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The only thing that a mental health pro ever told me that I actually held onto and remembered... A school psychologist when I was in high school, the only adult I'd run into who had the stones to actually call me out on my BS at the time. He was a salty old man from New Jersey, thick accent and all... He told me once,
"Lie to other people if you feel like you have to. Lie to me, I don't care. But do NOT lie to yourself."
Another one I recall that has resonated for me throughout the years is, "Wherever you go, there you are." Meaning that if the struggles you are having come from within, then changing external factors won't solve anything.
Oh, and Patton Oswalt's tribute to his late wife, her saying, "It's chaos. Be kind." I love that.
The first one is (restated): You have only one job in this life: to improve yourself and become aware enough that... (I'll leave the conclusion of that phrase to you.)
The second one was popularized as a movie line in a science fiction flick "Buckaroo Banzai' but is Buddhist in origin and often quoted by a Buddhist friend. Personally, I more like the quote of a friend of his: "Life in the body. Root toot, root toot." Reflect upon it for a while, examine the different inflections and possible meanings and it is even more profound.
"Be kind" is a phrase with different backstory, depending on where you are in personal development. There are any number of wisdom teachings that bring more clarity there. Iidries Shah's wife's ancient tales was a good place to start.
"You're shy."
When a psychiatrist told me this, it was like a light bulb going on. Suddenly my anxiety about being around peopke and my avoidant behaviors made sense. It wasn't that I was a bad or inferior person because I wasn't as social as my friends, I was just shy. I now accept myself as I am and allow myself to have the space I need without judgment.
Funny, looking at your smiling profile picture, you don't seem to be "a shy, low-drama introverted bookworm".
Funny, looking at your smiling profile picture, you don't seem to be "a shy, low-drama introverted bookworm".
It just goes to show you that an online persona can be quite different from the actual human being behind the keyboard. Also, I think a lot of us shy people learn how to fake it when we're around others. I have a mental trick that helps me when I'm in a social situation that makes me uncomfortable, like a big party. I pretend I'm an actress playing the part of a character who is extroverted. Then I try to behave as I think that person would. It helps loosen me up, but it's also draining. I can only keep the act going for so long. At some point I need to get away and recharge.
The first one is (restated): You have only one job in this life: to improve yourself and become aware enough that... (I'll leave the conclusion of that phrase to you.)
The second one was popularized as a movie line in a science fiction flick "Buckaroo Banzai' but is Buddhist in origin and often quoted by a Buddhist friend. Personally, I more like the quote of a friend of his: "Life in the body. Root toot, root toot." Reflect upon it for a while, examine the different inflections and possible meanings and it is even more profound.
"Be kind" is a phrase with different backstory, depending on where you are in personal development. There are any number of wisdom teachings that bring more clarity there. Iidries Shah's wife's ancient tales was a good place to start.
I have seen that movie, my memories of it are somewhat vague but I remember finding it to be delightfully silly.
In my teen years I'd pretty well decided that I didn't want anything to do with mainstream Christian religion, but I had a deep desire for philosophy, and after lightly perusing and discarding a bunch of popular woo-woo alternative faith systems, I decided simply to embrace concepts that resonated as I found them, and get on with my life.
I've encountered Jewish people who described bits of philosophy that I loved. I've encountered a whole lot to love in Buddhist philosophies as well.
At a young age, I listened to a book-on-tape of "Jonathan Livingston Seagull" and as an adult I was gifted a copy by a beloved Aunt. I read it again every few years. I can't think of a specific quickie quote that leaps out at me, but the overall idea of rejecting limitations and meaningless clutter-ideas that distract us, and just setting out to be the best self you can, with kindness and love at the core... Well, it was a big influence.
To pivot a little bit from big, philosophical ideas and point to a phrase that has helped me deal with everyday life as an adult with ADD, and one who cannot abide the meds... "Break it up into manageable pieces." That's helped a lot. Husband gave me that, though he likely did not originate it on his own. Any time I am faced with anything overwhelming, I break it up into small pieces and deal with them one at a time. It helps a lot.
I have seen that movie, my memories of it are somewhat vague but I remember finding it to be delightfully silly.
In my teen years I'd pretty well decided that I didn't want anything to do with mainstream Christian religion, but I had a deep desire for philosophy, and after lightly perusing and discarding a bunch of popular woo-woo alternative faith systems, I decided simply to embrace concepts that resonated as I found them, and get on with my life.
I've encountered Jewish people who described bits of philosophy that I loved. I've encountered a whole lot to love in Buddhist philosophies as well.
At a young age, I listened to a book-on-tape of "Jonathan Livingston Seagull" and as an adult I was gifted a copy by a beloved Aunt. I read it again every few years. I can't think of a specific quickie quote that leaps out at me, but the overall idea of rejecting limitations and meaningless clutter-ideas that distract us, and just setting out to be the best self you can, with kindness and love at the core... Well, it was a big influence.
To pivot a little bit from big, philosophical ideas and point to a phrase that has helped me deal with everyday life as an adult with ADD, and one who cannot abide the meds... "Break it up into manageable pieces." That's helped a lot. Husband gave me that, though he likely did not originate it on his own. Any time I am faced with anything overwhelming, I break it up into small pieces and deal with them one at a time. It helps a lot.
Your last paragraph reminds me of something one of my daughter's (ADHD, LD) play therapists told me, "You are not an unlimited resource."
First is from Jonathan Livingston Seagull, by Jonathan Bach:
“Don’t believe what your eyes are telling you. All they show is limitation. Look with your understanding. Find out what you already know and you will see the way to fly.”
Taught me how to think outside the box.
Second is from...I don't know WHO.
" The more I learn, the more I realize, how little I know."
Keeps me humble...
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