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The very first time I heard about this was from my neighbor. Several years ago, his male friend was going out with his date on a club. He suddenly felt dizzy and only wakes up to see himself tied up and having sex.
He was a then 20 year-old and till this day my neighbor tells me he's all messed up to the point he refuses to date and has become distrustful. He doesn't want to report and is ashamed to say it was his date, a woman.
I told one of my friend this and he told me that it should only be considered rape if a fat and/or woman or another guy does it. I don't know. But I still think if it's something against your will, you feel violated and they're still having sex with you, it's rape to me. Though not sure how a court would classified this as since it's not penetration.
Another I'm wondering is how did that woman still got him hard? This I don't get. If we're drugged then wouldn't we still be soft.
So if rape happens to a guy is the aftermath as strongly as it were if the rape were female? The friend I told shared this to told me that guy should get over it esp if the woman was pretty. And then proceeded on saying that if he still got an erection then he wanted it. Lastly, why would a woman want to rape? A rapist does it because he's sick and wants power and control but what purpose would a female rapist have?
You're right; trauma is trauma. Being overpowered and forced to do an intimate act against your will is traumatic. It causes PTSD in males and females. Men and boys can be raped by penetration, as well. Same reaction. Look at all the cases coming to light through the Catholic Church and private boys' schools. People end up messed up for life.
Tell your neighbor that his friend should seek treatment for PTSD. He'll feel a lot better after that gets resolved. His life will get back on track. There are simple and highly effective methods for treating PTSD today. He can Google that and/or "trauma counseling" to find someone in his area to help.
This woman couldn't have tied him up all by herself. There must have been accomplices? Had he known the woman before, or was it a first date? It's impossible to guess her motives.
This woman couldn't have tied him up all by herself. There must have been accomplices?
This is what I was wondering too. I think this was premeditated and her helpers probably knew what she was going to do.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth
Had he known the woman before, or was it a first date? It's impossible to guess her motives.
It was a first date. It was some girl he chatted a couple days before until meeting her for the first time. This is what makes her motives even weirder. If it was an ex bf or someone she knew then maybe it might have been for revenge but this was a total stranger.
He can be, but no rape victim has the same after-effects so it depends. Also, the fact that he is a man might become part of the problem for him, that it was an attack on his manhood so to speak.
It was a first date. It was some girl he chatted a couple days before until meeting her for the first time. This is what makes her motives even weirder. If it was an ex bf or someone she knew then maybe it might have been for revenge but this was a total stranger.
She could have just been kinky. If she had some resentment, maybe for being molested as a kid, or raped, that wouldn't answer the question, "Why THIS guy? Why right then?" Or does she do that to all the guys she dates? Very strange.
He should report it, and your neighbor should go with him for support. The reason being, that she may be a serial offender. He could have a chance to spare other guys the trauma and humiliation.
He should also DEFINITELY get treated for the PTSD. I can't stress that enough. Good luck to him!
So if rape happens to a guy is the aftermath as strongly as it were if the rape were female? The friend I told shared this to told me that guy should get over it esp if the woman was pretty. And then proceeded on saying that if he still got an erection then he wanted it. Lastly, why would a woman want to rape? A rapist does it because he's sick and wants power and control but what purpose would a female rapist have?
What a sad statement to made by your friend. A sexual violation is a sexual violation. Also, the victim was drugged! It was not consensual. It is much like the ugly statement that some people make regarding women who get raped. "She asked for it because what she was wearing." Really I didn't realize that there was a rape section or such a clothing line on the market.
It sounds like your friend is having trouble dealing with the trauma inflicted on him. He needs professional help. He did not cause it and did not ask for it. He is no less a man because a woman did this to him. He was drugged and then sexual assaulted. I hope he can get beyond the shame and pain to receive help.
OP is way off.
Sexual arousal is fairly mechanical. The betrayal of the victim's own body is further torment.
Also, why would you think a female would have a different motive for committing rape?
What's so sad is he might have enjoyed intimacy with her if she was normal, but then rape isn't about that. She's a sleazeball criminal who needs to be locked up. The effects of even one rape are far-reaching. So sorry for the victim. I hope he heals.
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