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This. (I couldn't rep again, I've repped enough people in this thread alone)
You are giving everyone else power to how YOU feel about YOURSELF. Does that make any freaking sense at all?? Didn't think so. Is it easy to get over insecurity and low self esteem? No. But for your own sanity, you should start learning to do so and take baby steps if you have to. You need to worry more about having value to YOURSELF. To hell with having value to anyone else. Do they pay your bills? Are they doing anything for you? No. Then who gives a flying rats ass what your value is to them right now.
Hell even if you have to do this every day, do it:
This. (I couldn't rep again, I've repped enough people in this thread alone)
You are giving everyone else power to how YOU feel about YOURSELF. Does that make any freaking sense at all?? Didn't think so. Is it easy to get over insecurity and low self esteem? No. But for your own sanity, you should start learning to do so and take baby steps if you have to. You need to worry more about having value to YOURSELF. To hell with having value to anyone else. Do they pay your bills? Are they doing anything for you? No. Then who gives a flying rats ass what your value is to them right now.
Hell even if you have to do this every day, do it:
And that is just fine. As far as being positive? I do it for myself. It makes for a much better life when one is keeping a positive viewpoint in life. I don't think anyone has to agree with anything. Just as you stated how you feel, so did I.
Doll Eyes, you don't have to change your way of thinking for a soul in this world. You be the you that you are.
In this thread, I have admired many of your view points.
Hope you have a nice weekend.
well if you do it all for yourself that was all I was saying, I beleive a lot of other people do it so they can fit in better to society. I figure, if you're already on the outskirts of society, may as well go as far out as possible. LOL. My therapist try to say I have to 'change the way I think' if I am going to fit into society better. But I agree with you if you like things as they are, why change it for others?
you have made a lot of good posts on here and I do not 'get' all over your POV sometimes with these peoples dire & dead end situations but at least you're not saying it to be a 'people pleaser.' have a nice weekend
Well, Nyanna, I just read this and I have a better understanding now. I was made to feel that way for many years. Like I just wasn't good enough. The difference is that it was in an emotionally abusive marriage.
I recall you mentioning even your father telling you weren't good enough in one way or another. I do understand what you are going through but I don't quite understand exactly why you are going through it.
For some reason in your life I suppose you were made to feel like you were not good enough and it has continued on into other areas in your life.
It can be hard to overcome, but it can be done. When you are told enough times that you are no good you begin to believe it and you are right, it can consume you. I am sorry for judging you. I still think that therapy could help you tremendously. There are also a few good books that you could read, and I wish I could remember what they are, but I will think about it.
You just have to come to terms that you are who you are. You need to learn to see yourself in a more positive light and carry yourself in a more positive manner. You need to lift your head up and just be proud of who you are.
Robyn
Yes, I have been made to feel like I was not good enough. I talked about how some male friends used to say I had a body like a 12 year old boy, they constantly teased me about this, and would compare me to very voluptuously shaped women in music videos, pinup magazines or girls they knew. It stung so bad and I have a hard time recovering from this. Since I don't get positive reinforcement, I don't know how to put myself in a positive frame of mind. I can't think of any positive attributes that I have to make myself feel better.
Despite what people say Nyanna's threads are always a hit, she lures you in. they're always like 50 pages long. LOL. I can't get my threads to go on like that!
When we are out in public, I will point out a beautiful woman to him... "Oh she is really pretty..."
.
I wonder why women do this? Is it because you feel that a man is going to oogle that pretty woman anyway, so you may as well strike first and point her out?
How many men do this? Men..if you are out walking around with your woman, and a hot dude walks by..do you point him out to your wife/girlfriend and say.."oh he is really good looking"?
It just seems like I hear more women doing that as opposed to men.
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