "threaten"...I personally don't feel threatening kids with a gun (even in a holster) at a public park is an appropriate way of dealing with them. These are 12 and 13 y.o. kids from what you originally said. Not 18-20 y.o. gang members. The worst that would probably happen is they would be mouthy back. Fine - leave and make a report to parks and rec.....
sounded like a joke to me (if it wasn't that is pretty disturbing) but yes i totally agree with you as far as it not being appropriate to threaten them..........maybe their parents. lol.....JUST A JOKE PEOPLE!
The answer to both of your latter questions is yes. A playground is for smaller kids, and the equipment is geared for smaller kids. Once the kids become older (some playgrounds will have signs saying the equipment is for children 5-12 or in that general range), they need to find something else to do rather than hang at a playground. Especially if they are sitting on equipment that they are too big for, and preventing smaller children from using it. Especially if they are disruptive and vandalizing and misusing the equipment. This issue has nothing to do with unfair perceptions of teenagers. It has to do with teen-agers who are acting disruptive. I don't think the original post comes off as viewing teens as monsters.
The OP did not say anything about vandalizing equipment or misusing it, merely that they were there and preventing her kids from using the equipment. Let's not add things that were not there in the first place.
My suggestion is merely that she attempt to talk to the kids prior to giving up all hope that her kids can use the park and certainly prior to calling the police.
There has been a loss in civility in the US. You can see that loss of civility when people are quick to call the police on a bunch of kids hanging out in the park BEFORE attempting to speak to them and see if the problem can be fixed in a friendly manner. If the kids are nasty AFTER being asked nicely, certainly call the police but it seems a lot more civil to try to ask before taking drastic action.
yes and i allso said i wouldn't call the police either. the way these kids were talking (around other adults and myself) it doesnt seem like they would hesitate to cuss me out for asking them to leave, that is why i would avoid the situation alltogether and i would rather find something else for me and my lil guy to do than to have him watch me get verbally abused. its just not worth it, like i said i'll be getting a pool or playground for my backyard.
It is a shame that many kids have nowhere to go during the day in the summer. I would think that camp or summer recreational classes or going to the local community center would be the best bet. They could volunteer somewhere if they can't get a job. I spent a couple of summers at a writing camp when I was a teen. I certainly wouldn't want my 14 y.o. hanging out all day w/o supervision while I work. I agree that there should be more activities for them.
There is a real problem in my community with the 13-15 year olds. Most day camps take the kids until age 12 and most want kids to be 15/16 to be counselors so the tweeners often have nothing to do. Jobs for 15 year olds used to be plentiful but they are nowhere to be found this summer.
My oldest (15) got a non paying internship so he has a "job" of sorts but my middle (13) has had a hard time finding activities. We found a sports camp that takes 13/14 year olds and he went a few weeks to music camp but that is over for the rest of the summer.. Hopefully he will like that camp. I don't mind him being home for a few hours but I don't like him home all day with nothing to do when I am working all day.
yes and i allso said i wouldn't call the police either. the way these kids were talking (around other adults and myself) it doesnt seem like they would hesitate to cuss me out for asking them to leave, that is why i would avoid the situation alltogether and i would rather find something else for me and my lil guy to do than to have him watch me get verbally abused. its just not worth it, like i said i'll be getting a pool or playground for my backyard.
My comments were directed towards the person I was responding to and not to you.
I realize that you have said that you would not call the police. I do think that it would be ok to ask them to leave. I think you would be setting a good example for your kids if you stood up for yourself (and for them) instead of being so terrified of a bunch of middle school kids.
I do think you seem like a very reasonable person and that people are projecting things into the situation that you did not say.
terrified? yes people are projecting things into the situation especailly saying i'm terrified of them. all im sayin is i know what's worth taking a stand for and what is simply worth walking away. i don't argue with teenagers, there is no point, what difference will that make? do i think these kids will whoop my butt? no i hardly think so! not terrified by these kids, a little disgusted with their behavior.
terrified? yes people are projecting things into the situation especailly saying i'm terrified of them. all im sayin is i know what's worth taking a stand for and what is simply worth walking away. i don't argue with teenagers, there is no point, what difference will that make? do i think these kids will whoop my butt? no i hardly think so! not terrified by these kids, a little disgusted with their behavior.
I can understand being irritated with them. Nearly everyone is irritated with teenagers.
But if you are not afraid of them in some way why wouldn't you just ASK them to move? I wouldn't argue with them either, but simply asking them to move doesn't have to turn into an argument. If they do not respond the way you like you can still leave. But at least you will have tried to allow your kids to play on the playground. I am not understanding your unwillingness to even try to talk to them. That is where I get terrified. If I am wrong I'm sorry.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
