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As an expecting mom, I truly have no gender preference that I hoped for, praying only to have a healthy baby.
My SO has agreed with me, that it doesn't matter if our child is a boy or a girl, all that matters to him is good health. But... I have a sneaking suspicion he wants a son. If a boy, he would be his namesake, and he has also said he has a "feeling" that the gender is male.
Any and all fathers or future dads out there, did you or would you hope for a son? Knowing that, of course, you would love your child whether boy or girl, would you feel a twinge of disappointment if you found out that the gender is not what you suspected and/or hoped for?
I didn't care either way. My father was upset that we stopped have kids and he didn't get a grandson. I can see his point of view, but I don't regret the decision.
I do know one guy who wanted a boy. When I asked why, he said so he could take him hunting and fishing and dirt-biking. I have no idea why he thought he couldn't do those things with a daughter. Weird, considering his doctor wife is the primary breadwinner in the house.
I've told him, all those father-son activities can be father-daughter activities just the same! I am wondering how to deal with it if he is disappointed, if he would even admit it to me, if it is something he would want to talk about, or just come to terms with on his own? I know he will love our child no matter what. I just want to see him get excited about the prospect of having a daughter!
Location: Visitation between Wal-Mart & Home Depot
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hollygolightly
As an expecting mom, I truly have no gender preference that I hoped for, praying only to have a healthy baby.
My SO has agreed with me, that it doesn't matter if our child is a boy or a girl, all that matters to him is good health. But... I have a sneaking suspicion he wants a son. If a boy, he would be his namesake, and he has also said he has a "feeling" that the gender is male.
Any and all fathers or future dads out there, did you or would you hope for a son? Knowing that, of course, you would love your child whether boy or girl, would you feel a twinge of disappointment if you found out that the gender is not what you suspected and/or hoped for?
When my wife was pregnant and I would be asked something like "Are you hoping for a boy?" my response was always "I'm hoping for a healthy baby." It was a genuine sentiment, I certainly would not have been crestfallen to learn that I was about to be father to a daughter.
When the OB pointed out some junk on the ultrasound, I became extremely, extremely excited. Like to the point where my wife called me out. "I thought you said you would have been happy to have a girl!!"
I think that just about any 1st time dad is truly rooting for footballs moreso than pom-poms in his heart of hearts. If our first had been a girl, there may have been a moment of "Oh well" or something equally benign, but a baby girl is no less wonderful than a baby boy.
Quote:
Originally Posted by hollygolightly
I've told him, all those father-son activities can be father-daughter activities just the same! I am wondering how to deal with it if he is disappointed, if he would even admit it to me, if it is something he would want to talk about, or just come to terms with on his own? I know he will love our child no matter what. I just want to see him get excited about the prospect of having a daughter!
The guys who are really psycho about having a boy (you know, the guys whose wives are calling their friends in tears because they are worried that their husbands are not going to love the baby if it's a girl - which is ridiculous in itself, btw) and wind up getting a girl have the real problem. Those guys invariably become so tightly wrapped around their daughters' fingers that they turn into mush, become completely ineffective and lose all credibility as the authoritative parent. If you have one of these husbands, be prepared; you will have to be the hammer to your husband's velvet glove for the next 18-22 years.
Don't get too hung up on seeing him get excited about the prospect of having a daughter before you deliver. You'll get everything you want when you see the look on his face when he holds his baby for the first time, boy or girl.
I've told him, all those father-son activities can be father-daughter activities just the same! I am wondering how to deal with it if he is disappointed, if he would even admit it to me, if it is something he would want to talk about, or just come to terms with on his own? I know he will love our child no matter what. I just want to see him get excited about the prospect of having a daughter!
Oh but fathers are funny when they get their first girl.
My story. With my first I wanted a boy because there are so many girls in my family and I got a girl. Next time I wanted a girl after all I didn't know with a boy but I had the girl babies all figure out. Yep I got a boy. And, oh boy, is he a "mama's boy"!. He tells me that I am pretty and gives me kisses every day.
My dh said he didn't care but somehow he got stuck on a girls name. He wouldn't budge on the name so I think he wanted a girl. There are more boys in his family. He is also better at playing with barbies than I am.
I would have been happy either way. In the event, it was two sons.
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!. He tells me that I am pretty and gives me kisses every day
