Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Oh well, as soon as I can find someone to agree to do it I will. I would definitely sign a consent form releasing my OBGYN from any liability if it meant could have the procedure done. I think it would be more than worth it for my own piece of mind.
Keep trying. There are enlightened doctors out there who understand that some people make the choice when young and never, ever regret it.
Have you tried Planned Parenthood? At least get a referral to a doctor who will perform a tubal without argument.
It's not the doctor's place to anticipate regret or project what they think your life might be 20 years down the road. On CF message boards, women have been advised to go into the office with a confident attitude. You aren't asking if you can have a tubal, you are telling them you want the procedure. If you put forth an attitude that you know it is permanent, you have thought out all the ramifications, and you are absolutely sure you will have no regrets, the doctor has no reason to refuse unless they're some sort of Santorum-type.
Ditto this. It's one of the most important things that a couple can discuss, no matter where you are in the dating process. I suspect that most people of child-bearing age simply assume that they will eventually have children. The fairest thing you can do is to get it out on the table as soon as practicable. Maybe not on a first date, but as soon as you feel like you "click" with someone. My S.O. was very forthright about not wanting children from the start — which is why I figured he'd make a good candidate for the long run.
I work 50 plus hours a week and i'm not lazy when it comes to working etc.
but i value my personal time,
i want to be able to go back to grad school, move or travel when I want too with freedom.
I am still into childish things, like comic books, cartoons, star trek etc.
My cat is enough work for me.
Is this wrong? weird?
I am 34 also with no kids and do not want one ever. It does not make you selfish. It would be selfish if you had a kid and you did not devote your time to your kid,.
Comic Books. Cartoons and Star Trek does not make you childish. It is a hobby.
For females the procedure is much more complicated and if they change their mind down the road there is no turning back.
I'm not sure if a man has to be a certain age or not.
So the person signs a waiver as I had to back in 1977.
I have never heard of anyone who decided to have a tubal ligation who went back to sue a doctor.
I guess women don't know their minds and need to be guided to do what's expected.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alanboy395
Liability. Doctors are probably fearful if the woman who has no kids changes her mind and encounters difficulity getting pregnant after attempting to reverse the original surgery they can be found liable.
Even though that never happened (as far as I can tell and I've been looking for examples for over a decade now).
It gets down to men (the medical industry) thinking that women are too stupid to know what they want.
We know it's permanent.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alanboy395
That doesn't mean the court could not mind a loophole if they wanted to override it and find the doctor liable. As a guy who did well in his business law classes, courts can find a way to override a lot of stuff.
Then they shouldn't be in business.
As I said, I've looked on-line for over 10 years and can't find any examples of women attempting to sue over a WANTED ligation. The waiver would work.
Why can men have vasectomies?
Are women too stupid to know what they want?
That's what it boils down to.
By the way, that would be medical malpractice that you're talking about, quite different from business law.
If you were 20-25 and saying this, I'd likely say you didn't yet know what you want.
Utter nonsense. I knew at the age of 4 I did NOT want any children, ever. 40 years later I still don't. If you don't want kids, you don't want them... ever.
I guess women don't know their minds and need to be guided to do what's expected.
I am as childfree as they come, but I do think that someone who's still in their 20s should wait until that phase of their lives has passed before making such a life-altering decision. One's 20s is a decade devoted to self-exploration and self-becoming. I only thought I knew what I wanted when I was in my 20s, but I turned out a different person entirely. I think that what a lot of doctors are saying is, "Hey, wait ... give it a few more years and make sure this is what you really want."
It's not the doctor's place to anticipate regret or project what they think your life might be 20 years down the road. On CF message boards, women have been advised to go into the office with a confident attitude. You aren't asking if you can have a tubal, you are telling them you want the procedure. If you put forth an attitude that you know it is permanent, you have thought out all the ramifications, and you are absolutely sure you will have no regrets, the doctor has no reason to refuse unless they're some sort of Santorum-type.
^^^
Exactly.
I had mine done in Europe - it was easier in the States in the 70s than it is today.
I guess women got too stupid to realize what they were asking for in that time.
Never regretted it.
Quote:
Originally Posted by supernaut112
I am as childfree as they come, but I do think that someone who's still in their 20s should wait until that phase of their lives has passed before making such a life-altering decision. One's 20s is a decade devoted to self-exploration and self-becoming. I only thought I knew what I wanted when I was in my 20s, but I turned out a different person entirely. I think that what a lot of doctors are saying is, "Hey, wait ... give it a few more years and make sure this is what you really want."
Good, then you wait and let others decide for themselves.
Just because you were too immature to know what you wanted, that doesn't mean that the rest of the world doesn't know.
I guess women are just too stupid to know what they want.
Do you question people who have kids in their teens and 20s?
What if they change their minds?
Better to make the decision to not breed, than breed and realize that it's not for you later.
Utter nonsense. I knew at the age of 4 I did NOT want any children, ever. 40 years later I still don't. If you don't want kids, you don't want them... ever.
I don't doubt that. But I have also known people that swore at 24 they would never have children and then wanted them desperately years later when they met the right person and got married. Don't get me wrong - I'm not saying that people who don't want children just haven't met the right person. I'm just saying that some people simply change their minds. My husband said he'd never date an actress - and instead, he married one! Some people change their minds about things - some people don't. I don't think there is anything wrong about things either way. And I also don't think you can always predict what you are going to change your mind about in years to come.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
