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Nope, didnt see it... not even a little bit. I work 75 miles away, so my round trip communte is 150 miles per day. My car broke down on this very day, I have been struggling to get back and forth to work on the train until my car comes out of the shop on Tuesday... that will cost abt 2200.00, so all this happened on the same day. I was at work on the phone with her... pleading with her not to do this. Let me get home and work it out. There are too many things off balance right now... Please give me a minute but all that was to no avail... so I have alot on my plate right now and I can work with all the other stuff, but this is super overwhelming.
I'm not saying it would be easy--I know I'd be crushed. I was just trying to give the OP some hope that just because her daughter acted rashly, it doesn't mean that all is lost.
Nope, I was not thinking along the lines of leveraging anything. The fact of the matter is I was prepared to help my daughter with whatever she needs, for however long she needs. I have always been opened ended with my children. Turning 18 does not mean anything to me... You don't stop being a parent when they turn 18. I am still helping my 28 and 31 year old when they need it. Thats the whole purpose of family I feel. To provide help and support, so it is really hard for me to understand her throwing me away like this.
That is how I feel too. I wonder if she'll come to her senses in a few days and come home. Maybe she'll at least have a calm, rational adult conversation with you. I hope she comes to her senses. Good luck!
Hope is a good thing but the OP needs to care for herself. It is hard not to take it onto your shoulders when it is your child. I mean how can we not feel like a failure at this time?
Let yourself grieve, she is a different person now. I think my mistake was not realizing that we were not on the same track as far as her future. She is doing well but we will never be as close. More like acquaintances. Tend to your marriage, I sure raged at my husband for many weeks. Did no good, only caused resentment.
I really appreciate all of you comments and thought about this. I am gonna go on the hope that both my daughter AND her BF realize that it would be a huge loss for both of them to NOT have me in their life. Neither one of them have any reason to be mad with me.... this is SUPPOSED to be all about my daughter and her Dad. I am a very positive, results oriented person and I get things done. My daughter has dropped the ball many times with school, grades, life etc. and each time I pick it up and hand it back to her to start again on the right track. I am hoping she will give me the opportunity to help her and get her straightened out and back on track.
Do you and your husband bring a united front? This will be important. Also do not deny your hurt. I think it is appropriate to let her know you are a person with feelings. You are not a doormat. This issue with your husband was not the catalyst. Maybe just the excuse. She should have to work a bit to earn your help. Notice I did not say not to do anything necessary, just do not let her know that is what you are willing to do.
Now my daughter has no money, no job, has not graduated from high school yet and her boyfriend is getting unemployment
Most likely you'll get her back and whatever babies are produced in the relationship and you'll be expected to financially support them all and you and your husband will be expected to provide free babysitting services.
Most likely you'll get her back and whatever babies are produced in the relationship and you'll be expected to financially support them all and you and your husband will be expected to provide free babysitting services.
OUCH but true ..
:; sighs:; Your daughter is 18 .. a legal adult .. let her learn how to be a responsible one as well ( job school ect ) Saveing her is the wrong thing IMHO.. she chose this road.. let her walk it ..
eventually you two will work it out ..
step back and wait .. AND dont call the other parents either .. not yet any ways ..
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