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I'm sorry, Mir... I'm really sorry for your generation in general.
What I do is probably not helpful... As you know, I like walking with my Johnnie. I'd curl up with a good book or a movie or hang out here with our cool crowd. It's really the lifestyle here that's killing me. Had it been a normal country and a normal city where you actually meet people every place you go, I wouldn't have had any problem as I'm not shy and I'm responsive to people. If I really want to find somebody, I'll have to go the online route. There's simply no other way here. At least that's the way I see it in my age bracket and also because I don't enjoy going to restaurants and bars because of being a smoker. But even if it weren't for that, these are still places you go to with people you already know. The chances of meeting anybody in a restaurant are slim to none (well, to me there are hardly any restaurants here except for the very fancy ones; they're just plain eateries); in bars the chances are high, but most of those people you likely don't want to meet to begin with...
Also, as I've said before, I've had more than my fair share of relationship crapola and I can just hang it up. You can't, though. At least that's not what a normal young girl should do. Perhaps you should give the dating sites a shot...
ya you know me, I'm just as friendly. I have a TON of friends and always have things on my social agenda, but ya, its still hard to meet people. Everywhere I go, everyone is coupled up, and so are all their friends..its lame.
I did just take the plunge to online dating . its nevewracking. already met one guy that repulsed the heck out of me (he was a TERRIBLE kisser, I had no idea they existed). so I'm just not sure about it right now. we'll see. I already know I'll have to go through a lot of b.s. in order to find someone but its a step.
I did just take the plunge to online dating . its nevewracking. already met one guy that repulsed the heck out of me (he was a TERRIBLE kisser, I had no idea they existed). so I'm just not sure about it right now. we'll see. I already know I'll have to go through a lot of b.s. in order to find someone but its a step.
Well, the sample is pretty small!
There's something else I don't get, though... You say you want to move after you graduate. What's the point of a serious relationship then...? How many more years do you think you'll be in town?
There's something else I don't get, though... You say you want to move after you graduate. What's the point of a serious relationship then...? How many more years do you think you'll be in town?
well I'm gonna be here a while so I figure if I am even lucky enough to meet anyone, I'll cross that bridge when I get there. who knows if I'll even get to leave here. its a matter of how my life plays out at this point.
well I'm gonna be here a while so I figure if I am even lucky enough to meet anyone, I'll cross that bridge when I get there. who knows if I'll even get to leave here. its a matter of how my life plays out at this point.
Well, yeah... it's not like you have to put your life on hold until then... I just didn't know how much time we're talking about.
What bothers me about seeing my friends and acquaintances starting to enter the engagement/marrying phase is that the (female) ones that do are disproportionately the objectively better ones: they are on the whole smarter, better looking, the kind of person who is more likely to treat a significant other better, etc. than the general population.
My main worry is not so much being forever alone, but rather that by the time I can date at my 'natural' level again (my career was knocked for a bit of the detour by the recession + several years were lost spent in a failed relationship followed by a long emotional recovery), the dating pool will be much weaker if I want to continue mainly seeing women my own age, and downright anemic if I'm single into my thirties.
What bothers me about seeing my friends and acquaintances starting to enter the engagement/marrying phase is that the (female) ones that do are disproportionately the objectively better ones: they are on the whole smarter, better looking, the kind of person who is more likely to treat a significant other better, etc. than the general population.
My main worry is not so much being forever alone, but rather that by the time I can date at my 'natural' level again (my career was knocked for a bit of the detour by the recession + several years were lost spent in a failed relationship followed by a long emotional recovery), the dating pool will be much weaker if I want to continue mainly seeing women my own age, and downright anemic if I'm single into my thirties.
the irony is that I have a lot of friends who are not very attractive and find the greatest guys in the world. Sometimes its not even my friends, I just see it around..and sometimes these women are not only not attractive (the ones I know that are NOT my friends), but they also have awful personalities. Meanwhile I meat people who don't understand why I'm single..its bizarre, lol.
anyways, people say women in their 30's are desperate...men in their 30's are getting really really desperate..and its actually sometimes really scary how pushy they get. But the funny thing is, these guys dn't realize how many single women there are out there, their age!
the irony is that I have a lot of friends who are not very attractive and find the greatest guys in the world. Sometimes its not even my friends, I just see it around..and sometimes these women are not only not attractive (the ones I know that are NOT my friends), but they also have awful personalities. Meanwhile I meat people who don't understand why I'm single..its bizarre, lol.
anyways, people say women in their 30's are desperate...men in their 30's are getting really really desperate..and its actually sometimes really scary how pushy they get. But the funny thing is, these guys dn't realize how many single women there are out there, their age!
The social circles I tend to move in are highly atypical (absolutely dominated by athletic, relatively sociable nerds) and my experience may not be, and probably isn't, typical.
edit: in fact, I'm sure if you slice the population up into different social and demographic chunks the relative impact of aging on the dating market probably changes drastically.
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I'm sorry, Mir... I'm really sorry for your generation in general.
I'd curl up with a good book or a movie or hang out here with our cool crowd. It's really the lifestyle here that's killing me. Had it been a normal country and a normal city where you actually meet people every place you go, I wouldn't have had any problem as I'm not shy and I'm responsive to people. If I really want to find somebody, I'll have to go the online route. There's simply no other way here. At least that's the way I see it in my age bracket and also because I don't enjoy going to restaurants and bars because of being a smoker. But even if it weren't for that, these are still places you go to with people you already know. The chances of meeting anybody in a restaurant are slim to none (well, to me there are hardly any restaurants here except for the very fancy ones; they're just plain eateries); in bars the chances are high, but most of those people you likely don't want to meet to begin with...
. its nevewracking. already met one guy that repulsed the heck out of me (he was a TERRIBLE kisser, I had no idea they existed). so I'm just not sure about it right now. we'll see. I already know I'll have to go through a lot of b.s. in order to find someone but its a step.
