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No, please read more carefully before you respond. I said the specific things you mentioned, which I repeated in my response, would be nonsensical in my church. I don't know if they would in the OP's church. The point that you seem to be dodging is that volunteering does not make up for a financial loss unless the in-kind donation replaces a cost.
First I don't care about your church as it wasn't relevant to my comments so I'm sorry for getting that mixed up. Secondly the idea of replacing the 230.00 monthly with labor was not from the perspective of making the church whole but rather allowing a member to provide some service instead of donation to help said member.
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And YES, you've got it, that was my point--the church's financials might very well be in bad shape. The financial situation of many churches are. I gave my own as an example--an 85K per year budget would be definitely affected by a $3K loss. Something would not be able to be paid for. The OP might be concerned about affecting her church's finances, if that is the case. She mentioned that her parents live in a somewhat unsafe area. I'm thinking that her church isn't a shining beacon of wealth in a poor neighborhood.
It is not the responsibility of a single person in a bad financial situation to continue on that path to benefit the church. I don't care about the finances of the church as they did not create a thread asking for advice because their situation was a mess. If the church started a thread and stated they were drowning in debt I'd give them specific advice but that's not what's going on here
First I don't care about your church as it wasn't relevant to my comments so I'm sorry for getting that mixed up. Secondly the idea of replacing the 230.00 monthly with labor was not from the perspective of making the church whole but rather allowing a member to provide some service instead of donation to help said member.
It is not the responsibility of a single person in a bad financial situation to continue on that path to benefit the church. I don't care about the finances of the church as they did not create a thread asking for advice because their situation was a mess. If the church started a thread and stated they were drowning in debt I'd give them specific advice but that's not what's going on here
No one said it was the responsibility of single person in a bad financial situation to rescue the church. But the OP has clearly stated, several times, that she doesn't want to give up the tithe, and people are questioning that choice. I am saying that HER PERSPECTIVE might be one of not wanting to renege on what she promised--and pointing out that the volunteering everyone thinks is a great replacement for money may not be a real solution.
Again, we don't know because the OP hasn't said. She probably should have just forgone even mentioning that she tithes, lol.
This has been an excellent thread. Plenty of good suggestions. I'm always amazed at the number of posters who are quick to be mean and disrespectful to someone asking for advice. OP, kudos to you for recognizing your dilemma and making steps to correct it. I admire your commitment to your tithing even if I don't agree with it. Good luck with the plan.
I agree. OP isn't exactly drowning in debt, but she is paddling really hard to stay afloat. She has gotten a lot of good advice and seems very open to taking it.
No one said it was the responsibility of single person in a bad financial situation to rescue the church.
Then it's not a productive counter argument that they might need the money
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But the OP has clearly stated, several times, that she doesn't want to give up the tithe, and people are questioning that choice.
While completely fine it doesn't help fix her drowning feeling so offering other suggestions such as volunteerism while cutting out the tithing would help. If the OP is uninterested in the additional suggestion that fine as well
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I am saying that HER PERSPECTIVE might be one of not wanting to renege on what she promised--and pointing out that the volunteering everyone thinks is a great replacement for money may not be a real solution.
Again, we don't know because the OP hasn't said. She probably should have just forgone even mentioning that she tithes, lol.
You also created the scenario whereby the church needed the money from her when she didn't indicate that was the case. Tithing is one of her larger expenses so it should be included in a financial Im drowning discussion
Then it's not a productive counter argument that they might need the money
While completely fine it doesn't help fix her drowning feeling so offering other suggestions such as volunteerism while cutting out the tithing would help. If the OP is uninterested in the additional suggestion that fine as well
You also created the scenario whereby the church needed the money from her when she didn't indicate that was the case. Tithing is one of her larger expenses so it should be included in a financial I'm drowning discussion
No, as I said, I was speculating in an effort to help others understand a different possible point of view and clearly indicated that. I have no more comment on the matter. If the OP wishes to return and address it-or not, that's her choice.
No, as I said, I was speculating in an effort to help others understand a different possible point of view and clearly indicated that. I have no more comment on the matter. If the OP wishes to return and address it-or not, that's her choice.
You did create the scenario through your speculation
To those who are "tired of the harping about tithing":
Since OP is so adamant about not lowering the amount (or stopping it completely), she should not have mentioned it at all. She could have easily left it off her list of expenses and adjusted the amount of her income accordingly. By including tithing in her list of expenses and asking for help/advice she invited suggestions and discussion.
To say people are harsh, mocking, and critical of her choice to spend a large amount of money on the church is preposterous.
To those who are "tired of the harping about tithing":
Since OP is so adamant about not lowering the amount (or stopping it completely), she should not have mentioned it at all. She could have easily left it off her list of expenses and adjusted the amount of her income accordingly. By including tithing in her list of expenses and asking for help/advice she invited suggestions and discussion.
To say people are harsh, mocking, and critical of her choice to spend a large amount of money on the church is preposterous.
Yep, that's what I said.
Let that be a lesson to tithers everywhere considering a "Financial Advice Needed" thread on City-Data!!!!! {{JARRING CHORD}}
I'm 30 years old and I don't know how to adult. I moved in with my parents in January for a year and they make me pay bills. I haven't saved a dime. (I know I suck as a person because of this. )
Some background info:
I make about $2300 a month. The problem is, I have about $26,000 of student loan debt.
Navient - $3,500 - 6.8%
Nelnet - $22,500 -6.8%
**Navient is in deferment until May and Nelnet is in forbearance until August.
I also have a car loan of about $21,000. My car was bought new. It is a 2015 Honda Civic. I have to drive a lot for work, so I needed something reliable.
Car Loan - $21,000 - 1.9%
I have really good credit: 740
That's all concerning my debt.
My monthly expenses starting in April will be:
$240.00 - Tithes
$400.00 - Car Note (It's actually $374, but I pay the extra $26 to make it an even $400.) $400.00 - Rent for parents
$$115.00 - Car Insurance
$140.00 - Gas
$120.00 - Food $135.00 - Cell phone
$25.00 - Life Insurance
$22.00 - Gym (My parents live in a pretty rough neighborhood, so walking around outside for exercise isn't an option.)
$10.00 - Job fee $100.00 - Dry cleaners
$200.00 - Dental (Saving to have major dental work done)
$200.00 - Saving for moving out
$80.00 - Navient
$110 - Nelnet
This virtually leaves me no room for anything. I live paycheck to paycheck. I literally feel like I'm drowning and I've lost many nights of sleep over this.
Someone, please help me.
Well first off why did you have to get a new car? You could have bought a reliable used Honda.
What on earth are you dry cleaning? You can wash and iron your own shirts.
Life insurance? You're not married and you have no children, no one is dependent on you for income, if you die while people will be sad, no one is going to go hungry.
A $135 a month for a cell phone? That's crazy. T Mobile has smart phones for $140 and you get 4 months of service with that included.
I think your parents since you have put yourself in a bad way should forego the rent for now. But you need to make changes as well.
Do your parents have a two story house? Stairs is a great way to exercise.
Thanks for all of the replies everyone. When I first posted this, I was NOT expecting to receive this much advice. You all have been tremendously helpful.
UPDATE:
Cell phone: My new bill will be lowered to $45 at the end of my current monthly bill (March 17th). Gym: My new gym fee is $13 Life Insurance: Gone. Dry cleaners: Out Food: (Not eating out, just groceries) $60.00
Now, let me address the many other concerns and issues that you all wondered about.
1.Tithing: I am not going to completely stop tithing. Period. Thank you all for your concerns and opinions. There's no changing my mind. I will lower my tithes by $10 by paying the exact 10%. Every little dollar counts, right?
I have no church pledge for tithes. I'm simply tithing based on my income. (Or I will be in the future.) My church isn't forcing me to tithe. Honestly, my church won't be hurt if I don't tithe but I do think my tithing helps. I hope that makes sense. Please understand that tithing is completely my choice.
I did include tithing in my original post. In hindsight, like a lot of my financial choices, this was a mistake. I wish I could go back and edit, but I can't. So please, let's just all move on.
2. Work: I've posted so much personal things on here already, I would like to keep this private. I hope you all understand. I will say that the poster asking about social work is in the right neighborhood.
3. Job dues: This is a monthly fee for Birthdays and Holidays for my co-workers and I.
4. Degree: I have a Bachelor's degree and I am working in my field of study. There is little growth in the area I'm in and I'm looking to move around and/or leaving this field completely.
5. Retirement: I am contributing to a retirement saving through work. This means virtually nothing though as I don't plan on working at my job long enough to be vested.
I hope I've answered some of your questions.
Again, thanks for your help and I look forward to giving more positive updates on lowering my debt.
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