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Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,748,461 times
Reputation: 41381
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Species 8472
Not really. If you're trepidatious about having kids, then think of it as going on a roller coaster. You may be scared to go on the coaster but once you've experienced the ups and downs, turns and twists, you're glad you've done it, but then they'll come a time when you don't want to get on that coaster ever again. For some folks, it's one kid; for others, ten kids.
My own mother made it seem like being a parent was a drag and got in the way of what she really wanted to do in life. That didn't stop her from living the life she wanted - without me. She worked full time, went out with friends or on dates (she was divorced) and went on week long vacations without me. She made it clear that having me around was a burden and got no enjoyment out of the relationship. She really made my childhood unhappy. This was my role model of how to be a parent and I thought that I did not want to be as miserable as she was because of having a child.
I also don't have much extended family (nor does my husband) so I would have little support and guidance in helping raise any kids. Me and my husband would be on our own.
I did not want to be pregnant. I am not good with blood and gore and pain and I don't like to visit doctors unless absolutely necessary. I have 2 friends who nearly died in childbirth and that confirmed my fears of giving birth. That would still leave adoption for me or step parenting, if I felt the need to be maternal but...
I don't find most things about raising children enjoyable. It's just not something I am interested in doing. Just as I am not interested in being a dentist, a lawyer or financial analyst, I am not interested in being a parent. Why do it then?
I love animals though and so my husband and I can devote our free time and money to animal rescue activities, and to feeling financially secure in our retirement - in the future.
. Sitting at boring soccer games or second-grade dance performances or listening to shrieks of "Look at me" at the beach. Listening to constant child babble or childhood videos or music over and over. .
I would totally agree. Snore fest. But I have been majorly surprised at how everything my kid does totally fascinates me.
Yes. But.
The thread is aimed at people who do not want children- notice the title. I never post on the parenting forum unless it is something related to mental health, where I do have experience (and usually DM someone rather than post) or when it is a thread about whether or not to have children or something like that, where it is appropriate for non-parents to participate. I also usually out myself as a non-parent-by-choice and thank the forum for allowng me to post.
I suggest a refreshing review of the title of the thread.
People who complain about children, put down parents, or whatever your thing is, who are then drawn to parenting forums have something else going on with them. There's no other way to see it.
Quote:
Originally Posted by steelstress
Don't get your panties in a twist. This forum isn't restricted to parents only.
See above. None of you are in a position to assume the experiences, feelings, or thoughts of another human being- independent of the topic. It's absurd. That anyone would even spend time in that space is something I cannot grasp. "Get a life" is what comes to mind for me.
People who complain about children, put down parents, or whatever your thing is, who are then drawn to parenting forums have something else going on with them. There's no other way to see it.
See above. None of you are in a position to assume the experiences, feelings, or thoughts of another human being- independent of the topic. It's absurd. That anyone would even spend time in that space is something I cannot grasp. "Get a life" is what comes to mind for me.
I'd have to agree. This topic would be a psychologists delight.
"I don't want kids, I hate kids, I despise parents.....ooh I know, I'll hang out in Parenting forums all day". Funny, weird, peculiar.
See above. None of you are in a position to assume the experiences, feelings, or thoughts of another human being- independent of the topic. It's absurd. That anyone would even spend time in that space is something I cannot grasp. "Get a life" is what comes to mind for me.
Right. I think it's terrible that people come to the parenting forums to put down parents, put down kids, and generally insult, but it's about my shortcomings. Okay.
I scan a number of forums where I don't post to see if there's anything of interest. For instance, I am not a doomsday prepper but I am curious about what people say there, sometimes. As a vociferous childfree person, I scan the parent forum for any threads, as I said, that relate to non-parents; just as this one is addressed. I fail to see hate and bias against parents in my posts and in most from non-parents. For the peace of the group, I think I'm finished responding to this one particular poster as I think we've both said the same thing more than once and it's apparently not sinking in.
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Well then, I see where your shortcomings lie.
