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I agree that it's boring. For me, I never do dinner on the first date. I try to do something that is outside of the normal dating manual.
I didn't start doing dinner at restaurants with any frequency until I married.
Quote:
Originally Posted by th3vault
I find it best to play it safe for a first date. Dinner is an acceptable treat (rather than looking cheap), isn't really a distraction to conversation and allows a lot of talking, questioning and getting to know each other. Since the first date is mostly about evaluation, this works well. And if we can't enjoy each others company without some external activity, then the chemistry probably isn't there.
I do get more creative on later dates.
I don't find dinner at restaurants to be all that conducive to a getting to know you type conversion. Maybe I'm just slow, but looking at the menu, and then the eating, gets in the way of talking. Coffee and a walk, or even a drink, seems like it would be easier. I recall being outside quite a bit when I was dating. With that said, I know eating can be an important social event for humans. I figure if we're going to eat, lets pack a lunch and hit a trail or go kayaking, or bring some groceries to the local park (there are usually grills with picnic tables). Of course, there are those who are not out-doorsy types.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Freedom123
What in particular is nauseating or is a "fail" about my embracing of egalitarianism instead of feminism?
Eh, the anti-feminists on this board. I'm pretty sick of the lot of you, hence the nausea.
If you're going to quote people, quote them accurately. Cherrypicking is a very poor debate tactic.
Thank you. It's one he uses frequently here. Very annoying, and it paints an incorrect reference for those that have not read the entire thread. Of course, that's the point.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Yzette
AGAIN, there is a difference between a first date and an established relationship where people cohabitate. When both partners work full-time, both partners do housework. If one person works and the other stays home, then the other keeps the house. Who is the breadwinner and who stays home (male or female) doesn't matter. I have a few girlfriends who are the primary breadwinners. One has a husband who stays home and sells sports memorabilia on-line (not full-time work by a long shot), while she pulls in six figures working at a law firm. You'd better believe he keeps house. They have cats and you'd never know it. He keeps the place so clean, you can practically eat off the floor.
You like to bring up my marriage. Apparently you are fascinated with it. I was the breadwinner. Dang straight I expected my ex to do housework. If he worked and I didn't have a job, I would keep the place neat. That's the arrangement he has with his current wife, who stays home with their two kids.
But when both partners work full-time, both partners do housework, too. Really, it's not that difficult to understand.
EXACTLY. He ignores that fact because it invalidates 98% of his posts.
I didn't start doing dinner at restaurants with any frequency until I married.
I don't find dinner at restaurants to be all that conducive to a getting to know you type conversion. Maybe I'm just slow, but looking at the menu, and then the eating, gets in the way of talking. Coffee and a walk, or even a drink, seems like it would be easier. I recall being outside quite a bit when I was dating. With that said, I know eating can be an important social event for humans.
Eh, the anti-feminists on this board. I'm pretty sick of the lot of you, hence the nausea.
Yep yep yep. I've stated on here many times, dinner (or dinner/movie) is NOT a good first date...and generally best left for later dates after you know someone better. If I ever have to date again, I think that will be a rule of mine - no first dates that are over a meal!
Yep yep yep. I've stated on here many times, dinner (or dinner/movie) is NOT a good first date...and generally best left for later dates after you know someone better. If I ever have to date again, I think that will be a rule of mine - no first dates that are over a meal!
Ye gods, people. Some of you are acting like $30 for two at Friday's is some great expenditure that signifies either female disempowerment or male suckerhood. It's a meal, and if you can't afford that, then go sit in a park on a nice spring day with ice cream cones.
Holy crap, the drama and overanalysis on this thread is unbelievable. If I believed in a god, I'd thank him or her that I've never run into people who suck all the life and fun out of dating like this. Do those among you who keep tabs make your partners pay for their own meals when you take them out for their birthdays, too? Do you keep a running ledger of how much each meal you've paid for costs, run a tally at the end of the year, and demand payment for the difference if you were the one who paid for more?
What if you are with someone who makes half as much money as you do? Do you whine if that person can only take you to Friday's instead of Chez Fon-Fon? Do you then only take that person to Friday's because that's all they can afford to do for you, because that way it's "always equal?" What if that person can only afford to buy ingredients and cook for you? Do you never take that person anywhere?
And once you've been with someone for a few years, and that person has been by your side at weddings, funerals, and hospital beds, do you put a monetary value on that? Do you still keep tabs? Are you like this guy, keeping a balance sheet on the refrigerator?
I know. If these people weren't so sad, they would be funny. I have never, EVER, run into any man (or woman) like those portrayed in these threads over money. And I am so thankful for that!!
There are SOOOO many things to do, if they would just climb out of the box sometimes...and look around. Yanno? My first THREE dates with my current boyfriend - 1)2 games of putt-putt down at the beach 2) Howloscream at Busch Gardens and 3) a return to Howloscream (1 ticket got us 2 visits). We didn't have a single sit-down dinner date...for, gosh...I don't remember how long it was before we did that. Heck, by that time, we were exclusive.
Last edited by ChessieMom; 01-05-2012 at 05:16 AM..
There are SOOOO many things to do, if they would just climb out of the box sometimes...and look around. Yanno? My first THREE dates with my current boyfriend - 1)2 games of putt-putt down at the beach 2) Howloscream at Busch Gardens and 3) a return to Howloscream (1 ticket got us 2 visits). We didn't have a single sit-down dinner date...for, gosh...I don't ever remember how long it was before we did that. Heck, by that time, we were exclusive.
Sounds like fun. Frankly, I'll pass on the chain restaurants, outside the BBC , dating or not.
Ye gods, people. Some of you are acting like $30 for two at Friday's is some great expenditure that signifies either female disempowerment or male suckerhood. It's a meal, and if you can't afford that, then go sit in a park on a nice spring day with ice cream cones. ]
Eh, the anti-feminists on this board. I'm pretty sick of the lot of you, hence the nausea.
I don't see the problem if I'm pushing for equality and not at all interested in seeing women treated the way they were in the past. I simply have disagreements with the radicals and some of NOW's policies on child custody.
Girls pay by her vagina, make up, salon, nail and other bs
or equality
pay 50/50
What does this mean? I feel like its some ancient text found inside a cave.
If I pay for a date, in returns I get vagina, make up, a trip to a spa, and some other bs? Oh how neat.
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, dating or not.
