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Sadly, some schools put out some thing saying that a kid must invite everyone in their class.
If invitations are sent by mail or handed out off school grounds it isn't the business of the school to decide who or how many are invited to a child's birthday party.
I have always believed it is better to have a handful of close friends over than kids your child doesn't have anything in common with.
The only party my daughter has had was when she was 8. She invited her 3 closest friends to go to a pizza place for games and pizza.
how about to be polite so no one feels left out when the kids inevitably talk about it at school??
And typically, that rule only applies IF the invites are distributed AT SCHOOL. If you don't want to invite the whole class, you use the phone, the mail or email....
how about to be polite so no one feels left out when the kids inevitably talk about it at school??
If only a few kids are invited and go, there isn't anything to feel left out about. I'm sure each child would be invited to their closest friend's parties, so ultimately no one is left out of the parties that would be important to them. Each child would most likely end up at 3-5 parties a year. That's plenty.
There was literally no way to attend every party my son was invited to. Some where at the same time. Some were total girl parties with girl activities (my 3 year son would act up at a princess story-telling party for instance).
The best parties we went to were parties that were for the parents, too, and had alcohol. I know, I know, judge me because I enjoyed a glass of wine at a 4 year old's birthday party. But, I'm telling you, The Dallas County Club, a clown, a monkey, an open bar - very memorable.
If only a few kids are invited and go, there isn't anything to feel left out about. I'm sure each child would be invited to their closest friend's parties, so ultimately no one is left out of the parties that would be important to them. Each child would most likely end up at 3-5 parties a year. That's plenty.
I agree about a few parties/year being plenty, but not all kids have a lot of friends. There are always the more popular kids who would be invited to more parties, and the more shy kids who wouldn't be. Someone would feel left out. My point is there are reasons for inviting everyone other than trying to get more presents. Fortunately my older son's b-day is in the summer so no discussion at school. younger son's is the first week of school, so that's a little more complicated.
If birthday parties are connected to every child in any given classroom, why don't the mothers get together per month and plan one big party for all those celebrating in that month? Have the party in the classroom on a Friday afternoon or the parents rent out somewhere. Since it's EXPECTED (according to rkb0305) that kids be at all parties for everybody in their classroom, it would make more sense then a half dozen parties in a four week period. At the close of school, they can have a party for all those classmates who have birthdays in the summer.
That way, when the birthday comes around the family can have a quiet celebration.
And typically, that rule only applies IF the invites are distributed AT SCHOOL. If you don't want to invite the whole class, you use the phone, the mail or email....
Problem is if the parents don't always know the other kids phone number, address or email. My daughter started a new school this year. Her birthday was before any school directory came home so I did not have that info. I tried to find one mom after school one day but could not so my daughter took it to her the next day at school. No biggie. Even when I got my daughters directory there were a good number of students that did not have their contact info in there.
I still say if the kid hands the invite to their friend before/after school and that friend puts it away immediately in their backpack it is NO BUSINESS of the schools what it is. If and when the schools want to step up and pay for the birthday parties then they can dictate who can be invited to MY childs birthday party that I am paying for.
So what if a few kids at recess decide they want to have a slumber party and one kid says it can be at their house. Then the rest of the day when not working they are talking about this "party" at one of thems house and who is coming. Should the school then ban the kids from discussing such so no one is left out.
It is not like the kids are going around handing out an invite to everyone but 1 or 2 kids. If a kid has 4 invites to their closest friends that they have sat down and gone over w/ mom/dad on who they can invite then there are very few that are going to be left out. Most of the class is not invited.
If birthday parties are connected to every child in any given classroom, why don't the mothers get together per month and plan one big party for all those celebrating in that month? Have the party in the classroom on a Friday afternoon or the parents rent out somewhere. Since it's EXPECTED (according to rkb0305) that kids be at all parties for everybody in their classroom, it would make more sense then a half dozen parties in a four week period. At the close of school, they can have a party for all those classmates who have birthdays in the summer.
That way, when the birthday comes around the family can have a quiet celebration.
I never said that! you said the only reason for inviting everyone was to get more presents. I pointed out another reason - not letting some kids feel left out. Don't put words in my mouth!
If birthday parties are connected to every child in any given classroom, why don't the mothers get together per month and plan one big party for all those celebrating in that month? Have the party in the classroom on a Friday afternoon or the parents rent out somewhere. Since it's EXPECTED (according to rkb0305) that kids be at all parties for everybody in their classroom, it would make more sense then a half dozen parties in a four week period. At the close of school, they can have a party for all those classmates who have birthdays in the summer.
That way, when the birthday comes around the family can have a quiet celebration.
You run into all kinds of things then like is the school in control and such. Then if the school came in and said it had to be done this way the parents are going to expect the school to foot the bill. They barely have the money to operate now and trying not to cut teachers.
Then what if Sarah wants a princess party and Billy wants a camo party. Or Brian wants a skating party and his parents would have to do TWO parties so that he can do the skating one and he is still going to invite his friends. Or Julie's grandparents want to be at all of her birthday parties no matter where they are.
Or Tommy has an ortho appt on the day of the big party right after school. Or Emily was out sick. Or...........................
There are just WAY TOO MANY things that can go horribly wrong with something like this.
In our schools the parents can send up cookies or cupcakes for the kids in their class to have at the end of lunch for their kids birthday celebration.
I agree about a few parties/year being plenty, but not all kids have a lot of friends. There are always the more popular kids who would be invited to more parties, and the more shy kids who wouldn't be. Someone would feel left out. My point is there are reasons for inviting everyone other than trying to get more presents. Fortunately my older son's b-day is in the summer so no discussion at school. younger son's is the first week of school, so that's a little more complicated.
Ok, but life isn't equal for anybody. There are always going to be kids not invited for overnights, visiting friend's houses, etc.. Things are never equal and it's wrong for kids to think it is or should be.
Wouldn't it be better to leave those out who aren't really friends than to invite them and have them ignored or talked about while there behind their backs because they aren't so popular with the birthday girl/boy?
I'd rather my child not be invited to someone's party if she isn't real friends with her/him and go to the parties of those who is close to.
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you said the only reason for inviting everyone was to get more presents. I pointed out another reason - not letting some kids feel left out. Don't put words in my mouth!
