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Thanks for the words of encouragement. Part of my problem is that I'm also afraid to approach women because of fear of rejection. I get rejected by 1 or 2 girls and then give up completely talking to women for a year or two. Sometimes avoiding conversation.
Dude, don't go there. While I am no expert on women, I do know some things about life (having a son who's older than you are.) I guarantee you that if you just shook off the rejection and went back out there, you will be richly rewarded, if you know what I mean. Sometimes you have to cast a wide net to get the kinds of fish (or mermaids) you want.
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My friend has been a big help. He told me to fix myself up and he gets countless women but he gets rejected by a ton of women. I didn't even know he gets rejected by women until he took me out clubbing one night. For some reason I thought he gets every single girl he wants but I realized he just has a higher success rate because he's confident and he has done everything he can to fix himself up.
Remember, unless you are the absolute most beautiful male creature on Earth, you will experience rejection, and lots of it. Even guys like your friend, as you have seen, get rejected. The most successful men are those who try and keep trying until they are successful. Remember also, that even a batting average of .001 for an ugly dude represents some level of success, and it's obvious that you're doing a lot better than that. And if you fix yourself up (cosmetically, physically, educationally, financially, whatever), you are bound to succeed in whatever you do - on and off the playing field.
My friend has been a big help. He told me to fix myself up and he gets countless women but he gets rejected by a ton of women. I didn't even know he gets rejected by women until he took me out clubbing one night. For some reason I thought he gets every single girl he wants but I realized he just has a higher success rate because he's confident and he has done everything he can to fix himself up.
If you don't like the "numbers game" your friend engages in, why not date the friends of his girls? Meet his girls, make a good impression, and say "bring one of your friends next time." You can avoid rejection, are more likely to keep your self esteem intact, and still have more women than you can handle by going this route.
Dude, don't go there. While I am no expert on women, I do know some things about life (having a son who's older than you are.) I guarantee you that if you just shook off the rejection and went back out there, you will be richly rewarded, if you know what I mean. Sometimes you have to cast a wide net to get the kinds of fish (or mermaids) you want.
Remember, unless you are the absolute most beautiful male creature on Earth, you will experience rejection, and lots of it. Even guys like your friend, as you have seen, get rejected. The most successful men are those who try and keep trying until they are successful. Remember also, that even a batting average of .001 for an ugly dude represents some level of success, and it's obvious that you're doing a lot better than that. And if you fix yourself up (cosmetically, physically, educationally, financially, whatever), you are bound to succeed in whatever you do - on and off the playing field.
If you don't like the "numbers game" your friend engages in, why not date the friends of his girls? Meet his girls, make a good impression, and say "bring one of your friends next time." You can avoid rejection, are more likely to keep your self esteem intact, and still have more women than you can handle by going this route.
I still got rejected. It's just me socially. I have to learn to talk to women. I'm going to get constantly rejected no matter which girl I talk to until I'm much more savvy.
I still got rejected. It's just me socially. I have to learn to talk to women. I'm going to get constantly rejected no matter which girl I talk to until I'm much more savvy.
My post was in response to your quote below. I assumed your definition of "rejection" was "getting turned down during cold approaches". My response was tailored towards that scenario and gave you a solution that eliminated cold approaches.
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Originally Posted by Veyron
Part of my problem is that I'm also afraid to approach women because of fear of rejection. I get rejected by 1 or 2 girls and then give up completely talking to women for a year or two. Sometimes avoiding conversation.
I was trying to remove the "rejection" aspect of approaching women in a cold call sort of way. At least if you meet female friends of your guy's dates, you can just hang out a few times in a group setting and get to know these women on a casual basis first. Don't ask her out on the first day, just converse with her over a few meetings. I don't see how rejection exists in this type of casual scenario. It should be easier to tell if the women are interested without putting yourself out there.
If I were in your shoes, I'd practice by having conversations with women I'm not attracted to, then working my way up to women I'm slightly attracted to, and finally up to the women I really wanted.
At least you know your problems and are working to fix them. I wish you the best.
My post was in response to your quote below. I assumed your definition of "rejection" was "getting turned down during cold approaches". My response was tailored towards that scenario and gave you a solution that eliminated cold approaches.
I was trying to remove the "rejection" aspect of approaching women in a cold call sort of way. At least if you meet female friends of your guy's dates, you can just hang out a few times in a group setting and get to know these women on a casual basis first. Don't ask her out on the first day, just converse with her over a few meetings. I don't see how rejection exists in this type of casual scenario. It should be easier to tell if the women are interested without putting yourself out there.
If I were in your shoes, I'd practice by having conversations with women I'm not attracted to, then working my way up to women I'm slightly attracted to, and finally up to the women I really wanted.
At least you know your problems and are working to fix them. I wish you the best.
I think the appearance of your teeth is a big deal. You will feel better about yourself in general, not just on the dating front. Shop around though and look at portfolios of various dentist's work. If you are going to fork out that kind of money, you don't want them to look fake. Ask around at work to see who the big shot cosmetic dentists in your area are. I live in a moderate sized city (120K), so we really only have one 1st rate cosmetic dentist. Might be worth going to your nearest big city to be sure to get good quality work.
So I have been working on my look. I'm 6'2" 205 lbs. I'm in great shape.
My flaws are that I'm slightly balding (so I keep my hair cut low sort of like amber rose or vin diesal), I have minor acne 1 or 2 tiny bumps (which I'm trying to get my skin perfect ), a big nose.(well a typical black guys noise) but my teeth are bad...
I'm getting ready to spend 6,000$ to get perfect white teeth.
There's nothing I can do about my nose or low hair cuts.
Will the teeth make a big difference?
Yes and so will your CONFIDENCE which is equally important if not moreso.
So fix your teeth, but I doubt this is the reason you constantly get rejected. How do you approach women, by the way? I find a lot of black guys approach women in a very cocky way like they are God's gift to women.. Is that you? Perhaps your approach to women is what needs to change, not the teeth.
Yes, the teeth will make a ton of difference. Not just because they'll look nice but because bad teeth often translates to bad breath as well and that's a huge turnoff. Don't give the balding another thought; my hb is almost completely bald but he is as sexy as they come because he has all his other stuff together and he's a wonderful man.
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I guarantee you that if you just shook off the rejection and went back out there, you will be richly rewarded, if you know what I mean. Sometimes you have to cast a wide net to get the kinds of fish (or mermaids) you want.
