How long does it take you to get over a serious relationship (dating, guys) - Relationships -Dating, marriage, boyfriends, girlfriends, men, women, friends, attraction ... - City-Data Forum

AverageGuy2006 · 09-05-2012, 07:50 PM

Let's keep it subjective. A serious relationship can be defined differently by different people.
And people can be in a relationship for the same amount of time, but one couple may be more serious than the next.
For instance:
(for the sake of arguement, assume both couples started seeing each other at the same time)
Couple A: Spends the night (sleeps over) together practically every other night.
Couple B: Spends one weekday night (sleeps over) together, and one weekend night (sleeps over) together.
I would assume here that because couple A spends more time together, and are probably more serious than couple B, even though they are both at month 4 (for example) in the relationship).

So how long has it taken you to get over a relationship to where you weren't thinking about the ex-s/o, or bummed out about the failed relationship, etc (you have basically moved on) ? I read a post today and someone mentioned that they have no problem getting over a relationship, and move on extremely quickly. On the other hand, I feel that I probably DON'T move on quickly, and not that I obsess about the failed relationship, but for me it seems that the less healthy the relationship was for me, the longer it takes for me to recover from. Not sure if there is a correlation in non-healthy relationship and amount of time to recover....

And let's not assume that because you got into a rebound relationship immediately that you have moved on (although, if you DID move on because of the rebound, ok, but how long did moving on take WITH the rebound)

I assume those that didn't have a rebound took longer to 'get over' the relationship than those that did have a rebound.

I do believe that one sex (male or female) on average recovers more quickly than the other. But I would like the responces to speak for themselves.

For example: I am at almost 3 months (

) out of a 11 month relationship, and I would say that I am still not 100% recovered from the relationship. I think I am close, but the relationship was kinda bad, so I have struggled somewhat to get back to my normal self.
How about you ?

Raena77 · 09-05-2012, 07:53 PM

There was another thread like this. But I'll say it again.
3 months on one ex.
3 yrs. Sons father.

ja1myn · 09-05-2012, 07:55 PM

I've only had one serious relationship in my life and it took me like half a millisecond to get over her because I found out that she was cheating on me with multiple guys throughout our relationship.

the minx · 09-05-2012, 07:58 PM

It depends on the relationship.

Some I can walk away from and never look back. Others I just hang on to....maybe it's hope, not wanting to close the door. Some people affect me more than others.

AverageGuy2006 · 09-05-2012, 08:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ja1myn

I've only had one serious relationship in my life and it took me like half a millisecond to get over her because I found out that she was cheating on me with multiple guys throughout our relationship.

and this is interesting to me, because I find that relationships like this that are toxic, for some reason are MORE difficult for me to recover from. It is like it hurts more because they were cruel..... as opposed to moving on quicker.

Prince_Frog · 09-05-2012, 08:00 PM

About a month and I'm no longer thinking of her.

But I don't leap back into the dating scene either.

AverageGuy2006 · 09-05-2012, 08:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Raena77

There was another thread like this. But I'll say it again.
3 months on one ex.
3 yrs. Sons father.

how long was each relationship ?

ja1myn · 09-05-2012, 08:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AverageGuy2006

and this is interesting to me, because I find that relationships like this that are toxic, for some reason are MORE difficult for me to recover from. It is like it hurts more because they were cruel..... as opposed to moving on quicker.

A lot of people are like you, but my anger for that person usually instantly deletes all positive feelings I once had for them instantly. Maybe I'm the cruel one.

Lariat · 09-05-2012, 08:15 PM

Pretty quickly. Too quick for many.

If it's over, it's over. Cut everything off and disappear.

AverageGuy2006 · 09-05-2012, 08:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ja1myn

A lot of people are like you, but my anger for that person usually instantly deletes all positive feelings I once had for them instantly. Maybe I'm the cruel one.

I wish my anger would help me forget about them. haha.
It's not even that I have positive feelings about her anymore, just for some reason the toxic relationships take me longer to recover from.